Partners support!?

We also have a toddler and my husband is extremely hands on. He works full time but we divide and conquer around that. He gets up with both children in the morning as I’m breastfeeding through the night so I get an extra 30-60mjns in bed. Then as soon as he finishes work we split everything. Our baby is a complete Velcro baby and hates being put down which makes it difficult as you have to be carrying her and moving all the time but he just gets on with it, especially when he knows I’ve been doing it all day. He tends to take the baby and I’ll take the toddler just to give me a bit of a break. She’s also fussiest at the end of the day so he gets her at her worst 🥵😅

Hi I have a similar situation although my partner will sit with me & the baby and we do stuff together when he's off work. I've started to make a plan the day before of what time I want him to take the baby and for how long and like letting him know in advance. I think now our babies are getting older it's feasible for partner to take for longer but they are used to what they were like as newborns (glued to mum) so probably will take some adjusting. I'm finding it hard as I'm breastfeeding on demand every 1-2 hours so feel like I don't have much freedom anyway. So for example I've told my partner I want him to take the baby first thing in the morning after I've fed him and then again later on. Probably be best just to communication clearly to your partner rather than letting resentment build up xx

My husband works full time and travels 3 hours a day for work and still does as much as he can during the time he is at home, both with jobs and looking after baby. I’d say you should expect more as you are a team! I do all night feeds bar one night a week usually Friday or Saturday where we swap so I can get a good solid big sleep banked. I also find it’s easier to just ask/tell them what support you want openly as they’re not always the most proactive otherwise 😂

It's really annoying, I just want my partner to do some bits around the house without me having to ask and instruct what to do. And I wish I didn't have to always have the mental load, especially when you are barely sleeping! Saying that my husband does look after my toddler during weekends and evenings which is great, don't get me wrong they are a very cute duo! But it's like he can only see the things in front of him so all the more subtle things like cutting our toddler's nails, deciding if his clothes need washing or can be worn another day, changing his bedding- it's like he doesn't see them and so I have to do those.

Give him the baby and don't take him back off him. Wait until he asks you then say "do you know what really annoys me right now? The fact I have him 24/7 regardless of whether you're at home or not, and the one time you do actually take him, you can't have him for the whole day like I do everyday"