Is it worth staying?
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That’s messed up. I saved myself for marriage (kinda) but I never expected anyone I dated to not have a past and tbh if that was a dealbreaker i would’ve made that clear from day 1. Was he a virgin before he met you? Cause if not that so hypocritical and ridiculous to say to you
He’s a weirdo. I would be out.
Like someone else mentioned; he’s telling you directly how he feels about you and who he is as a person, and If you know you wouldn’t have entertained him if you were still a virgin; you already know your answer. It’s time to gooooooooo
@Maisey I wish he would have said something earlier. Here we are years later and I find this out. No he wasn’t a virgin he had been with so many people he lost count. I ofc didn’t know this originally he gave me a completely different answer.
wtf? He’s a lunatic
How many women has he been with? He’s trying to make out like you’ve done wrong and you haven’t! Major red flag 🚩
He sounds insincere or very backwards. There's definitely someone much better out there for you. This guy sounds like he's just in your way
@Sam he doesn’t know the amount of women. Claims he lost track, which is why Is why I don’t Understand his stance.
There's nothing to understand. He sounds like he's playing you. Every day you spend with him is a bonus for him. You deserve much better.
He is such a hypocrite!!
that’s fucking ridiculous, the double standard is crazy. i’d be gone
what a giant absolute asshole
Sounds like he’s been watching too many of them fresh and fit pod casts 😭 Cus how’s he lost count of who he’s slept with but “your not marryable because your not pure” is he the type of man you want to raise your daughters or influence sons
Fuck that man. Put him in the trash where he belongs.
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He sounds like a dick.
To me, this isn’t an isolated issue. This kind of mindset buries itself in the very core of men. Your partner is a very misogynistic man to have this view point ESPECIALLY if he himself is not a virgin. No I would not stay. This is something that really separates the good men from the bad. In order to think this way your partner does not view you as an equal but a lesser being. This is so much bigger than the issue you’ve presented. He most likely does not respect women, does not respect you, and completely objectifies you. A person who can do this to another person is dangerous. This type of mindset is what allows men to commit serious acts of violence against women and think they’re entitled to do so. I could not stay. I assume you have children and while I see why that would be a reason to stay, to me, it would be the total opposite. I could not have someone who believes such a dangerous, misogynistic rhetoric raise my children.
who tf said to stay and work it out?? with this level of blatant disrespect and hypocrisy? gtfoooo
Thank him for sharing. Say you want him to find what he deserves. Look sad. Leave then start your bright new future. When he comes calling again, which he probably will once you have moved on, feign insanity. He'll quickly find an excuse to leave again.
He's probably just grossed out at himself and subconsciously worried you might one day start feeling he's gross. So he's flipping the roles
How about the other girls he's made "impure"? Please dump him Whoever he meets, he's going to make that woman feel special by making out he chose her out of what sounds like dozens of other women. But it's a scam. Nobody can save him. The feeling that one can is seductive but it's not real
🚩 I'd be walking!
I thought so it’s ok for him to have multiple sexual partners but 1 from your side is a problem? Double standards
I’m sorry but the amount of people you sleep with doesn’t determine your worth as a human being.
What a pos. Imagine saying that to a person you claim to love. Honestly he’s disgusting and doesn’t deserve any more of your time.
Its not worth it. His mentality is never gonna change. If he is that pure himself then he shouldnt be with you at all , why is he drawing a line at marriage. Dont doubt yourself its not you its him. Talk to him that you want to settle in life and if he is not upto it and he can leave without wasting anymore of your time. Find someone who doesnt make you feel that your past is a fault. Find someone who sees a future with you.
@Mas every single wordddd
What about you not wanting to marry him as he’s not a virgin either?
This is an excuse for him to not marry you. Don’t even pay attention to it and move on with your life
kick him to the CURB
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It seems like you have waisted 3 precious years of your life with the wrong person,walk away before he changes his mind and wants to marry you to make this judgement even worse. You don’t need to do anything to be loved, sometimes we spend our time trying to convince people of our worth, we try to look prettier, smarter, etc. But the truth is that we DON’T NEED TO DO ANYTHING, you don’t have to do anything to deserve someone’s love, because when someone really loves you, he’ll see you with his heart and will see you as a perfect person, with all your imperfections and past experiences. He obviously doesn’t love you and he is that kind of person who will never be satisfied with all our efforts. Your “imperfections”, “past experiences “ and “mistakes” are not defects, they are the key to recognizing those who really love you! You deserve better 💖
@Lyss I wish I didn’t pick my gif so fast I would’ve used this one 10000%
@incognito - focus on making yourself independent so it's easier to cut him loose.
So what was his goal in telling you this? To make you feel bad? Unworthy? Guilty? Not marriage material? So you can time travel and stay a virgin? Throw this one back.
lol that's so hypocritical considering he wasn't a virgin himself 🙄
@Parker 又 are you a Monty python fan?!? Not enough people appreciate this movie I think! lol
@Lyss I am and so is my son. 😌
@Parker 又 See I knew you were a good mom!! Raising him right!! 😆😂
How are you supposed to work it out? You can't go back in time and not have sex. He's using reasons to not be with you which you now have no control over. He's just trying to make you feel bad as a way of manipulating and controlling you later on. Basically he's a dick.
I’m disgusted at the 6% that said you should stay and work it out . Actually no not disgusted , I feel sad cause clearly those are people letting others manipulate and play them like a fiddle. Don’t ever let another human demean you for the choices you made if it didn’t affect anyone but you. He should have respected the fact you were honest with him and not put that stupid double standard on you like a d***head. Oh I hate this for you and you should run as fast as you can , I mean the FASTEST
I’m sorry, what that young man meant to say was “I need therapy, don’t marry me even if I decide to give you the chance. I’m severely emotionally and mentally immature and I will lead you into further misery.” I hope the 90+% of us out here that have your back have helped you grow the hell up out of that relationship. Boy BYE 👋 I agree, it feels like you’ve wasted 3 years of your life — but you haven’t, because there are valuable lessons to be learned here that nobody can take from you & some things you won’t tolerate moving forward 🙌 So that’s a win. For real girl, tell him thanks for reminding you that you can’t marry someone that isn’t a virgin and then block him. He loves your body but not you, even though you are WORTHY and DESERVING of love. You know you are, so don’t *settle* for this ABSOLUTE B.S. That fool has some reeeeal audacity lookin at you sideways when he a WHOLE MESS. Leave this child in your past where he belongs. God’s got MUCH better in store for you ahead.
“I would have married you by now if (fill in the blank)” means I’m not marrying you now nor ever bc I’m stuck on something that I don’t like and that nobody can change. A husband honors and esteems his wife, he doesn’t look down on her. He is not your person & now that’s clear, good riddance. I am divorced and remarried. I was a virgin the first time, and my second husband was a virgin when we married ~ God was in those details because THANKFULLY we are a match 🙌 There was a *moment* when he felt like I wasn’t “pure” like him and my response was “You’re crazy as hell! Don’t ever come at me like that, not in your mind, not in your sleep, not anywhere not ever. We are the same breed 🙄” But what he meant was that we were different developmentally at that point in time & that was accurate. But purity is the state of your heart and how you conduct yourself in this present moment, not a permanent label. From what we’ve all read, he’s as relationally impure as they come 🤣 You’re FINE sis 👌
You should for sure leave him and i don’t usually support this but you should also actively try to cheat on him first 🫶
Was he a virgin when you both started dating? Did he “lose” his virginity to you? If the answer is NO and YES you should tell him you wouldn’t marry him either for being a man whore
Sounds like he’s projecting and he really don’t want to marry you. He’s just thinking of reason not too
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I wouldn’t be ok with him being allowed to sleep with many women when you couldn’t all before you two even became anything ! Me and my husband don’t hold our past against the other because it didn’t matter it was before each other and doesn’t matter we had a life before one another. That is very hypocritical too and not ok!
Is he even a virgin. He sounds toxic af to be honest. I would not stay. I’d ask him to go to couples therapy with me and maybe go from their if I really wanted to try and make it work, but honestly no. Sounds like unfortunately you wasted your time and energy on a pos
He told you how he feels about you. Believe it and decide if you want someone who feels that way about you