in February 2022 Babies 🇬🇧

Venting

I’ve come on here to vent because I don’t really have any friends My partner has been sick this past week, 2 of the days he was bed bound and even had to go hospital. I’ve been looking after our 2 month old and 3 year old, which isn’t much difference from when he’s at work during the week and I’m with both kids. But adding in the lack of sleep this past week due to him also being ill and me looking after him and doing little things like clearing up vomit that accidentally got on the floor or getting tablets and flannels and lemsips etc and I don’t say a word about it because it’s out of love right… Now I’m sick today and not feeling great and he has had the 3 year old most the day and the 2 month old for a couple hours but is bragging about it “ “well I went to the soft play for 2 hours and I’ve had her all day so I’m tired too” And when I say but I look after both of them all day and have them bathed and in bed before you get home from work his reply is “Well you try going to work all day” And I asked him to get me a lemsip when he went to get the baby milk and he came to and said “ look at me I get lemsip and milk” Like is there. A need for bragging ? Should I start bragging for everything I do or is that petty ? - your clothes are all washed, dried and put away - a home cooked meal is ready for you - your children are bathed and in bed - your calendar and email is double checked by me because I’m basically your personal assistant As you don’t know how to read / reply or book appointments !!! The list could go on of things I do…. But I never boast about it because I do it out of love!

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MEN!!! honestly 🙄🙄🙄

Tell him you’ll go to work and he looks after the kids I guarantee he wouldn’t last a week! They have no idea how tough it is 😡 my youngest sons dad has 3 kids under 4 including mine and he said going to work is a break for him because looking after the kids is hard

Sorry to hear you’re going through this 🥺🥺🥺 As hard as it sounds … stop doing the chores around the house. Just look after your kids and do the essentials like feeding them. I worked full time and still did everything in the house and felt sooo unappreciated!! So I stopped cleaning and cooking. Started eating out / ordering food and got a cleaner. Also dropped my hours to part time which meant my husband had to contribute more financially and now he is constantly cleaning, cooking and doing laundry so we don’t have to eat out as much and cleaner doesn’t come often. This way he saves £200-300 a month. Honestly, some people need to be hit hard with reality.

I meant stop doing them until he understands how much you actually do ^^

Gosh this would drive me nuts. Leave him at home from 6am - 8pm on his own and then when you get back.. ask if he's tidied up, cleaned, made dinner, done a bath for both babies, done the washing, and then act surprised when he hasn't. Going to work is a break, normal conversations with adults, breaks on shift, able to eat lunch in peace.. when I went back to work the 2 days were a break for me 🥲

Men want a pat on the back for bloody everything, honestly. Stop mothering him, too. And tell him you very much need him to parent the kids because you need a break. I've been through it with my husband. I left him with both kids for 3 hours and he was like I don't know how you do it.... our 3 month old is a velcro baby, doesn't sleep unless being held and is every hours for a feed..our 3 year old is wild and doesn't stop and wants constant attention and would be a velcro child if we let her. Men don't give birth for a reason. They're ultimately big children and need constant praise

Just say "is it a competition?" And see what he has to say!!!

Sounds like my husband 🙄 I also do everything in the house while also working full time and he will do the bare minimum and expect a praise from me. I am sick of catering to this behaviour and when I brought it up he calls me ungrateful and that I should be thankful he's around. Unfortunately I just don't think they understand or even fully acknowledge. I can't offer much advice but just know you are not alone in experiencing these things. I also feel isolated because I have no friends as they all left once I had kids and it's tough! Sending hugs

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