Would it be too far?

@Parker 又 I’ve tried a few different storage ideas unfortunately he likes to just dump them in a pile or carry them around with him it’s annoying but it’s more his entitlement to getting more and more trucks that’s my issue

@Belle understandable lolol my boy is a big fan of the good ol dump & carry, we do have a dump truck that he pushes around & collects all his cars in almost every night tho! Things with wheels go inside things with wheels in our house hehehe But that only happened cause I have the routine of doing that ever since we introduced cars to play with

Personally I think he’s still a little young to be taking his toys away because he’s leaving them about and playing rough with them. He’s just playing in his eyes. The whole leaving them about you can try and incorporate a “tidy up song” to get him engaged in tidying away his toys but as for playing with them a bit rough that’s just how he’s expressing himself through play. Maybe next time he breaks something you can say no to a new toy so he sort of try’s to grasp the concept of if it breaks mummy won’t get me another. But again he is really young. All u can do is keep engaging him in tidy up time and also trying to encourage “respect our toys” by not replacing broken ones.

@Shannon I agree it wouldn’t be because he’s being untidy it’s because he’s expecting me to get him a new one every time we go to the shop or ignoring his current trucks because he’s expecting a certain truck I really can’t have any kind of teachable moment with him about being greatful for the massive box of trucks he already has or not replacing trucks because he just melts down constantly, for the example he threw one of his trucks and said he didn’t like it because he’d decided on a new one he wanted. I just think there’s so many children that would love to have his collection and he just doesn’t appreciate the ones he owns it’s all about the next new one

Pack half away and rotate them, it makes what's old feel new again

@Raqi that’s a good idea!

My son loves cars and trucks! So I get it he always wants a new one lol at your sons age I think he’s too you to fully grasp how lucky he is for this stuff my son is 6 so he kinda gets it more now. We have a cool carrying case for the cars, I show him how to put them away and honestly it’s hard to open without a parents assistance so stop it from being all over the place lol

I just want to add that his behaviour over the last few weeks has really escalated yelling in my face slapping me ect it’s really hurting me that he’s treating me so poorly i understand he’s getting more testosterone and dealing with big emotions but this behaviour just can not continue

He is too little to truly understand, keep it simple. “We are not buying this truck today you have really cool ones at home” or maybe try to donate a few by asking him to choose a couple he doesn’t play with anymore to make room for new ones? So he doesn’t have as much for you to clean up. I agree with rotating them out! But taking away at this age will only confuse him and make him more upset.

@Belle oh definitely unacceptable. Do time outs. One of my kiddos is a bit aggressive (he’s on the spectrum tho so obviously a bit different) when he hits me or anything I full on remove myself and let him know we don’t do that to mommy and if we can’t be nice mommy is walking away and I always say it’s OK to be frustrated but not OK to hurt people

@Belle I completely get your frustration it’s definitely challenging. children respond differently to different methods. Try out a few different things and see what works best for you. I just think don’t forget he’s only a toddler and theses things are completely typical for young children as they are still learning and pushing/testing limits and boundaries. As long as u stick to your boundaries he’ll soon grasp it even if it does take some time. Hope this helps x

@Belle boy's testosterone levels don't start to go up until 6-8 and then go way up from 9-14 at puberty. These are just normal little kid big emotions, most kids have similar outbursts

@Raqi the research I’ve done suggests a surge of testosterone around 4 EDIT Nope I was wrong actually I looked back into it and it’s the luteinizing hormone

@Jay I’ve been sending him to his room but sometimes I think it’s making things worse we also have a 14 month old who’s life goal is to aggravate her brother so it makes it really difficult

I would recommend doing little chores to save up to replace the hot wheels. Nothing crazy, just like a dollar for helping with putting away dishes from the dish washer or helping you pick up toys. Realizing that replacing the trucks means working for them might make it click. Again, little easy chores 😆

I would definitely rotate them, as Raqi said. My daughter is barely 14mos but I've been rotating her toys and she really enjoys getting to play with "new" toys. I don't know how well this would work for an older toddler but you can try it. That way you aren't taking all of them away at once. You can tell him that the others had to go to the repair shop and figure out a reward system like giving him fake receipts/a repair ticket or something like that where he can then make a game out of it. Edit* you can also have him do baby chores around the house to pay for the repairs and bigger tasks can earn him a trip to the dealership where he can pick out a brand new one.

Imo there's a lot to unpack here, and it's mostly about your expectations and your role on this situation. Your son has obviously been spoiled (not a judgement) up until now and has had all the cars and trucks he wanted. But you have now decided that he was not grateful and you didn't like that. He is 4. Unfortunately you can't expect such a new and pretty big emotion from a 4 yo when they don't have a full functioning brain yet and might not have been shown what grateful is yet. I think lowering your expectations and understanding what a 4 yo is capable of would help (lots of information about that on the internet). Same for the way he plays with his toys which to me seems very age appropriate. You can't really teach a toddler just by talking to them. That's not how their brain works. A toddler learns through repetition, modelling and boundaries. Modelling would be showing what grateful can look like, on a regular basis, whether it is to him or any other people.

Repetition would be to ask him to tidy his toys, every day and ask if he wants your help and help him (also modelling). A tidy up song like said above is a great idea too. Also giving him a heads up like 5/10min prior helps a lot. Boundaries would be not replacing broken toys. And holding that boundary no matter what (that's the most crucial part). Finally, a toddler has meltdowns and tantrums. It's normal, it's healthy and it's important. As important as a parent learning how to navigate tantrums instead of punishing or giving in (none of which is helpful for anyone). There's a lot of information about that too on the internet. And another vote for rotating toys, it's one of my favourite tip for toddlers.

@Amandine he has been a bit spoilt his nan my mum spoils him massively and since they are such a little thing I do get the odd truck here and there there’s other things going on which I won’t talk about to strangers but we have gotten into a bit of a bad habit which I’ve been trying to break. I definitely think a 4 year old can be greatful for their toys and I’m not convinced his attitudes around the next new thing are developmentally appropriate or healthy. I have no problem with how he plays with his toys just highlighting that’s why a lot of them break, as for the rest I already do that all I’m not looking to blindly punish him I just want him to slow down and notice he has some pretty cool trucks, I didn’t think about a rotation it’s not something we tend to do because we have very limited cupboard space but it will probably be what I decided to go with if I can’t curb this behaviour

@Belle rotation works for us, but also , does your toddler go into shops n see what he wants n have meltdowns when out n about? Or does he just have tantrums when at home n a truck breaks? For the former we basically made it that we never buy anything when out n about shopping as we take him shopping alot, but if we have a day out he can pick a new car. So as its a habit now, he rarely protests but he is allowed to play as long as he wants in shops. For gratitude at home, I consistently make a big happy fuss when he is bought new things by other ppl, and when he plays with them, i remind him who bought it n wasn’t it nice of them? He does bring it up and go oh thanks! We have the space to keep all toys in separate room in a kalax ikea storage n he asks us now for specific cars whereas before he would play with a massive set of them

My SS also has loads and it was annoying us too. We got these clear Perspex shelves in Ikea and are putting them up in his bedroom at a height he can reach and he thinks it’s the coolest thing ever to be able to have them on display, hoping it will make him put them away but will keep you updated !

My nearly 3 year old is exactly the same. Obsessed with Monster Trucks & leaves them lying around. I have had to replace 2 so far because either me or his Dad have stood on them. Our little boy doesn't expect us to replace them, though. He is quite happy to still play with them when they only have 3 wheels. We make the decision to replace them.

Don’t buy toys outside of birthday and Christmas, don’t go to wild with the toys even then. When he breaks toys be sympathetic but tell him they can’t be replaced. Maybe he can add it to his wish list for Santa and be more careful with his other trucks in the meantime. If you’ve accidentally set the expectation of new toys regularly you’re going to have to dial it back. He won’t like it, do it as gently as you can. It’s not a punishment, it’s just the new normal

@Belle i don’t necessarily send my kids to their room i just remove myself from the situation. At this age it’s a lot of testing and pushing the boundaries. If I don’t pay attention to it, it ends a lot sooner I wouldn’t buy anything new at this point. When my son broke a toy I would so uh oh we have to throw that one out and when he said we need to buy a new one I tell no we don’t if we can’t learn to take care of our things I won’t be buying more.

Toys are great, but I think your intuition is right that he has too many. When toys are "cheap," kids don't appreciate them and each one feels less special. A few months ago, I purged about half of our toys and now my kids play so much better! I'd try something like this. Put ALL of them away for a week. At the end of the week, only get back out what he remembers and asks for. If a month goes by and he doesn't even remember toys that are missing, donate them. If you don't want to do something that drastic, then at least set aside half of them that he doesn't play with as much. If you do try it, I think you'll find that he appreciates the toys he has better and plays with them in a more focused way.

My son is the same he’s 4 and loves monster jam since he was 3. When he was 3 he would play so rough with them and they do break because yea they aren’t sturdy much haha glad they’re pretty inexpensive tho. Anyways now that he’s 4 I got a lot of ramps and other ways to play with the monster trucks. We would set up ramps all over the living room floor and he would pretend to do monster jam shows. Another one we got was a monster jam car wash that one was good. Yes my son still leaves his monster trucks all over but told him to line them up and make them “park” all in a line to help look organized. And I feel you on the always wanting a new monster truck at the store my sons the same esp when there’s so many different kinds.