How often do you feel like you're failing as a mom?
I have two daughters, one is 2.5 and the other is 10 months old. I feel like I try so hard to be a good mom, but I am constantly worrying that I'm screwing it all up. I cook healthy meals, I spend quality time with them together and separately when I can, I take them out and socialize them, I offer cuddles and do my best to validate their feelings without coddling or giving in to tantrums, I do my best to stay calm and level at all times, and I teach teach teach all day long. Despite all my efforts, I am so full of doubt. I lay awake thinking about the day and question everything about my approaches and responses to big feelings or conflict. Am I doing enough? Am I doing it right? How can I be better? It's like I'm striving to be the perfect mom but I have no idea what that even looks like and know full well it's not possible anyway. I'm so hard on myself when I mess up or snap at someone or just have a rough day. But I just want to be a great mom. How do you deal with the self doubt? How do you know if you're doing a good job?
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Do you need to be a perfect mom, or would top 15% be ok with you? You sound like you're already there, so tonight, skip the worrying, tell yourself you've done a good job, and get the extra rest. You can use the extra energy toward being the best mom you can be again tomorrow. It's not selfish, less thoughtful or whatever your inner critic is going to say about it. Getting the rest is just a better use of your limited time. It will help your whole family. Try it. 🙂 You are enough.....
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For me, when perfect strangers tell me how “well behaved” or how happy he is whenever I’m out grocery shopping or in a restaurant. I know I’m doing something right I took him to a Phillies game and every one in my section ate him up and an olde gentleman told me “Great parenting, Mom!” The little things I definitely feel like a failure and that I’ve failed him. I get it. Trust me!