Struggling.

Hi girls, does anyone have any tips on just feeling happy and normal again? My baby is 16 months and I love being his mum and spending time with him. It’s the best and being a mum isn’t the problem but I feel so numb to everything else. I’ve lost interest in everything, have no energy, seem to have drifted from friends, my relationship isn’t great at the moment and I feel like I’m begging to do something fun with him but there’s always an excuse, I feel hideous every single day, we live with my parents because we just can’t seem to get our own home. I know my family love us but also feel we’re in the way and I feel uncomfortable so just stuck in my room most days to keep out of the way. My siblings have made comments about me being there with my baby that have really hurt me before so I try to keep quiet and make sure his stuff isn’t everywhere. I feel so lonely but also wouldn’t have the energy to see anyone. My life has changed drastically, financially and in every way possible. It’s just hard. There’s so much more to it that’s probably making me feel like this too but I just don’t know the answer or how to get out of feeling like this. I’m so sick of crying every day and can’t see an end to it.

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I’ll start by saying that you absolutely deserve to feel happy again. I’m so sorry to hear that you’re struggling and know that you are not alone. In times of depression or anxiety, I find that talking to a therapist has helped me.

I would spend more time outside your family house . Play dates , coffee shops , parks and soft play . Save up for a home whilst still at your parents

One thing for sure you seem to be aware of what's causing you to feel this way just try to figure out the best way to overcome it , hopefully you'll get your own place it makes a huge difference, you can do this MAMA xx

To feel confident you have to be challenging yourself and overcoming challenges. Things like learning a new skill, meeting up with girls on this app, learning a language, starting the gym - anything! Is the only way to boost your confidence your mind will feel great that it pushed you out of your comfort zone.

After that it’s kind of like a cycle.. you radiate more positivity and others like having you around or want to be around you more. Remember to make others feel good when you are around them. Also get yourself some headphones and blast feel good music or a good podcast about confidence or anything else that interests you… hope this helps. I wish my husband would come live with my parents we would save so much more money he just won’t.

How could I forget! Your siblings comments is a big one. Perhaps it’s the energy you’re radiating too. If you were helping around the house, laughing or playful, baking some lovely desserts for everyone to share, taking an interest in their lives asking questions, letting them talk to you about personal things.. I doubt they would be making those comments. And if they still were… SO ?! That’s what siblings do sometimes we moan about each other? Let your siblings talk, it’s your parents too, you are allowed their support as much as they will need all of your support in the future… Staying together is the best thing… it’s how it’s supposed to be. The comments are only upsetting if you let them be… In a jokey way I’d be addressing it like “so I heard yalll been talkkkking shxt” ☝🏽☝🏽☝🏽 “wait till you guys have kids and you need my helpppp” but say it smiling.. if it’s still bad perhaps get a static caravan thingy you can get a nice one for £3k on Facebook marketplace :)

Dress up, put some makeup on (if you wear makeup) go for a walk in the park or go for a coffee, it’ll help you mentally. Then when you’re ready ask your friends or siblings to join you. Staying in the house, especially in one room, will drive you crazy🥺