Feel disconnected from baby

Not being funny, but why the fuck didn't you just tell him to piss off? I'd much rather do it alone than be with an absolute arsehole who treats me like dirt!

I'm sorry you're going through all that, that's a lot to deal with alone. Feel free to message if you ever need to chat. In my experience, post partum is a lot harder than the pregnancy both physically, mentally and emotionally. So things might get worse, not better :( (hopefully that's just worst case)

coming from someone who was in this situation except i felt very very connected to my baby, but LEAVE HIM. LEAVE LEAVE LEAVE HIM!! IT WILL ONLY GET WORSE!! u have a child to raise and to protect, if he’s shouting at u now your baby is hearing, feeling absolutely all of that. so imagine what it will be like when ur baby is here. protect your baby first, put your baby first, protect your babies peace first, prioritise your baby! do NOT chose this clearly toxic and abusive relationship over your child. it’s not fair on that poor bubba, i promise you it’ll be so much easier to leave him whilst your pregnant rather then when the baby is here. like i said just put ur kid first, u clearly know this relationship isn’t right as ur posting on a mums gc! i’m angry at myself for not doing the above, it was so hard for me to leave. pls don’t make the same mistake so many other mothers have made too! u CAN do this by yourself!

I had a similar experience. Girl you will be fine without him. Is this the type of person you want impacting your babies life? Maybe he has a good heart, maybe he’s not always like this. But this time you are in is the most vulnerable, most challenging time as a woman. You need support. Not for someone to take away the joys of being pregnant. I know this first hand. And these are things I wish I were told. It will be hard and frustrating. But you need to put you first. And it is hard doing that. Especially now. But I support you. Others support you. If you can lean on a few good friends or family, please do so. You will connect with your baby. I thought the same thing. I thought because I didn’t get to enjoy pregnancy and connect with baby intentionally, because of his feelings and impacts on me, that the baby and I wouldn’t connect. But I promise you, when that baby comes out, you are going to be so happy and in love. That baby is yours. Regardless of the abuse you’ve endured.

Contd.. that baby will love you and give you all the joy and show you how worth it this all was. You are strong and resilient and beautiful for going through this while enduring abuse. You are capable of greater things than he tells you you are. It’s so hard to get that voice out of your head. It’s hard not to doubt yourself. But you went through it, and you got through it, and you will continue to. It hurts when he doesn’t want to buy things or connect with baby himself. But down the line he just might begin to show he wants a relationship with baby. And that’s the best he can do. And that’s ok. YOU are enough for baby, and YOU are enough for you. It sucks it hurts, but you have to let him do what he wants. What’s meant to be will be, and you will make it out just fine. Even with the challenges that come along. Please keep your head up girl. I too still struggle with this as baby daddy is struggling to connect and be involved. But I have to let him do him. And I gotta do me & baby

Please leave. It’s really hard to do but you’ll be so thankful when you do, and quickly realise you should have done it earlier for your sanity and mental health. As mentioned though it’s not just you now, you have your baby yo protect. His abuse towards you will be abuse towards the baby. First years of a child’s life are critical in setting them up mentally for life. Don’t let the trauma pass on to your child, you can make it stop. I hope you find the strength. Here also if you ever need to chat. Just remember you’re stronger than you think you are, you feel beaten down right now but it doesn’t have to be like that any longer. You and your child deserve to be happy and safe

Running out of characters. But I support you. I am here if you ever want to message. Non judgement, just love You are great, and beautiful. Keep your head up

It is time to leave. You deserve so much better than this and so does your baby. There is a world out there in which you receive the love you deserve. Also consider going to therapy now, once the baby is here it is hard to find the time to heal. Sending you so much strength at this time ❤️

I get where your coming from especially BD been horrible I went through it and took me ages to see him for what he is and wish I got rid of him a lot sooner but glad I have got rid and that I’m raising my baby alone and hopefully you can do the same as you and baby deserve better than your partner

Speak to your midwife, see what supprt you can get and leave

Thank you everyone I know I need to be strong and make the clearly right decision just so hard when I have no other support from any friends or family

you have support from us and so many other women out there in ur situation. there are so many women (including myself) who wishes they had left earlier, at this point you need to realise how miserable your child will be if you stay in that toxic environment.

U might not feel anything but as soon as u hold ur baby in ur hand you’ll feel a diff kind of love. I’d just say fuck him tbh and it seems like u have support from his mom ?

Hey, my partner was fine in his own way throughout the pregnancy but I kept being scared that once the baby is here what if I don’t feel a bond or know how to treat them. I bought things last minute because I was scared of miscarriaging or/and it just didn’t feel real. But best believe the second the doctor told me I was going for an emergency c section…my heart was just pouring with love and emotions. I felt a love like nothing I could explain. lol I cried when she turned three days old because she was already getting old 🤦🏽‍♀️🤣. For me it felt like my heart was outside of my chest. I then felt guilt that I didn’t buy many clothes but that was sorted after. Surround yourself with love and I’m sure you yourself will be full of joy for your baby x

If your partner abuses you, you don’t have a partner, you have an abuser.

You’ll be surprised how alone you aren’t. This stopped me leaving an abusive relationship and once I did it didn’t take me long I had been living in a dark hole that prevented me from connecting with anything and everything. I didn’t even recognise myself. You will find support, no one is truly alone, it’s our minds that make us think so.