Cry it out?

I did when my (now 16 year old) daughter was 8 months. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t leave her bawling for hours. I would pop into her nursery a couple of times to reassure her, but it literally took 3 nights and we were sorted x

We tried it once and it led to a breath holding incident where my son turned blue. Never again after that.

I don't and will never. I just do book, cuddle, rock for 5 minutes sit for 10 minutes and put down. She sleeps for about 4 hours before we co sleep

When I weaned my son it was the only choice. He would be so angry and I could not give in anymore. We tried cuddling him and rocking him but he’d literally tint us so we ignored him either caution and he’d cry it out and would wake up perfectly fine the next day. I believe crying can be good for anyone. It just depends

It works because eventually the baby realises no one is coming to soothe them. 😔

But how true is it really that they just give up? Baby has settled in 10 mins or less each night. He could cry and fuss for longer than that in my arms usually 🤷‍♀️ I’d never leave him for hours, but as I said a moment of desperation. I’ve spent the last few weeks thinking about how I don’t want to be here anymore. The exhaustion was just too much. Hourly wakes and bedtime taking 3+ hours. Sometimes enough is enough and desperate measures need to happen.

I’m no expert but I’m sure 10 mins of fuss won’t have a detrimental impact on your baby. Exhaustion is real and also needs to be considered because it can start to impact on your mental health and then you’re dealing with even more problems. Sounds like you’re doing good to me mumma ❤️

If you find yourself getting overwhelmed and stressed out because of your baby crying try some headphones or ear buds that cancel noise or play music, place baby down and gently soothe them by tapping, rocking gently or shhh-ing them but staying with them. That way they’ll learn to fall asleep without being held all of the time, the earbuds block out the crying which reduces the stress on you and itms still providing them comfort. I do it a lot with daughter at bedtime. She is a great sleeper but sometimes she needs comfort to get off in her cot and this is the only way I canndo it without letting her cry it out, me get stressed (which doesnt help) and get her used to her own sleep space whilst also knowing I’m there to comfort her X

I've done both i don't particularly like the cry it out but it was better than getting angry or frustrated or overwhelmed while holding my baby I needed sleep and I was desperate with my first one. Please do what you need to. If you aren't OK you can't be there for your baby

I tried a modified ferber where baby fusses/chats for about 5 minutes and I go in to soothe and then every 10 mins. I never lengthened those times because he just chilled out on his own & I don’t like him crying. Most of the time I hide on the floor out of sight so I’m nearby if he needs me and in 20 mins (unless he’s hungry) he’s out like a light.

We followed 12 hours sleep by 12 weeks and it involved an element of cry it out. She consistently slept 10 hours by 14 weeks and now sleeps through without waking every night, waking with a beaming smile in the morning and after her nap. Its helping them to learn how to self soothe, not learn that they are not loved and no-one will come if they cry. If anything, as she sleeps so well now, when she does wake up crying we go in straight away as we know there is something that has legitimately upset her, e.g. Nappy leaking or nightmare etc.

Don't do sleep training. It's an evil practice and a form of emotional neglect, which makes it fall under the category of child abuse. It's unnatural for babies to be kept away from their mother for long periods of time. There is no scientific evidence to back anything that pro-sleep-trainers have to say. Self-soothing along with the ability to self-feed and self-change are skills children learn as they get older.

@Kianna🇨🇴 maybe you need to put yourself into the baby's shoes. As a fully grown adult, would you allow your partner or friends to say "ignore her cries, she needs to learn to be independent" when you are upset and need comfort and reassurance?

@Sara uh yeah? Sometimes I do need to cry and be alone. As an adult that was obviously a baby, I don’t need to regress and put myself “in a baby’s shoes.” It’s weird how normalized cry shaming has been lately. It’s normal to cry. Not everything is child abuse. It’s so toxic and bad to categorize this as child abuse. Save the word child abuse for actual children being abused. Stop watering down the word child abuse!

@Sara evil? for 10 minutes of crying? If you were driving on the motorway and baby was crying - they could be crying a lot longer than ten minutes, is this neglect? I can assure you it is not child abuse or neglect. We exclusively contact nap in the day, my baby has all the comfort he needs. And in 4 nights is able to put himself to sleep and stay asleep. He needed the extra help to figure it out.

People have gone wayyyyyyyy too far with this. It is insane. Babies fuss sometimes when they're settling or between sleep cycles. It is completely normal. It is not evil and will not hurt them. What does hurt them is when people just leave their babies to cry for extended periods of time. But ten minutes is just normal settling. It is a completely normal behavior that people have gone crazy with.

What else can emotional neglect be? And anyone on the motorway who literally cannot comfort their child, this does not apply to you. It applies to those who sit there and heartlessly listen to the cries and abstain from picking up their child using their brainwashed mind to justify that evil behaviour

@Sara when a mother’s sanity is on the line due to sleep deprivation, is it really “evil” to let your baby cry for a while in the hope they might eventually settle themselves to sleep? Your choice of words here are really quite questionable 🤨