Testing driving me mad

Please tell me if anybody else is testing everyday and getting obsessed to a point of taking the test strip out of the plastic and using light😪 I have found my tests now look like indent lines and I’m so obsessed with it I then get hope even tho I no it’s more than likely indents. My husband told me as we have 3 children already I should be grateful and stop testing if it happens it will happen🥲 but it don’t stop me from having the urge to keep testing, so now have to do it in secret x