Grandma babysitting
Show your support
I think my MIL should be paid. She does absolutely loads of childcare for my sister and brother in law who are on a high income and until more recent health issues used to even clean their house for them. She isn't particularly comfortable financially so in my eyes they should be giving her some money because she's saved them I don't know how many thousands in childcare, takes the kids on holiday, has them overnight every Friday so parents get a break, takes them out some Sundays etc. They would be lost without her and my FIL. For more infrequent childcare I would hope that any of my daughter's grandparents would be happy to have her without asking for any financial contributions but I would at the very least get a present to show how grateful we were.
Random here and there short term babysitting, no. Extended babysitting for long periods of time yes! My mother isn’t wealthy and she isn’t retired so if I ask her to care for my kids for multiple days it’s a lot so I will usually buy her meals, and get her something she wants but won’t buy herself. She doesn’t like when I give her cash.
My mum used to be my source of childcare when I worked so nearly every weekend - I would always overpack essentials for them to have at their house - My MIL wouldn’t ever ask for money but I still overpack essentials just incase 🤣🤷🏻♀️
No. If they watched her every week I would offer. But they watch her once a month, if that. The last time the watched her was 6 weeks ago. I just ask if theyre free and would like to hang with her for an hour or 2. That day I'll cook something and send them a plate or I'll make a sweet treat and send over a batch.
They would never accept payment even if we tried. Instead we just order in lunch or dinner as a thank you.
My MIL watches my son every day for free but if we ask her to watch him extra like for date nights or anything then we pay her Other grandparents that don't normally see him "babysit" for free because that is bonding time with their grandson
No. I believe on taking care of your parents. I send money all the time, simply because they are my parents. But specifically for childcare, no. All money given to them is because they are my parents. All childcare help rendered is because they are their grandchildren.
No however it was the odd day during the summer holidays not permanent childcare. I used to do it for free for my brother but felt like I was being taken advantage of especially as he sold it that he’d be able to help me out but never did.
Mom/in laws dont baby sit but if they did I would pay them if it was daily, all day and they were feeding, teaching, taking to activities (if they were taking kiddos in place of daycare/nanny)
MIL asked for £950 a month for one day a week 9-3 but watches her other granddaughter 7-6 five days a week for free 🤣
No, its not something that we do in our culture. Family supports family for free. Unless im leaving my child with someone for 3 months or something, i would provide everything they might need and give them money in case of an emergency. Even though i know they will never use my money. When i was a child, i lived with my grandparents for 5 months while my parents were abroad. My parents didnt give a penny to my grandparents. They just took care of me as if i was their own and gave me an allowance everyday.
Both my mom and my MIL live out of state, so usually they're either coming out to visit to take care of her or im flying out with my daughter to see them. If they come out to us, we get their flights and get them dinner and they use our vehicle to go adventure with our daughter, and we often help with hotels/airbnb if they dont want to stay at our place (if im going away with my fiance, they usually stay at our apartment, but if they're just coming out to visit then our apt is too small unfortunately), take them out to dinner, etc. As much as they will allow tho, cuz to both of them, spending time with their granddaughter is "all the payment they need" (their words lmao). Im actually working things out with my fiance to book my MIL a trip to the carribean, and my parents a trip to somewhere overseas (im thinking italy cuz my mom has always dreamed of going), as thanks for all they've done to help us since having our daughter (my fiance has so many travel points from his job its awesome)!
No. My MIL watches my son half day per week. That's something we offered for her to spend time and bond with our child. We could definitely not count on that help and I would absolutely never want my child know I ve being paying his grandmother for her to spend time with him.
Nope, but if my mum want to take my daughter to soft play or something like that then I will pay for that. She knew before I had a baby that she would be child care. She nagged me for the last 10 years to have a baby. And I told her numerous times we couldn't afford nursery full time and she said she would have them. And I am now keeping her to those words said year after year.
to connect with women at a similar stage in life.
Trusted by 5M+ women
to connect with women at a similar stage in life.
Trusted by 5M+ women
No, both sides would be insulted if we even offered. But for their birthdays, Mother’s Day, Christmas we get them very nice gifts as a thank you and for our appreciation.
Like an occasional thing? Or a scheduled think every week while you work? For an occasional thing no. But if it is an all the time thing then I think you should pay
I wish they would babysit and we would pay them but neither of them wanna give up their lives to watch our LO full time.
Not for babysitting, but if they were providing regular childcare while we were working then I would at least offer.
My mum and dad watch my 2 children every Friday 7-12 when I’m working. I’ve offered to pay them but they didn’t want it, as it’s the time for them to spend with their grandchildren.
If full time watching my baby I would but less of a “salary” and more as a money gift since any scenario of my parents/in laws babysitting that often would mean they’re retired. For 1-offs I wouldn’t “pay” my parents or in laws nor would we ever have a discussion like that. But I would show them thanks and appreciation whether with some cash/gift card/dinner periodically to enjoy.
I really think this depends on the situation. How often is she looking after her grandchild(ren)? Is she still able to do things? Does she work? Personally if it’s once a week you could be let off but I think if she’s looking after her grandchild often then I think a bit of money should be paid 🤷♀️
We don't pay my mom but try to do favors for her like mow the lawn or small repairs around her house
If it’s a few times a month or less no, but if I asked my mom to be my primary childcare I would expect to pay her.
My mom never put a price, but I still gave her some $. Kids are A LOT of work, no matter who takes care of them
If I was having my mom or MIL as my nanny while I was working, yes, I'd probably pay her. But for one-off baby sitting, no, and she'd never ask.
I said no my mom wouldn’t ask. She wouldn’t but she also isn’t allowed to watch them. We are no contact with her. But my mother in law also never asks either. She asks us to go out more so she can watch them lol
my dad sometimes babysits for a little bit and I don't have to pay him, he never asks me to pay him. he just rlly loves getting to spend some time with his grandson
For my working week yes, I pay her and do food shop. But for ad hoc nights out/date nights etc then no.
No my MiL just looks after my boy for a couple hrs when we go on monthly date nights we don’t pay her no. It’s babysitting not childcare in our case. She lives w us 😂
to connect with women at a similar stage in life.
Trusted by 5M+ women
to connect with women at a similar stage in life.
Trusted by 5M+ women
No. Every family has a different dynamic but we are blessed with the support that both of our parents provide when it comes to being in the life of our kids. When I had my first daughter my MIL and mom would alternate their days off to take care of the baby since I didn’t feel safe leaving her at a daycare at 3 months old. Now that I leave in a different state with a second baby they would come to visit during school year and take them for the summer. It was hard at first she would go only go for 3 or four weeks but after Covid I had to leave her for 3 months since my fiancée and I had to work until I got remote job. After that it was an expectation that it was okay to stay for the whole summer. I would send money and they would get mad and just give it all back to my oldest for her birthday.
When my mum first started having my first, we offered to pay her- especially as she buys nappies, wet wipes and provides all of their food- even if it was just a small supplement for that. She absolutely insisted she would not take anything from us. I understand we are extremely lucky for this to be the case and can completely appreciate why you would compensate someone, even if it’s your parent/child’s grandparent, for looking after your child. Life is not cheap but she saved us an awful lot of money in childcare which we will always be thankful for 🙌🏻
I said no, but if it’s one offs for like a date night, no. But, if they are your main childcare support instead of nursery, absolutely, not because they will have asked, but because it feels like the right thing to do for me as it’s WORK.
Yes, my mom is my childcare during the work week. I figured I’m still making off cheaper than daycare. My mom is a nurse and works night so I feel it’s only right to compensate as it’s an extended shift not just babysitting a few hours. We will be hiring a nanny soon but for the first 6 months didn’t feel comfortable with someone we didn’t know.