Am I being overly optimistic?

I have a 2.5 year old and I thought can't be that bad I've had one before I know what I'm doing. I have been humbled so hard. It's the hardest thing I've ever done and I cry a lot, they're 6 months now. BUT your other child is older than mine was (he was 2 when they were born) and every baby is different. Mine struggle with sleep and are quite hard work in many ways. I know people who have had twins that say they're great sleepers etc. it's so hard to prepare for but I'm sure you'll find your groove xx

I have the easiest twins in the world. Even with them being as good, calm and sweet as they are I struggle some days. It is doable without being miserable but it will vary child to child and parent to parent. I ONLY have twins and think having another child ontop would be a lot to handle, however a child that is close with you and is as old as yours is might make your life easier by helping you, involve them in tasks with the twins so she they loving and protective of them instead of jealous by the attention shifting. Keep in mind when your first born cried or needed something you only had one child to tend to and there will be times when both twins need you and that in itself is overwhelming. I don’t think your expectations are unrealistic, there are good times and bad times with everything but with a calm happy go lucky attitude having twins is the BEST thing ever! 🥰

I think I'm being naive to how hard it will be but feel this is the best way. Got to embrace it.

My twins are 5 months, a 2.5 year age gap, 1 very poorly twin who needed surgery and a nicu stay, 2 house moves in 2 months, no childcare for the eldest for 2 months and a partner who gets home from work at 8. I’m still standing, and also now really enjoying them. Twins are hard, the nights are hard with 2 (or 3) who need you, it’s hard spreading yourself between all 3, BUT you will be absolutely fine. You’ve done it before, you know what you’re doing. Routine makes life so much easier, I never had one with my first and I didn’t in the beginning with the twins because we were split between hospital but since they have feeds and nappies at the same time like is a million times easier, we’re still working on simultaneous naps. Honestly, I’ve found the twins easier than I found my first just because the whole first time mum anxiety isn’t there. It’s totally doable, you’ve got this. All this is coming from someone who’s worst nightmare was twins and cried sad tears when I found out xx

Like every baby, it’s a matter of temperament (luck I guess?) Ours were very good sleepers because we put them to sleep in the same bassinet at the start. They never wanted to sleep on me! And once they slept well the other things felt easy I guess. They’re our first so I can’t compare but I feel like our 2 were easier than others 1. Plan for the worst. Hope for the best 😅

My son just turned two today and I'm having twin boys in 38 days or less. I'm not scared of having twins, I've had a newborn before and as long as I can keep them in the same schedule I'm sure I can handle it, but I am scared of having a toddler while taking care of twins 😬

I think it is entirely dependent on your expectations of how your multiple roles in life look like, and what you’re “happy with” your life functioning like. Get that right and I think you’ll be absolutely fine. I have 14 month old twins and I love it, and incredibly happy. (Granted I don’t have any other children.) I don’t find it exceptionally hard, there are the difficult days, but I wouldn’t expect any different being a twin mum. Keep your optimism burning ❤️

Thanks for your responses everyone, I guess I’ll only find out once they’re here for sure! I can’t seem to dim the optimism though so I may be in for a shock awakening once they’re born 😂

As above, it's your mindset and expectations plus the support you have. My eldest was 3 when twins were born, I am lucky enough not to be an anxious person and I'm generally confident as a mum (not that I'm an incredible mum just that I don't agonise over decisions and find it quite instinctive). My partner does his mostly equal share and our twins slept ok after wanting to lie on me for a few months... having said all of that it's by far the hardest thing I've done. I felt really sad about basically having to ignore my eldest for first year of the twins' lives. I can rationalise it now (they're 2.5) but it was very tough. Now they play together well and really love each other which is incredible. However, 1 of the twins is a biiiig fan of tantrums which is so hard when you're also keeping an eye on 2 other children. Go into it with realistic expectations and you'll be fine x

My eldest was a few weeks short of 4 when the twins arrived. I never really had any apprehension either and if I’m honest they’ve just kind of fitted in with life. Whether it’s because my first was a lockdown baby or because they’re not the first I don’t know but they’ve been easier than the first

I have a 4 year old and 9 month old twins. Hands down my twins have been easier, I’m way more chilled being a second time mum and in turn, so are they. First few months were rough but we have CMPA to deal with but both girls slept through from 10 weeks and of course, have their moments but it’s nothing on the fear people so desperately tried to give me. You’ve got this 👌🏻

Stay optimistic and take every day as it comes❤️ I was very optimistic when I found out I was twins and it definitely made me just focus on what was important and keep on top of things whilst they were babies. The first few months are a shock and the attention they need is honestly insane. Its not just about doing everything twice its physically exhausting and the bigger the get the harder they get to manage. Mine were very 'easy' babys Now they are 2 I am busy like 5 times more than when they were babies. But theres always good moments throughout the day. Id say dont under estimate just how hard it gets but enjoy when things go well and you can get through it

I had my twins in February and have a 5 year old, I wouldn't say its hard and your not being naive. Some days are better then others. I'm struggling with my 5 year old more but think its due to her being the only child for 5 years and now she has a brother and sister all of a sudden. I manage to do the school run and get us all out and ready on time and haven't been late for school yet so I think that's a win 😂 you will be fine 💪🏻 you got this 😊 xx

Your eldest will be able to entertain the twins, stay optimistic☺️good and boy days/weeks😂but it's all doable and mostly enjoyable. When its hard it can get on top but hard times are ALWAYS temporary. My only regret is i was so overworked with basic care n smiles i didnt work on my twins social/communication development or education and then before i knew it they were 2 being assessed like crazy! Now ill be catching up for the next 3 years. But other than that its been really good n i think my two would of benefitted loads from an older sibling xx From a sleep deprived toddler twin mom xx