Can’t control anger

I hate it but I get angry at my 2.5 year old more than I care to admit. I can’t seem to control my emotions when my toddler is screaming and throwing a tantrum. I keep reminding myself that it’s normal and I need to help them through this stage but it’s always too late. I don’t scream at him or anything but I do tell him off. I don’t help the situations. How can I control my emotions better to help my son control his?? 😭😭

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I’ve read somewhere that if you feel like shouting, try whispering instead. I have a lot of patience and can luckily deal with tantrums calmly but sometimes children respond well to whispering.

You’ll probably find that as a child you were met with similar responses from those around you when you were upset. It’s really hard to break that trigger feeling as it’s like an automatic response but the starting point is to notice it and to want to change it!

I’m also in a situation of regular tantrums and I also have a 3.5 month old who has his own challenges. It’s that things of ‘we parent how we were parented’ so totally trying to break that cycle. I get so frustrated with so much going on and I make situations worse also. What I find though is I get to a certain point and I have to almost shake myself because I’m arguing with a child who clearly is upset. At this point is discuss with my daughter about how I’m sorry and I shouldn’t have acted that way etc. I will give her plenty cuddles but reassure her that it wasn’t ok to act that way and explain my emotions behind it. Usually it instantly defuses the situation. It’s really helped her understand her own emotions so there has been some good come out of it. I think as parents we need to give ourselves grace. We aren’t perfect and aren’t ever going to be but as long as we do our very best to break these cycles we will get there. Just try and validate his feelings and go from there x

@Alex I’m going to try this. I don’t really raise my voice often but I snap a lot when I’m overstimulated and I hate it 😢

I always just sit down in front of my LB when he's having a tantrum and pretty much every time he sits on my legs leans on my chest and cries. I rub his back and tell him I get that (he wanted his toy, a snack close to having a main meal, screen time ect) but (we needed to leave the house, we were about to eat, he's had enough screen, ect) and I rock him to calm him down

Reading this and you are not alone mama! It is so hard to try and regulate our own emotions we're only human! But I always apologise to my LO if I've raised my voice or shouted a bit more and explain my reasoning behind it but you recognised you feel that way that makes you a good parent! We're all learning along the way and trying to break cycles and regulate ourselves too. You're doing great mama give yourself some grace but so important to apologise and rebuild that relationship it's okay not to be okay sometimes. I'm sure you're doing the best u can! I'm in the same boat where I beat myself up with snapping or maybe shouting louder than usual it's a hard stage ❤️

@Alex I'm going to try this too! Thanks for advice just reading what u said as I'm dealing with similar atm and I'm normally quite calm and respond well but always open to trying harder ❤️

@Samantha u seem so lovely🥹 I loved your comment ❤️

@Alex Thankyou lovely 💗 you had similar advice too! We’re all in this together 🥰

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