So I have been with my partner for 12 years. We are in our late 20’s. A long time. We have sex often, but Rarely will he do something more, but he knows I like spankings, handcuffs, blindfold, and some choking. I recently made a sex game. Where basically it’s a bunch of sex ideas, some bingos with locations and positions in our house, yes sex days, strip teases, new lingerie, role play ideas, etc all on a bunch of slips and the idea originally was to do one a week. He has a high sex drive and so do I. But since I made this? It’s like he doesn’t want to touch me at all. I don’t know if I’ve offended him by planning something like this. Or if hes getting off himself? Or something else? What could I have done? Suggest more? We both enjoy sex.
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Have you talked to him about it to see what’s going on?

Sounds a little emasculated. Masculine energy involves initiation, and the game you created takes the initiation and puts the game in charge. It was a nice idea as you clearly like to keep things interesting, but my advice would be scrap this one to respect his needs. He probably doesn't even understand himself what's put him off. It's just a masculine need, and it's a good sign of the masculine energy he has for you

I said emasculated, not emasculating. To each their own. Having masculine needs is proof of masculine energy - that doesn't mean or imply when a man likes women who initiate they're any less masculine

Love that you shared some ideas. I can only speak for myself and my husband.. we're tired lol and barely have time alone. Certainly not enough time or energy to engage in all that. So if my husband shared that with me, he'd probably be left wondering why I haven't initiated. It's because that all sounds like a lot of work 😅 maybe you two should plan a night away and see if the change of scenery and actually having time to spend on more foreplay allows for new things to happen?

Maybe he just finds the idea of it being a game daunting and less spontaneous. Perhaps the game adds a bit more pressure to it

I think it was a great idea but you and him have different ideas about what is fun sexually. He should do it for you once in awhile. I understand if he doesn't want to choke you never you have to do it right or you could really hurt the person. Maybe he could just put his hand around your throat and not squeeze I know that isn't as fun for you but I got nervous when I've had guys all me to come them. I didn't want to accidentally hurt them. He should do this things sometimes to make you happy actual sex isn't just about what he likes. What about your needs?

I've got nervous when guys have asked to to choke them. Typo. I don't feel comfortable doing it. But the other things I don't understand why he wouldn't do that for you sometimes. I had a bf that wouldn't take me by force. I told him I wanted him to surprise me and grab me and push me into the bed and have his easy with me and he wouldn't do it. I was so frustrated so I get where you're coming from.
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I'm at the end of my pregnancy absolutely huge just want my body back so wanting a good hard fuck lol any suggestions on positions

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it feels like this entire pregnancy he’s been pushing every boundary i’ve asked for. when i first found out i was pregnant initially i said no telling anyone until 12weeks. but i was so sick so my parents who live near us would come drop off food regularly so they found out i was pregnant around 6 weeks bc i was hospitalized. i asked him to wait to tell his parents until after first trimester though bc of risk of MC and i don’t really have a relationship with them and so was really anxious. he kept fighting me about that but ended up not telling them.
then a few months ago he insisted they be present for the birth even though i asked for a few weeks to recover. that was another huge fight because he said they’re also grandparents they should be here when the baby’s born. i tried explaining there are very few people i want around me when im bleeding and leaking everywhere but he kept saying it’s not fair they’re grandparents too even when i tried to explain its not about the baby it’s about ME.
Ive tried compromising ive tried saying ok they can come but they need to stay in a hotel but its apparently disrespectful to ask his mom to stay elsewhere and he keeps going back to “fair”. Is it fair i had severe hospitalization nausea for 16 weeks? Is it fair i cant sleep bc i get up to pee 6x a night? I’m the one growing the child I have to recover while learning to breastfeed (something HE wants, id happily do formula) and learning to keep a tiny human alive.
I’m 1 month from delivering and we keep having these fights. I said ok let me see how i’m feeling post birth then we can decide when his parents come (how long they need to wait) but even that’s not okay. It’s like if i don’t decide right now we won’t see them for 4-5 months bc they don’t want to travel in the cold and I feel like that decision is being blamed on me.
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I’m currently 18+4 weeks pregnant and my partner and I have only had sex 3 times since finding out I’m pregnant.
Before we started trying for the baby, we had such a good sex life. However since being pregnant, my mind and body wants two different things. I crave sex and I’m having dreams and all sorts but when it comes to it.. I’m just so dry.. nothing turns me on, even the things that always work. I just wondered if this is normal? He thinks I’m not wanting it but I generally do, my body is just saying something different.
Any advice is welcome!
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