• Michelle
  • ENG, GB
  • 11 months ago

Big boys don’t cry, be a good girl 🤦‍♀️

Are there any phrases which your parents used to say to you which you now find yourself using and feel badly about? I caught myself saying “big boys don’t cry” the other say, and immediately felt upset that I’d used such a horrible gender specific cliche. Tell me some others to watch out for!...
  • M
  • Pueblo, United States
  • 11 months ago

Boys who aren't allowed to cry grow up to be men who can't comfortably express emotions other than anger 😢 I'm glad to see so many moms recognizing these ingrained things and working to change. I have a daughter and I catch myself telling her that I have to clean or cook because it's a "moms job" which is problematic. I'm also working to get rid of "you're okay/that's enough" as a response to certain crying episodes as I think it's really healthiest to let her have and echoes her emotions (without getting wrapped up in them myself).

  • L
  • 11 months ago

We need to teach our kids to be kind and sympathetic but not so sensitive and easily offended. Reading these comments has me like 🤦🏼‍♀️ We don’t want to raise weak kids, we want strong level headed people.

  • n
  • NIR, GB
  • about 1 year ago

Remember my mum used to say to me, shut up or I'll give u something to cry about, 'just wait till I get you home' amongst other stuff lol I'd never say nothing like this to my child amongst other things that used to be said to me

  • H
  • Escalon, United States
  • over 1 year ago

In our family we say cowboys and cowgirls don’t cry.. it’s not necessarily gender specific.. so i don’t see anything wrong with it

  • L
  • Phoenix, United States
  • over 1 year ago

I found that I don’t like saying “You’re okay!” or “It’s okay!”, when it clearly wasn’t okay.

  • E
  • Prince George, United States
  • over 1 year ago

I like “shake it off” when the kiddo is hurt. Then we’re both shaking whatever body part got hurt and they start laughing (especially when my daughter bit her tongue and we are trying to shake our tongues in the air). It diffuses the situation without invalidating the fact that they did get hurt.

  • R
  • OH, US
  • over 1 year ago

I saw this sort of poster the other day with suggestions for other things to say. https://www.reddit.com/r/beyondthebump/comments/av3ww1/what_i_try_to_think_about_when_my_boy_is_crying/

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