I don’t have that problem but I will tell you one thing. They are only little for so long and then after they grow and don’t want to be held. If you have to do something have him used to seeing you, talk or sing to him so he knows your around. I just relax when he’s asleep on my arms and sometimes he allows me to lay him down on the couch or bed. But if he doesn’t I don’t stress just hug and kiss him and if you can’t do something now you can try later. Don’t stress to do everything at that moment just because.
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Maybe she’s more hungry. Don’t let her cry because then they know to cry when they need anything. When I give my baby his bottle I mix a bit of baby rice cereal or baby oatmeal a small spoon. Helps them get full.
Does she have colic? Spits a lot? Maybe reflux. My 8 weeks old doesn’t like sleeping flat due to his reflux. He sleeps on rock n play, swing, or my lap.
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She used to spit up a lot but we switch her formula and also have her sleep on her boppy pillow or tilted so it’s less likely.
My baby does this too, he’s almost never happy unless being held. I started to introduce toys that are bright, light up and make noise that distract him from me putting him down, and it seems to work! I also put him in a bouncy seat that has vibration to it and that usually works too!! I wouldn’t suggest CIO method, personally I think it’s a little cruel but that’s just me. I co-sleep so I say cuddle that baby to bed!
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I can’t do the CIO either. I tried it last night and I last one minute. I literally looked at the time is was 4:59am. I looked again because it feel like 10 minutes and it was only 5:00am. I gave in. She fell asleep on my chest and when I was ready to put her down, I used the boppy. She loves that thing.
It could be the purple cry period. http://purplecrying.info
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Honestly thank you. Because the doctor has ruled out colic but she cries during the night most night and just fights it.
I hope it passes soon! My baby had this phase as well, nothing we did seamed to help and it sucked. Also get the baby wonder weeks app. It is also helpful information about the stages of baby development.
It sounds like it could be reflux! My daughter cried almost 24/7 except for when eating or sleeping until she was 9 months old because of it and even still it occurred more than “normal” until after a year old.
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We were told by 3 doctors my daughter was healthy and no reflux because she had a healthy weight too, not all reflux babies are underweight. It wasn’t until we got a referral to a GI specialist that we were able to get a doctor educated enough to help with the reflux and get it under control! I hope you get some relief soon though! It’s so hard to stay sane with a crying baby all the time!
My doctor says she’s healthy as can be. No reflux. No colic. He originally had some concern because she would spit up a lot but she’s always been at a healthy weight so it wasn’t too much of a concern
When my son was little he would take 45min to 1 hour naps. If he was on my arms he would sleep longer. So sometimes during the say I would sit on the couch sort of reclined with a pillow on my back with my son sleeping on my chest. He would sleep 4 hours straight if I let him!!! And I would relax and watch whatever tv show I wanted.
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Okay I need to say that the problem is more at night. During the day she will sleep all day if she wants to or pay for an hour and sleep for 2-3. But at night it’s hard.
So first of all, agree here that spoiling a 6 month old is not a thing! I also want to suggest that maybe your baby has some reflux, or possibly a dairy allergy. My daughter has a dairy and soy allergy and it took us a couple months to figure it out and she was absolutely miserable and would only sleep when we were holding her too. I’d definitely ask to be referred to a specialist!
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I wasn’t specific with my post. She only cries at night. She can sleep most of the day. Which makes it hard for me to get anything done. My doctor has ruled out colic and reflux. We’ve switch her formulas to sensitive to ensure that.
Baby wearing is a good idea! Peek-a-Boo type games help with the separation anxiety. I have one lol and she is 16 months now 🤭 She has taught me the joys of carrying a baby all the time 🙄 Sleep training is not the same as CIO (I could never do that). But I have: 1. put them to bed the same time, same place 2.all lights out 3. after 1 minute of crying, console them and lay them down again. 4. Keep at it for a couple weeks, increasing the length of time I let them cry
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She’s just so young that she refuses to get into a system. whenever we first brought her home it was easier because she really didn’t do anything other an sleep and I would wake her up every three hours to eat. As she became a month or so, the routine went away. I just made sure she ate every two hours, if she was awake. If not, my doctor said to let her sleep. Which is fine because at 2 months she was already 13 pounds. But anyways from there it just became a mess and the routine was lost. Now when we try she acts like she starving. ):
Hi I have to say my first child was very similar, baby carrying is a life saver! The upright position will provide comfort if they have reflux and help them burp better. And if you are breastfeeding you can offer your little one the breast whenever they are upset as breast milk can calm them down immediately. If she cries in distress when you lay them flat in bed with or without spilling that might be reflux or silent reflux. The good thing is they do grow out of reflux from 7 months onwards. Also check their dirty nappy if there is green bloody stool that might be food intolerances. Cry it out is not recommended for under 6 months old as they simply not mature enough to understand what it means. Be there for them as you are their no.1 support person.
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Thank you so much. My doctor has ruled out reflux and we’ve also changed her formula to the sensitive version. I don’t like the CIO because the research I’ve done supports your statement. It can actually make their separation anxiety worse because they don’t know when we’re coming back. & without time concept they think we’re leaving forever. I try to be with her as much as possible.
Oh wait a minute, just re read what your topic is, so she is only crying at night, so the baby carrier is not going to work. Is it possible to have her in your room? They do recommend baby in the same room with you guys for the first 6 months. Have you tried have the same nap time routine to the bed time routine? Put her down drowsy but not asleep so that they can see u leaving the room so she isn’t surprise and cry when she wake up and realize you ain’t there? Playing baby Mozart durung sleep time relaxes them too! Good luck!
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She co sleeps with me. We also play music for her and yes, but she gets upset to where she stops for a second, and then starts screaming louder. It’s beyond frustrating. I feel as if I’m failing as a mother.
Don’t beat yourself up just yet. Do you think she is in pain? Or is it just a loud scream than fall back to sleep?
Bouncing on a fit ball always stopped my bub crying and put her to sleep quite quickly!
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Yes they do you can use a birthing ball that’s what I used
Do they make them for plus sized moms? 😅
I'm in almost the same position 👍 my LO is just gone 3 months, but spent her whole life in my arms basically, bed sharing/baby wearing/etc, whatever to get her asleep (she slept well overnight however, and bad during the day). I'm actually at a sleep school thing now to help with her. What they had me do was feed her, then from start to finish max 1hr (so she could feed, 45 min break, feed again, etc) then play for about 30 min or so (so shes awake 1-2 hours and put her in the bassinett, swaddled with the noise machine on, once she started showing tired signs like red eyes, grumpy face, grizzling, unfocused. They got me to rock the bassinett (on wheels) until she fell asleep (if she wasn't crying - if she was and wouldn't start settling I could cuddle her calmer). Then she had to nap for at least 2 sleep cycles (1hr+, I needed to resettle her to get it) then start again. Since being here shes stuck to roughly a 2.5-3 hour routine during the day,
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My daughter is the complete opposite. She will sleep fine during the day. It’s at night. It’s like god forbid we finish her bath because from that moment forward it’s an uphill battle. ):
(Oops) and overnight as well. I obviously had a nurse to help with the rocking, but shes a lot happier between sleeps and it helps me keep track of how much she's sleeping (she would stay awake for 3+hrs before this 😴) but I could finally put her down, at least for a bit 😅 I hate listening to her cry, so it's a much nicer way of still actively settling, just not touching or leaving her alone at all. (Alone, I last like 30 min against her refusing to sleep, so started bed sharing pretty quickly 😅)
Have you tried a dreamer? It keeps babies at an angle, and can help with colic or gas. My babies weren’t colicky either, but the dreamer was magic for my first! Placed him on it while swaddled- down like a rock!
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Thank you! We use a boppy and that tends to help sometimes, but maybe the dream will work better
Does she sleep on you at nap time during the day?
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That’s how she falls asleep, yes.
Mommy's bliss the nighttime gripe water was a go to in my house for a few months, it helped so much.
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I’m going to try it! Hopefully that will help her 😩
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I had this same issue with my daughter. She slept fine during the day and would be so fussy at night and only wanted me to hold her. I figured she had her days and nights confused so i kept the lights on during the day and played with her a lot and at night i made sure it was dark and i didn’t stimulate her at all. She has a warm bath every night and then i give her a warm bottle and play sounds of running water until she falls asleep. She still wanted me next to her but i didn’t have to hold her. She doesn’t need the running water sound anymore but we still do everything else and she’s 10 months. Her routine never changes. There is a 10 hour video on YouTube called running water for babies. It helped with the crying and calmed her down. I hope this helps.
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Thank you so much! We tried a routine and then we stopped but maybe if we actually stick to it she’ll understand it’s bed time. Because I think that’s what she’s experiencing right now. He days and night are mixed. When I was pregnant I worked all day and came home around 11/12 at night and she’d be up moving around. So I think that’s what happened.
Also when we bathe her she really enjoys it but hates getting out of the tub. She’ll cry the entire time we’re drying her off, putting lotion, and oil. We always make sure the a/c is off, all fans, and we even turn on the heater. I’m always worried I’m hurting her but the moment I pick her up she stops crying. Hope you have some advice. Thanks in advance!!
Try gripe water before each feeding. It will soothe her and she will most likely fall asleep during the feeding. Don’t rule out acid reflux and see another doctor. My baby has been on allementum since 3.5 months and Zantac and he’s almost 8 months. Our first pediatrician was wrong and told us he was fine but clearly he needed a diff formula and an rx.
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That’s so scary that a pediatrician can over look something so serious! Thank you!! I will be sure to look into it
Have you tried Merlin’s magic sleepsuit? My second daughter loved it. As soon as we zipped her up she fell right to sleep. It’s a little weighted so it adds some pressure like a swaddle yet their arms are free to move with the suit. It was a lifesaver for us!
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Yes! My Daughter was not a fan ): but thank you!
She might have colic if shes not constipated if you would like to know a good baby safe tea to solve colic just msg me and I’m more then glad to give you the simple recipe
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They have tested her for everything and according to her pediatrician she doesn’t have anything.
For the first 4 months of my sons life he slept in a rock n’ play. We would stuff his belly with milk and put him in a sleep sack (because he would break out of swaddles) turn on a white noise machine, put him in the rock n’ play and turn on the “vibrate” setting. It worked for a while. Then we coslept for months 4-6. Which killed me. He would only sleep if he was latched on to me, so I got NO sleep. At 6 mos I sleep trained him with a lot of the same things he had been sleeping with already. Started with moving the rock n’ play into his room. And then moved him to the crib about a week afterwards. But we used the same white noise machine and sleep sack, so it was familiar. Luckily within 2 days of the CIO method he started to go down without a fuss. And now his crib is the only place he will sleep. He’s 16 mos rn and he sleeps 11-13 hours straight. Sometimes you just have to try a bunch of random stuff until you find something that works. And you’re not going to spoil your babe, you’re doing your best.👌🏻
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I was taught no crying it out the first 3 months. Baby by a little bed for her in your bed just keep your hand on her. I have a dock a tot enjoy it goes fast
We co sleep but she it’s so hard because she wants us to hold her. By us I mean me because my husband doesn’t help.
We did Ferber Method with our baby (who's now 2 years old) when he was 7 months old. He's been sleeping 12.5 hours straight ever since! If you want any help, I'll totally tell you what worked for us! Good luck! I know it can be so hard but worth the sleep for everyone in my honest opinion.
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I will message you after I get off work! Thank you.
Also was going to add I used a rock n play right next to my bed he loved it I could sleep on my side and when he would do the crying for no reason I would reach over and rub his belly and it helped just knowing I was there
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She likes her rock n play but wants me to stay up rocking her all night
I think she has an attachment to being on arms for sleeping time, for what I understand you mentioned that that's also how you put her to nap during the day so that's it. Kids get used to everything quite quick, and I guess you wanted to have her in arms all the time at the beginning and as a first time parents it happens to all of us. Try to change her habits so she learn what bed time means. I have to say is not going to be easy and you should start during the day (when you have more energy). The only thing she knows for sure now is that if she cries she will get... In my opinion as much as natural you can teach her the better, (no Waters to smooth her temper) Good luck momma!!!
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I’m starting this thing where I let her cry for a little bit. No more than 3 minutes and sometimes she’s just tired and passes out. If she keeps crying I will check everything again. Make sure she’s taken care of typically that’s starting to work
Check out “Taking Cara Babies” newborn class. It was life changing for us. She also has an amazing blog with a lot of helpful info.
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Thank you!
If you find a solution you have to tell me! My girl is 18 months old and she doesn’t sleep at all!! And I feel like I’m going insane.. she has never slept through since she was born 😕
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We have started to bath her with lotion infused with lavender.
Check out takingcarababies.com We took their newborn class. It really helped us learn about what she needs and how to have her put herself to sleep. She also has an Instagram with super helpful tips.
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She is the best! We did her newborn class and 5-24 month class. Life changing!
Does it work for toddlers xx
I use to make a ritual of the night: bath, breastfeeding, no distractions, low voice and low lights. SKIN to SKIN when my baby is crying
Remind yourself, for starters, that this is just a stage. Talk to her pediatrician to make sure she's not having some issue.. And then fall into a routine. About an hour before you know she'll be sleepy, start doing calming activities, such as a bath time wit lavender essential oil to help calm her. Give her a little massage with some lotion. Read or sing to her. Whatever works for calming your baby down... And with the CIO method, the key is you HAVE to be consistent and not give in. Otherwise, it's going to backfire as your baby learns if she just cries long enough, mommy will come. And at her age, expect her to wake up through the night still a little. That's completely normal. And remind yourself you're doing a FINE job, Momma. I know you're discouraged. *hugs* It will get better. If you have an essential oil diffuser, use SleepyIze Essential Oil (young living brand) and diffuse it at night. It may help as well. It helped my little man at least. :) Best wishes sweet momma friend!!
Have you considered hiring a sleep consultant? You're right in the perfect window to help you babe develop great sleeping habits! We did it with our daughter at 4 months and shes such a good sleeper
Have you tried just letting her snuggle next to you so you can both sleep? Baby side rail on the bed highly recommended, of course.
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She is hitting a growth spurt it will stop at four months 😊
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Maybe she has reflux? It gets worse at night and when they lay on their backs for too long they can become pretty uncomfortable (which means no sleep for anyone). Maybe try a wedge in her crib or bassinet. Our son was pretty fussy all night and well all day until we started focusing on treating his reflux.
I agree, all these answers are great you just have to try it all and see what works. Sometimes a bath with lavender scented shampoo works to calm baby. Goodluck mommy hope you find something that works!
Could have reflux gerd or gas. My baby screamed all night every night for 14 months straight. Could be silent reflux.
I went through the same exact thing and let me tell you there’s no such thing as spoiling a 3 month old. They don’t know any better. I figured him sleeping with me wasn’t that bad until I found a rock and play (fisher price) it rocks on its own for 6hours. It saved my sanity. Transitioning him to the crib was easy. Keep your head up! You can get through this.
Honestly, all of these answers are correct and all very helpful. Ultimately, it’s whatever works for you mama. I’ve talked to other parents and the best piece of advice I’ve gotten is that every baby is different. You do what works best for your baby. And remember, there is no such thing as spoiling a baby because you’re holding them so much. Your baby was in your belly for 9-10 months... and now they gotta get used to a new environment... holding them to sleep never hurt anybody.. just make sure to be safe... do what you gotta do mama!
This happened to us. Go see your paediatrician and have baby checked before you start anything. Ours told us our baby was healthy and to wait a few weeks to see if it was a phase and when it wasn’t she gave us the ok to sleep train. We tried CIO and it was awful but after a few days we switched to the go in & check style of CIO and that was much easier on everyone. There are still regressions sometimes even now at 18 months but having a plan really helped and knowing there was nothing medically wrong with my baby, we just needed to learn to self soothe for everyone’s sanity, made it do-able... some babies just aren’t good sleepers 🤷♀️ ya get what ya get unfortunately so do your best and good luck!
I hired a sleep consultant at 8 months, and my only regret is not hiring her soon. If you want her contact info, send me a message. I recommend trying to find someone local if you can.
You guys have all been so great and supportive. Thank you so much! God bless all of you and have a safe and warm holiday season. I’ve tried a lot of these methods and some work for a few days and other just don’t work for her. But she has good and bad days. Being that she just turned 4 months I’m sure we have a bit of work to do before she finds a good schedule. But thank you all so much!!
Hey! I’m late to the party. Try taking a shirt you’ve worn and swaddling them with that!
My old roommate suggested the babocush to me if I have issues. She said it worked wonders for them.
It could be a couple things needing to burp or fart. My daughter gets like that sometimes and ive held her and just rub her back to help sooth her.
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Try co sleeping maybe she just wants her mama
ding ding ding
At 4 months my son went through an awful sleep regression and would not sleep. We did CIO method with 5 minute intervals and after a few days he was sleeping so much better and at 8/9 months sleeping 12hours a night. It’s hard in the beginning. You aren’t spoiling your baby, they just want comfort. Do what you want. You know best :) xxx
Is there an update to this? My 2 month old has been off her schedule of sleeping around 9 and mostly through the night so I'm worried this staying up late and waking up a lot is the new norm
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It gets better around 4 months. But for awhile there it was just the norm.
Thanks 😊 she seems to go back and forth so oh well I suppose. Hopefully she does get better
At 3 months old thats normal for your baby to wake and cry through the night.. you shouldnt let thrm cry it out that young to ne anyhow. If your baby falls asleep in you than let them they are little for only so long momma take it all in now you cant spoil a 3 month old ans if its by too much cuddles than so be it lol. Let your self enjoy the cuddles while you rock your baby to sleep. 💙 igbore ones eho say your spoiling them theyre bitter 😂
First of all there’s no way you can spoil a baby...... they were inside of you for 9 months and just want to be close to you Your baby might have colic or gas build up. I’d suggest getting a cosleeper so she can sleep with you but you not have to hold her and it’ll encourage her not to want you to hold her while she sleeps
I know and that’s why I always give in. I’ve done some research and some studies say this and others say that. But I agree with you. I want my daughter to need my as much as possible for as long as possible. I love the connection. I have with my daughter. It’s just very stressful when I can’t sleep, or when she simply cries and cries. I obviously want her to be easier to put to sleep and to cry less so she doesn’t get stress either