Early tantrums!? HELP!

My daughter was doing the same thing! My mother who has been a nanny for 12+ years recommends not telling baby just no but telling her gently, “(Name), don’t do that okay? It’s not nice. How about we do this?” And give her something else to do. Also be very enthusiastic about it and always make sure your daughter is well rested and have the food ready before you put her in her chair. Her “tantrums” have decreased dramatically. I just had to try a little harder to be on top of things. Get a routine/schedule and stick to it.

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Yes same ^ mines was like that too

Download the WonderWeeks app if you don't have it already. Best money spent on an app. It tells you all about where your baby is developmentally and what thy can understand. It tells you when they're having a mental leap and that's when they're more fussy, sleep more, etc. it's dead on balls accurate with my kid, I know exactly when he's gonna be feeling lots of emotions and I am reminded to just be his calm instead of share in the chaos and keep perspective

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I second this. It has helped me tremendously

@Taylor does this app also give suggestions on how to deal with these changing situations? I’m interested in getting it.

My daughter also has a little attitude at 10 months

My son has loads of tantrums. In the beginning I ignored it as adviced by my babydaddy. Considering kids are dealing with big emotions and don’t communicate with words just yet, I find it helpful to talk him through and show understanding. As previously mentioned they learn and mirror our behaviors. If I was crying and being ignored by my family, I would get even more upset too. Therefore not my favorite method. If he does something he knows he is not allowed and gets angry about that, I’ll let him know that and be strict. Distraction is very helpful and works most of the time. If he kicks off very intensely I put him in his cot/crib. It’s his safe place and he calms down within a minute. In the end patience and love is the best combination. And perseverance.

Same my baby will be 9 months old on the 28th she’ll throw tantrums I tell her she can’t do that but she’ll scream and scream to the point she gets boiling hot red then when I calm her down and tell her we can’t throw fit like that she just laughs at me. Another thing she does is she like to scream at 10pm at night and since We live in an apartment we can’t have her doing that so I tell her the same think stop Screaming you can’t do that right now then she’ll Laugh and scream even louder 😂🤦‍♀️

Redirect the energy, not with bribery but with a distraction. It will teach them methods of controlling emotions. No one likes to feel out of control of themselves at any age. Good luck

Mine screams for a min and runs to the door and smacks it with hands, Ignore her and she calms down gets upset when her food has to cook, so I let her help with the microwave and she calms down

Lots of telling/warning what we are going to do next is helpful. Doesn’t eliminate but definitely reduced tantrums here. The more you can repeat it the better. “We are going to the car in a few minutes “ “ok we are going to the car” “mommy is opening the car door and you will sit in your car seat now” like for everything you do all day lol it’s annoying and I forget to do it sometimes but they do understand a lot more than we think and this has helped a lot for us and for other friends of mine with strong willed children.

Have you tried baby ASL? I used Pinterest, google, baby asl books, and YouTube to figure out some basics. I think it helped avoid a lot of tantrums to be able to acknowledge that she needs to wait or for her to tell me she wants help or is all done. We also say goodbye to things before we transition to the next activity. Lastly, I tell mine she needs to comply or after I count down from 5 I help her. For example with the car seat I tell her she can sit nicely or I’ll “help” her (aka I’ll make her sit and clip her in regardless). I think warning her and giving her time has helped. I also talk or sing through our really tough things (diaper changes). I tell mine what we’re gonna do (&sign it), and then say ok, now I’m going to lay you down. Now I’m going to take off your diaper. She knows what’s coming and when I’m busy talking it helps me calm and breathe! Take a deep breath Mama cause this too shall pass (hopefully fast and smoothish!). Good luck!

Reflect her frustration or whatever it is you think she is feeling and redirect her attention -if you can. By Reflecting how she feels you are teaching her to identify her emotions as well as teaching her how to communicate

I have been ignoring bad behavior and praising good behavior

Remember that that's their only way of communicating at this age. Be kind and gracious. Tell baby "mommy will feed you in five minutes." Or "you have to go in the car seat so we can gobble-bye!" Don't get angry, keep your calm and it will rub off on them. ❤️

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That should say "go bye-bye" not "gobble-bye!"

I have a 3 m.o and she does the same. I asked the doctor if it was normal for her to do that or if it’s something I’m doing wrong and she just told me she is high maintenance smh.

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I was told the same about my boy. He started having tantrums very early. He’s 8 months now... still high maintenance, but a lot easier to manage.

ASL. I started early on to avoid “tantrums” children at any age are all just tiny humans trying to figure out life. Imagine not being able to express your feelings are talk. I would throw tantrums to. I’m what people call a gentle parent or conscious parent. So I don’t believe in ignoring them, or telling them they look silly and or that people think they look silly. I wouldn’t want to teach my kid to care what others think about him or her expressing feelings/frustrations. But I’m glad that works for some people! I’m a big believe in doing what works for you and only you. As long as it isn’t abuse lol. But I recommend ASL. I got a book from amazon 101 baby sign language. It’s great. I would personally whenever she has a tantrum to just stop get at eye level and say “I’m sorry your feeling this way, give her a hug if she lets you and let her cry/ scream. Tell her you understand she’s frustrated. And that you love her. And if she calms down a bit say okay are ready to go on a adventure” or whatever it is...

Couldn’t hurt to try. But definitely ASL helps

I have 9mo and she pulls her hair, ears and scratches her face off so I have to hold her hands every time I tell her no

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Omg yes and lately she swings her head all the way to the back and throws herself to the ground. One thing I started doing was I hold her hand when she’s swinging and let her down to the ground gently and step aside, it kind works

I am going thru the same thing with my son he tests the waters forsure but he will and will always be disappointed when he dont get his way.

Following!! Because I'm going through terrible 1s i dont even want to know what terrible 2s will be like

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Horrible girl lol straight horrible 🤣🤣🤣 I have a 2 year old and a 1 year old.

My baby is 5 months and shes the same but I find it funny, it's her clinching her wee fists as I'm changing her nappy, putting her n her car seat and the frustrated noises she makes, I actually cant help but laugh and in actual fact when I'm laughing at loud at her reactions she immediately stops doing it and this cheeky wee smile on her face, I just love her so much, she knows fine rightly what shes up to but she melts my heart, shes also too young for me to correct her but simply adding humour to situations always dissolves it unless shes hungry or tired, I wouldn't attempt to correct until shes older and can understand what I'm saying, shes still little and her only way of communicating her frustrations is to cry or clinch her fists n anger

I am so glad this is common...my LO, almost 10 months old...will throw his head back along with his body weight if he doesn’t want to do something I’m trying to get him to. Like sit down to play...or change his diaper even...(that took like 20 minutes one time...since he would not sit still.... I feel like I really need some good advice for this...redirecting his attention to toys, remotes, wipes, etc is no longer working...

Mine does the same so I sit her in her chair tell her that I said no and let her sit after about 30 seconds I pick her up and tell her that it’s not ok to do that but let her know I still love her it’s been working pretty good and I try to let her know it’s ok to feel mad treat them like actual people they understand she is only 11 months

My daughter is the same way ! But trust me ! They understand NO . When my daughters gets started I firmly tell her stop no . If she continues . I let her know she’s going to get in trouble and she turns her attention to something else. Stay firm on it . Our kiddos know more than we give the credit for !

I work in a nursery and have been dealing with children and tantrums for years. We use a therapeutic approach as children are just learning and developing we can’t expect them to know everything already. I have some top tips that we give to parents at preschool. Tell her that you can see she is struggling and to stay close. Children will only remember the last word that you say at this age so if you say don’t run they will run if you say please walk they will do that. Also reminder that children’s brains are like marble runs they take ten seconds for their brain to process what you have told them. We need to give them time to process information before filling them with more questions. Also look up scheme play because she may be doing things that are really irritating you but actually are a play pattern. Lots of info on internet. There is loads more if you say I wonder if you are cross or what ever you think her behaviour is showing you it’s called naming her need

Have a look at makatom signing as children benefit from it they will drop the signing as they start to talk. Explain when things are finished instead of no more as they will only hear more and think that’s what you want them to do.

https://www.makaton.org/

Following because same. My little girl will flop and scream at me 😭

Ignore bad behavior and only praise good behavior

^ What Kristean said. I worked as a behavioral therapist and the best way to do it is first then. If she has trouble getting in the car seat pair it with reinforcement. Ask her before hand what toy she wants to bring and then let her know first she need to get into the car seat then she can have the toy. You can also use a snack as an option if that helps. As to the tantrums for not getting what she wants just place it on extinction and do not provide any attention. Like if it's not happening. When she's behaving appropriately, be specific on what you like that she's doing. Ex: I like how you're sitting and playing with your toys. Same thing can be with independently play you can set a timer and let her know first she'll play by herself for 1 or 5 min depending on where her tolerance is then she can have a reinforcing item or she can have some play time with you. Your baby girl is gorgeous by the way! Let me know if you have any questions.

Not for everyone, but I find these ladies incredibly helpful when dealing with the toddler tantrums (https://biglittlefeelings.com/). My little guy (2) also had tantrums from an early age, I found the best way to deal with them was to not react but to distract, the distraction was my saviour during those early aged tantrums.

My 6 month old does it.. isn’t that too early 😩

Worse word to use is no. You have to distract

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My son throws his water while eating to get attention my husband kept saying no sternly. I told him to ignore the negative behaviour and just keep reinforcing where he should put the water bottle on his tray. My son has been practicing placing it down and I tell him look how gently you put your water down you should be proud of your hard work. He loves that and claps and smiles. He is slowly starting to not throw the bottle as often now. There is no point getting too firm with them they are learning boundaries just be consistent in showing what you want to see and they will eventually follow.

Sign language helped so much for us in the first couple years! I just YouTuber some basic signs like milk, please, more, thank you, etc. Words that are used most often. She's much too young for discipline, but setting her down and clearly stating that that is not ok is ok to do :) oftentimes, children will act out for more attention, so usually making it known that you will give her positive attention when she can communicate what she wants will help her not escalate the situation. No Bad Kids by Janet Lansbury is a good read, and Parenting with Love and Logic by Foster Cline and Jim Fay is good too. Good luck mama, you're doing a great job!!

ugh, me too but I tell him that i’m here for him. Again your right they may not understand yet but they can feel the love and the boundary yk? But that’s what i do, I deal with the head throwing and the arms waving and the kicking and i grab him put him on my lap and talk to him as best i can and hug him. Eventually he stops yk after id say 1 minute or 2 maybe more depends but i still hold him and talk to him