Going back to work after a miscarriage

So I’ve recently had a miscarriage. I took two weeks off of work to help me get through it but I think I may have gone back to soon, I am struggling being there at the moment it also doesn’t help that I work with children so it’s constantly on my mind. How long did you take off work to get you through such a terrible time?

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3 years ago

Emily I’m so sorry 😢 I don’t think the pain ever goes away. It just gets easier with time. Have you got a good support system or anyone you can talk to. I felt like I didn’t talk enough about it when it happened to me. My heart goes out to you 💗

3 years ago

Don’t have advice, just wanted to say how sorry I am! Your rainbow baby will be here soon enough and will be that much more amazing! Prayers for you!

3 years ago

I’m so sorry for your loss. Everyone’s experience will be different. If you don’t feel ready it’s totally understandable. It takes so much time. And in that moment nothing helps. Nothing. I felt so alone and lost. I hope after your Christmas break it’s starts to get slightly easier. My heart goes out to you 💕xxx

3 years ago

I went back on Friday, i thought i was doing ok until my line manager had a go at me for being off, apparently the kids missed out on learning (never mind my miscarriage or the fact i might still be grieving) anyway... I completely broke down and ended up coming home at lunchtime. I wasn't ready to go back maybe... Really take aslong as you need because work only cares about work unfortunately (in some cases). X

3 years ago

That's terrible that your work are making you feel bad. I think it's very strange that people expect you to brush off miscarriage just because it's relatively common. Childhood mortality used to be common too (and very sadly still is in some places) but you wouldn't be expected to just 'get over' that straightaway. Something being common doesn't mean it isn't hugely painful. It can also be physically a very big deal. My second miscarriage was like a real labour, with hours of contractions that I'd say were as tough as in my full-term labours, plus lots of blood loss and fainting afterwards. In the UK we get a year off work to recover from full-term labour, so you really should get as much time as you need for recovery after a miscarriage. Are you a member of the trade union? They might be able to give you a lot of support, either to talk to/complain to your work or just to make you feel better supported.

1 reply

3 years ago

It’s so frustrating and sad that people who have suffered a miscarriage it made to feel like they have to just ‘get over it’ it doesn’t matter how far gone you are a loss is a loss and you should be entitled to time to be able to grieve. I’m so angry at my work for making me feel this way