Ashleigh
Ashleigh
New York City, New York, US
2 years ago

🤰The highs, lows, and realities of pregnancy

Here at Peanut, we’re passionate about facilitating candid conversations across the real-life experiences that we share every day. 🙌 We’re on a mission to shine a light on everything women go through during pregnancy, so we’re calling upon you to share the realities of your journey - the highs, the lows, and the real-life situations. From morning sickness that lasts alllll day to embracing your stretch marks, we want to hear it! Leave a comment below or DM me privately to share your highs and lows. ⬇️
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8 months ago

Bad surprises: The struggle to stand up for myself against pushy doctors, the struggle to plan a natural birth in a state where its not popular, constantly being asked "you're SURE about a home birth? Let's get you some paperwork for when you change your mind and come to the hospital....", the struggle to find a midwife covered by medicaid, the struggle to stay off hormonal birth control because I KNEW it would mess me up and it gave me post partum depression within a week! The struggle to fit a bassinette into a 250 sq ft home. The struggle to make sure my fur babies don't suddenly feel ignored. Positive surprises: I may never have wanted a pregnancy, but its apparently what I'm best at. I barely noticed being pregnant and 3 hours of drug free water labor and 3 stitches later, I'm a mom! My kid is so easygoing and friendly and brave and I blame the easy transition of being born at home in a soothing environment and never being alone, doing whatever noisy thing we do.

last year

I don’t feel like explaining everything again because I have a lot already (I should probably just write a note in my phone w my pregnancy story) But this entire pregnancy has been very traumatic and makes me very scared for birth and parenting

last year

My first three months were just unbearable I had pain in my left leg that came every 15 minutes. I was told to just take Tylenol but opted to not as long as baby was fine. Heartburn was my worst and generally feeling tired and worn out. I did not throw up but had zero appetite for food.

last year

Definitely having a stressful pregnancy. 31 weeks currently. Suffered from pretty bad depression since I was young - but got alot worse through pregnancy. Plus the nausea and very dark thoughts through my first trimester. I only have my partner for support. We also have had to put down my 4 year old puppy who was becoming unpredictable, reactive, and has bitten both my partner and I. This broke me… as I felt like I was choosing one life over another. And to top it all off we have moved twice, soon to be three times during this pregnancy. And my partner is trying to start his own company with my support in admin. It has been extremely stressful, heartbreaking, and I’ve been exhausted mentally and physically. I am full of anxiety and can’t seem to plan for the future anymore. Nothing is fun. And I almost feel like an empty shell that only matters because I have a baby in me.

2 years ago

I couldn’t mentally handle being pregnant so much so I booked my appointment for an induction the moment they said I could get it… I don’t regret doing it…

2 years ago

I’m mom of one gonna be mother of 2 come 7 more months I can’t wait for pregnancy to be over I am not one who enjoys pregnancy and can’t wait for a year to pass by after baby is born the older they get the easier it is babies are so difficult especially when your doing it all alone

2 years ago

I had a miscarriage last year with my first pregnancy - losing my baby is the lowest I've been in my life 💔 I'm currently 6 weeks pregnant, 2nd time, so it's too early to give too many real-life pregnancy stories! But I'm finding the morning sickness already really difficult - weirdly I'd consider it a high of pregnancy though as I'm hoping it means everything is progressing well and my hormones are as they should be! 💖

2 years ago

I’ve been sick my whole pregnancy. I was a very healthy woman before pregnancy even being plus size. In fact i was in incredible health, even with family history of health issues. I went from a perfectly healthy person to having gestational diabetes and it has really broken me down. It’s been really hard. The diets, the constant checking blood sugar, the insulin. It’s been so rough finding a balance. I’ve have back pain this entire time, the breast pain is worse than one would expect. Then with covid I haven’t been able to do a lot of things i wanted to. No gender reveal, no baby shower, there wont be a “meet the baby” and so much more. Im in the last weeks of my last trimester and it’s been so rough.

2 years ago

So I had two miscarriages so when I found out I was pregnant I was mad and sad. Because when I found I was pregnant was the same time that I was pregnant with my two miscarriage so I thought great other. That was my low in my point but in December when I heard her first heartbeat I was happy and I started to get so excited. I loved every moment of my pregnancy. I never had all those bad parts of pregnancy like morning sickness or pains or Braxton kick. I had none of that. The only time I felt uncomfortable was my last two weeks of being pregnant. But seeing her in my arms pain all that off

2 years ago

I thought I’d be one of those pregnant women who go to the gym and are doing kettle bell swings and barbell squats at 40 weeks pregnant. Turns out my strength and energy rapidly declined from 28 weeks and I sometimes even struggle to grate cheese 😅 I somehow feel hot and cold at the same time and my body can’t regulate temperate very well at all. My nausea returns for a few days every few weeks (just the morning and just the first 12 weeks is the biggest lie!!) And I feel the need to clean and tidy everything but my body won’t allow it. Back pain, belly pain, heart burn, bleeding gums, dypnea, lack of appetite and insomnia are all fun too 😂 All worth it for the little (sometimes big) kicks though ❤️

2 years ago

I feel as though both my pregnancies had been super difficult, my first was me having morning sickness 24/7 throughout my day.. it became so bad that I was in and out of hospital being admitted for fluids because I wasn’t able to keep food in me and instead puking it up constantly with zero energy, this brought on major anxiety and pre natal depression. I don’t know what was more painful my ex husband and his toxic controlling behaviour or the pregnancy itself! I always felt so bad for feeling this way because I’d get the 3rd degree for being honest for myself. When it comes down to it I wAs 3 days over due, spent 4days in hospital before the pregnancy and 10days after my daughter was born. My second pregnancy was just as traumatic with a family member making me feel less of a woman just because my sickness was all over the place and I wasn’t able to give birth naturally but ended up having an emergency c section things just weren’t as easy but I was judged majorly..

6 replies

2 years ago

For things that weren’t in my control.. apologies for my boring read 😩 hope you’re well and staying safe ♥️

2 years ago

Part 2^ lol sorry! When I started breastfeeding I was so adamant I was going to go all the way, only lasted for 3weeks because my son has a tongue toe which made it extremely difficult but he’s a little fighter her still tried and did so well, after the c section I found it so difficult to change nappies and it would take me 15mins to walk to the loo as well, I’d still have the judgement then and just as I was healing my stomach was taking it’s time too but all I’d get from ‘Family members’ were jokes about how I look like I’ve had 10 kids and how I still look pregnant, thankfully with counselling and medication I was able to recover.

2 years ago

You're definitely not alone. I'm having my second one And it's felt so much more draining overwhelming and exhausting than the first. Both physically and mentally. But all I can say is take the rest when you need it Listen and rune into your body. Allow yourself the time to unwind relax and enjoy peace and quiet while you have it. Take a warm.bath some slow music read a book or a magazine and just switch off.. they do say if you don't like water then diluted juices are just as good. Just go with what you feel your body needs and don't feel bad at all. You're definitely not the only one feeling like this xx

2 years ago

Low having preeclampsia and being in hospital with no one to come and see me because of covid. Being 7 days away from home and my 6 year old daughter High breastfeeding my baby who was born at 36 and 6 days so she didn't learn the suckling motion straight away.

2 years ago

Im 21 weeks pregnant with my 4th child and I am so ready for this to be over!!!! Ar first I was excited but the further I get the more miserable I feel. I don't have any support. My baby's dad says he's here but he wasn't even there when our son was born 2yrs ago and he has all these females he talks too

1 reply

2 years ago

So sorry to hear that...that would be a struggle just try to hang in there and keep your head up atleast you have your beautiful children

2 years ago

This is my 3rd pregnancy at 38 I thought I would be a dam hand and completely ok with everything and then the pandemic hit ! No gym no normality made redundant soo many changes, that hit me hard I haven’t really suffered with past pregnancy but this 1 sleeping has been hard not being able to switch off can’t eat any sugar as it causes the worst acid back pain from doing any movement restricts me even walking and during these times fresh air is important so overall the changes surrounding covid have hit the most and it doesn’t matter how much you think you know we still get affected in different ways during pregnancy.

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2 years ago

I’m really happy to be pregnant, the highs for me is every ultrasound, feeling her kick, and no more morning sickness (so far at least). The lows were/are morning sickness, insomnia, nasal congestion, heart burn, and general covid restrictions which most importantly include my husband not being able to go into my doctors appointments with me and then the feel of general isolation.

1 reply

2 years ago

Oh and body image issues. I always thought I was pretty secure with my body no matter the size but it’s been a bit of a struggle. At the same time I’m amazed with what my body is capable of and am really grateful that I haven’t had any stretch marks yet. While I struggle mentally with my weight gain I do love my bump.

2 years ago

Who even has MORNING sickness?! Mine lasted ALL day, everyday for weeks into the 2nd trimester even! Thankfully no stretch marks yet(34 weeks) but WOW-the heartburn is now real😤 PGP is seriously a killer! In all seriousness tho i shouldn't be a moaning myrtle, I know I am busy growing a tiny human and no one ever said it would be easy and I am blessed to be doing so! I am just disappointed lockdown means I won't be having a baby shower which I really wanted. We all need to make up for all the time we've lost with our girls/relatives as soon as we get chance!💖

2 years ago

A previous severe struggle with body image makes it hard to truly appreciate the beauty of a bump. Part of me loves to see it grow and know that my body is doing an amazing job, but a big part of me is already planning dieting post-birth and I spend a lot of time body shaming myself in the mirror. I'm sure I'm not alone in this but it's mentally hard! Especially when sickness and exhaustion takes a toll on your mental health anyway. I'm so excited and being a mumma is all I've ever wanted, I just hope to have a kind of body neutral experience soon 🤞🏽🥰 xxx

2 replies

2 years ago

Hey! I really hope that this is the case for most women and I hope so much that it is for me. Thanks so much for sharing 🧡

2 years ago

I just read a story from a woman who had just givin birth and she said she also had body image issues during pregnancy. She said, tho, after having the baby she gained a whole new respect for her body and what it just accomplished that the body image issues went straight out the window. She of course still had the post pregnancy bump but said she didn’t care at all because, again, she had a new found respect for her body ☺️💜.

2 years ago

Number 1. DONT BE PREGNANT DURING A PANDEMIC!!! especially if it's your first time. Hate to say it, but I loved the whole thing about being pregnant. Maybe bc I had 0 and I mean 0 morning sickness. But I had such bad heartburn half the time I had to sleep upright. Also NUMBER 2 do not be Induced. Worst idea ever (me personally...I heard rainbow and unicorn stories. Mine was the devil and hell. Pure. Hell) My biggest issue during all this is first off the pandemic. (I was pregnant December 2019 til August 2020) first 2 months amazing. But no one knew just our families and our 2 closest friends. By the time it was time to share it was heartbreaking. I've been told my son has saved a lot of people during this time. Also, the fact that I have 0 friends or family in the area. And 0 help. Id give up everything including staying at home if I could just move back to Cleveland and have my family and friends be there for support. Phones and Skype only goes so far. Overall I would be pregnant every day if I could lol.

2 years ago

My physical pain has been so high. Whether it’s my back, my nausea, dehydration, exhaustion, lack of appetite, etc I just feel miserable. I’m so excited to meet my baby girl I’ve wanted her my entire life, so it makes me feel ungrateful to be in pain and not be happy. I’m feel so anxious and depressed. My mind is constantly going a thousand miles a minute and I’m constantly worried I’m doing something that’s going to harm her like not eating enough greens. The mental and physical load of pregnancy isn’t talked about enough and it’s so draining. On top of it with the pandemic I feel so isolated. My husband isn’t allowed in any of our sonograms and this is our first and potentially last baby. It breaks my heart having to go through medical exams alone. Face scary news alone. Etc. On top of that I’m scared to get sick because of my preexisting conditions. All around I need a good cry and a vacation away from pain and stress.

12 replies

2 years ago

i feel you!! when i was pregnant with my daughter i was SO nauseous my whole pregnancy and dehydrated. i would be in and out of the hospital (before covid) and i was always just feeling horrible and miserable :/ i felt so bad feeling that way but we have every right to feel the way we do because it’s how we feel! but once you have your baby girl in your arms it’ll all be so worth it ❤️ you got this momma!! try some ginger ale or ginger teas! salt really helped me as well.

2 years ago

my ex wasn’t there for me at my scans or at all which sucked but it’s different because your husband wants to be there and he can’t. which is awful!

2 years ago

I was so excited to be pregnant honestly I really am but felt complete and utter shame when I had feelings of doubt. I’m beyond blessed but this is my first pregnancy and it’s nothing like many woman have to me it would be. I was nauseated all my first trimester and couldn’t get many foods down and here we are in the second trimester fighting the same battle. I get constipated all the time no matter how much fiber I ate, I hate drinking water and I love it before, and I’m tired all the time which really affects my mood. I use to be energetic and upbeat and now I feel useless and down all the time. I’m waiting for that glow moment or burst of energy everyone has always talked about and I just don’t feel that way. I seriously feel shamed that I feel the way I do because I almost feel like I’m not doing a great job for this baby like i feel a complete failure. I’m hoping things turn around soon and this pregnancy becomes better and happier.

3 replies

2 years ago

I feel this way too! My relationship with food and water has changed SO MUCH during this pregnancy from the nausea 😞

2 years ago

I had heartburn and felt like my belly was pumped with air like a basketball 1st trimester, but was manageable. 2nd trimester was easy, just swelling of feet. 3rd trimester heartburn again and later in trimester, stabbing feeling in my bladder. Overall it wasnt bad and i was able to work 3 12 hr shifts a week and also enjoy the summer (baby born Oct 30) and get alot of walking in. Best part was the movements and easy babysitting (aka carry baby everywhere bc he is in belly).

2 years ago

I hated pregnacy and being my first time during the pandemic it was really stressful and I felt neglected. But compared to my scary labor and colic baby, I miss it and sleep lol

1 reply

2 years ago

My pregnancy was a low to me nasuea, pelvic pains and hip pains. My sciatica nerve was horrible. My feet grew a whole size and they were swollen my whole pregnacy. I had food adversion not cravings. I only craved something twice and that was cholate milk and a brownie and Strawberries dipped in vanilla frosting. Lol. Headaches constantly even though I drank water like crazy. I had high blood pressure and even though I ate on the healthier and walked everyday even though I was in pain I still got gestational diabetes. My body was in pain since my baby started growing, the aches and pains were so real. And insomnia was the worst and tinkled myself so many times and omg the gas pains were horrible lol and even though my labor was quick I hemoridged and bled out. And my babies heart rate dropped drastically they had to vacuumed him out. Almost lost him. So I dont want to experience it again. Lol but a part of me wants to give him a sibling lol

2 years ago

High and low was the weight gain, as my bump grew i knew it was because she was growing and healthy but i couldnt help but feel insecure about how much i had gained. I was 134 and ended up being 177 on delivery day

2 years ago

Exhaustion! I was so happy to finally be pregnant but the exhaustion made me feel numb emotionally. Also, the hormonal and emotional roller coaster! For me the biggest physical impact was postpartum recovery. You think after 6 weeks you will be back to normal. But you're not! I wish I would have started exercising sooner!

2 years ago

Pregnancy during a pandemic just adds to the stress and strain as well. Honestly I've hated being pregnant, I feel useless and dependent on others when I'm usually such and independent person! Throw a pandemic in the mix and a lot of us are scared, worried, frustrated, depressed. Many of us won't get to see our extended families. Hardest part for me now is knowing my mum won't be able to meet her first grandchild until she is a few months old because of national lockdowns. It's strange the things that really upset you when you thought you were strong enough to deal with them!! I nearly cried with anxiety during my anomaly scan because my partner couldn't be there. Just can't wait to have her out and get my body back in some sense!!

1 reply

2 years ago

It’s so hard isn’t it, I’m so gutted my mum probably won’t be able to be there for the birth. I live over 400miles away from my family and they have closed the Scotland England borders, so I can’t see them and haven’t seen them in months. It’s such a difficult time to be pregnant, but just remember all the mums we meet through our babies friends will have gone through the same/ similar 💕

2 years ago

sickness, heartburn and indigestion, SPD, thrush, urine infections, mood swings- having to roll out of bed for the last couple of months and climb onto knees to turn over in bed. There's constant anxiety about birth and how it will go (especially in lockdown) and what condition my body will be left in at the end of pregnancy. On the plus side, I've always lost weight in my pregnancies because my appetite reduces and my skin is always clear which makes me happy 😊 but even though I have a natural glow, I do look like shit alot because I'm so tired 😂 I find my bump comforting and after birth usually miss it for a while. Also, another thing I've previously found weird is that - after pregnancy I miss the constant excitement and anticipation of appointments and meeting my baby... people are caring and considerate when you're pregnant and then after you have the baby no-one notices you or your needs anymore because they just want to see the baby 😂

2 replies

2 years ago

none at all, I'm on 50th centile. I just make sure I'm eating something and trying to balance with healthy foods/juices and also taking my vitamins. Most of time I've had things like beans and cheese on toast and a fruit juice or something 🤦🏽‍♀️ My bloods have been fine, and baby is growing well. I wouldn't worry, the baby takes what it needs x

2 years ago

Did reduced appetite and losing weight have any adverse effects on your pregnancy? I’m in the same boat with the loss of appetite and becoming a bit worried...

2 years ago

Ive never felt fatter and uglier than I do right now. I feel disgusting and unlovable. Im so depressed I dont even want to get out of bed.

7 replies

2 years ago

@Jenna I feel the same !!! So hard to get out of bed because I feel too ugly and fat to go outside. I feel like my “attitude” will offend someone. I’m so depressed.

2 years ago

😭 Awe girl I'm so sorry! You are not in anyway disgusting or unlovable! Or fat or ugly. I'm so sorry you feel that way

2 years ago

I feel like society hasn’t made space for the realities of pregnancy. To me it feels like there is an expectation to ‘glow’ and fawn and anything less than this is read as regret. It’s really unhealthy and unhelpful, leaving women feeling guilty for not enjoying every moment of pregnancy or feeling like their, very valid, experiences and feelings are in some way wrong. Pregnancy is a pretty rough ride for lots of reasons (all day morning sickness, back pain, constant peeing, thrush, nausea, headaches, fainting, anxiety, fear, isolation, lack of education/knowledge etc etc., but by far the most detrimental I have felt so far is the response from others when you give an honest answer to ‘how are you feeling?’. To me it feels like there is a gap in understanding and perhaps some residual ideology surrounding pregnancy and motherhood that is in need of an update!

2 replies

2 years ago

Thank you!! I feel like junk most days. Heartburn unbearable at times. Nausea getting old too. I’m ready to be done and I’m only 4.5 months along. 😭😭 And I don’t feel guilty for saying that. I tell my hubby any woman who says she loves every second of pregnancy is lying! 😂

2 years ago

I so agree with you! I am exactly on the same page. People will ask how I'm doing and then they get irritated with me if the reply is anything less than glowing and positive. I feel very grateful to be pregnant but I'm not going to beat around the bush, either. It is physically and emotionally challenging to be pregnant and sometimes the symptoms are disabling. There I said it. While it's important maintain positivity, I also feel like it's really disingenuous when women always portray pregnancy with rose colored glasses. It's OK to feel like crap sometimes. It's OK not to thoroughly enjoy every single moment of being a new mom. And most importantly, it is definitely OK to talk about it. I'm only 25 weeks and I'm already sick of the mom shaming.

2 years ago

I think I low key hated pregnancy.. first trimester I was nauseous all day. Second trimester I would get heartburn and acid reflux and third trimester I was just big and swollen and tired. I couldn’t sleep most of the time. The first 2 months of being a mom also sucked. Postpartum is super real. I thought I wasn’t going to get it and it just hit me randomly. The highs: being a mom to a baby boy who literally loves everything about you. He wants to be around you ALL the time, he needs you and loves u unconditionally. Watching them do new things.

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2 years ago

I’ve had a very difficult pregnancy. I’ve had HG throughout and only stopped vomiting multiple times a day at about 30 weeks. Im now 34 weeks and got heart burn, sciatica and just recovering from a water infection. There are moments when I see my bump that I enjoy the feeling of pregnancy but it quickly gets over taken by one of the bad parts. But for me the worse low by far has been lockdowns. I don’t live close to my family and I live in the south east of England which has been either in the highest tiers or complete lockdown. None of my family wants to visit as they don’t want to put me at risk which I understand but it’s lonely. this is mine and my husbands first child and we feel so isolated. I am the first in my family to have a baby and I never wanted a lot of fuss or a baby shower but I feel I’ve really missed out on family cooing over my bump and family and friends getting excited for me. I know I don’t have it that bad but can’t help but be a little sad and I miss my family.

1 reply

2 years ago

I can completely relate, I'm 26 weeks and still vomiting most days. It's definitely a challenge but just trying to go with it 💪 The heartburn has also started to kick in now. What an experience!x

2 years ago

Highs are definitely the kicking and movements and developing a bond. I also love having a bump! Lows, well, constant nausea and sickness up until week 16 then Pelvic Girdle Pain which has really affected my mobility and my mental health and is only getting worse plus I’ve had 5 episodes of PV bleeding with a low lying placenta so I get a bit on edge. I think Covid has been a huge factor in some of my lows too!

1 reply

2 years ago

It's all a process.Very soon it will be all over because with your bundle of joy in your arms,you will forget about the pain.

2 years ago

I suffer with heartburn all night long and it gets so bad I will get sick. But then laying in bed last night, I felt baby move and it was moving lots. And I forget about the puking and the pain and think about my baby 🥰 It’s all worth it.

1 reply

2 years ago

It will pass.Very soon it will be over.Just hang in there,try to forget about the pain and think about your baby and you will be fine.Think less of your pain

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