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2 years ago

Relationship with husband postpartum

As women and mothers we often facilitate talking about feelings. My husband and I communicate often. He’s receptive. He grows. I listen. It doesn’t hurt I’m trained in therapy. I help him untangle his thoughts and it allows him to breath and be a better dad and husband. Some days I’m off and need a moment. Husbands sometime read this as anger. It’s not. We’re not responsible for our husband’s happiness. I’m learning to say no when my inner voice is begging me to. Learning to not create an unreal expectation of only giving. Learning to share when something bothers me (even if it creates a bigger issue). Learning that complaining and expressing negative feelings doesn’t mean I take my husband’s hard work for granted. My feelings are valid no matter how hard he works. Am I right?
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2 years ago

Loving this

2 years ago

Oh man, you got me with "not set an unreal expectation of only giving". I have definitely done that this past year and am now really struggling to get my life back. It's not easy, I'm learning to be more demanding and feel less guilty because this year I have sacrificed so much for my family - especially my career and sanity. All we can do is keep trying to communicate, and hope for the best.

2 replies

2 years ago

Saying no is so liberating

2 years ago

Saaame 🧡

2 years ago

I also believe that with a few exceptions (abuse or cheating) if at some point you were truly in love with your spouse and you fall out of love, it is always possible to fall back in love if both parts put in the effort to make it work

2 replies

2 years ago

I want to like your comments like 20 times

2 years ago

Soooo true. Dating your husband is the funnest!!

2 years ago

I agree with everything you said! On top of that, I feel like when I share what bothers me and how some things make me feel, it helps my husband open up about things that bother him that I wasn’t aware of.

1 reply

2 years ago

YESS

2 years ago

You’re totally right!! After 5 years, I am still struggling with all of that. Sometimes it jst seems like the end, but I’m not giving up. ✨

1 reply

2 years ago

Don’t give up, love that!!

2 years ago

True this! expression is key

2 years ago

Beautiful family!! I sometimes just say I’m not able to talk about ‘x’ yet. He’s a waterfall, but every word I utter is taxing to me.

1 reply

2 years ago

Thank you 🥰🤗

2 years ago

What are those negative feelings?

1 reply

2 years ago

Any and all!! (Sad, angry, jealous, resentful)

2 years ago

I 👍 agree

2 years ago

There is this French book : “I stop complaining “ which is rooted in non violent communication and it basically says: emotions and feelings tell us something about our needs but if after listening to our needs we start complaining we actually get further away from getting our needs met. I personally think that sometimes i express my need for empathy (things are hard when big changes happen!) by complaining and I’m now trying to switch to explicit request like :” I don’t feel ok right now, would you please give me some empathy?” Sometimes my husband needs empathy as well and can’t give it to me, so if I can I make him go first or I just meditate.

1 reply

2 years ago

EXACTLY!!

2 years ago

So true ✨ we have to give others and ourselves compassion especially on our hard days. Regardless of circumstances our feelings are valid and we have the right to express them and feel safe while doing so 💜 I’m in the same boat. It’s a journey for sure. But fulfilling to see the growth.

2 replies

2 years ago

Love that journey for you mama 🤍

2 years ago

👆🏼Amen

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