Community Posts, Tips & Support on Toddler & Child

Honest, unfiltered, and in real-time: what women like you are talking about. Peanut group chats, support, and posts on Toddler & Child

Disciplining your child

So there’s been a few posts about spanking recently. I DO NOT want this to become a discussion on the merits of spanking nor vilifying people who do spank.

For the record I am against spanking. But then other people are saying that time outs and removal of toys etc are bad too.

How do you discipline your child to encourage a secure attachment, good emotional regulation, and robust nervous system development in your child?

neighbours having their garden done (rant)

I KNOW ITS THEIR RIGHT TO GET THEIR GARDEN DONE OR WHATEVER BUT ITS ALSO MY RIGHT TO BE SEETHING WITH ANGER 😭😭

baby is teething and going through huge developmental leaps which means sleep and nap times are officially world war 3, hes sleeping so extremely lightly or just refusing sleep as a whole 😭 im a single mum with very minimal childcare support so i'm dealing with everything myself and have literally been at wits end going insane because i need a break and the only time i get a break is when he naps WHICH HE ISNT DOING 😭
he also will not settle with anyone so if i accept childcare (which i do appreciate, this isnt their fault!) then when i get him he is just inconsolable and screaming because hes even more overtired than before and in turn even harder to settle🫠🫠

anyway he was extremely overtired and screaming and I finally managed to get him to sleep after hours of it... then I had 10 whole minutes before they started drilling in the garden next door 🤩 I have my windows and curtains shut in anticipation but it's just so fucking loud it doesn't matter!! its a miracle getting him to sleep as it is and he will not nap in any other room!!

they've been drilling all day every day for the last week now and its driving me INSANE!
theres nothing i can say or do about it either as they're just doing their job. i did ask them how many days left of the job and they said they didnt know.
its not like they're drilling at unsociable hours or doing anything wrong but its just the BANE OF MY EXISTENCE right now 😭😭 i am SO STUPIDLY ANGRY

Can my 6 month old baby have these Quaker Oats sachets with milk?

My baby turned 6 month old today but can’t sit up independently yet only with support. The health visitor said he can start purées such as porridge oats. Are these Quaker Oats ok?

Feeling fragile - NEED TO VENT.

I've just been visiting my Nan at her care home with my 7 month old. Whenever we go my daughter always gets loads of attention and the residents love her.
Today the visiting daughter of one of the residents made a remark which has upset me and this has surprised me.
My daughter rocks back and forth if you're holding her or she's sitting. This lady goes "oh she's strong, she's crawling too?" and I told her that she isn't crawling yet. Her immediate reply is one of disappointment/concern. She goes on to say "well dont let her skip to walking! My adult daughter skipped crawling and is riddled with anxiety, it's all connected".

I was like what the actual F***.

Firstly please may I see your diploma, lady I've only just met.
Secondly my son didn't crawl, has she now created something new for me to worry about????
Thirdly, I AM CRIPPLED WITH ANXIETY which you'd think she'd be a bit more thoughtful about having a daughter herself who suffers. She didn't think twice about passing down this "helpful" advice.

I have never been knocked by people's comments before but today I am feeling rough. It took all my energy not to cry. Of course I am blaming myself. We don't use containers like bouncers etc but I spent a lot of time walking with her in the pram or she is on my knee but whilst my son does football and swimming so of course naturally I feel like I've f*kd up already 😀 next time I see her I am going to say "think before you comment please".

I know this is a bit dramatic but like I said, I am fragile today. My daughter is currently playing on her tummy and I don't know what else I can do tbh. I thought we were doing the right things 🤷🏻‍♂️

Didn’t realise potty training was quite this intense

I’ve started potty training my 22-month-old daughter, and today is day one. She sits on the potty without any problems. I didn’t realise how intense potty training could be! 🥲

Basically, I’m watching her the whole day and taking her to the potty every 20–30 minutes, which is quite hard work!

She’s showing all the signs that she’s ready for potty training, so I’ve decided to stay home for a few days and let her wear just her underwear.

I know it’s only day one, and I’ll keep going like this even if it takes weeks. I’ve already accepted that the first few days will probably be the hardest. My back is hurting, and cleaning poop out of underwear is definitely not a nice experience! 😅

How do YOU maintain stress-free school day mornings?

With school starting back up next week it got me thinking into ways I could make mornings easier. I already went ahead and implemented the daily “outfit/uniform” organization to make life easier for my kids to dress themselves each morning and we have a designated shoe rack near the door. Interested to hear from other moms what they do to make their mornings stress-free without having to repeat themselves, nag, beg, bargain, negotiate, etc.

What tips would you share to help other moms out? Let’s share the knowledge instead of having to pay money towards some “Master Class” lol

Feeling like a really shit mum today

I’ve just spent the last hour crying my eyes out I feel like such a shit mum.

My 2 year hasn’t slept properly for 5.5 weeks due to a sleep regression, and there’s no signs it’s getting better, so we haven’t slept either. And since last night she’s had a fever and a stomach bug or something so she couldn’t go to nursery today.

That meant I had to work from home whilst looking after her all day with no support (no annual leave at work left, can’t afford unpaid leave, no family nearby to help, husband works in a call centre so he can’t help).

I think she was getting bored of me working, because all day she’s been horrible to me.

Throwing things at me, hitting me in the head hard with hard items to the point I have a lump and a headache, shouting at me, jumping over me when I’ve been on calls, refusing to have her temperature taken by hitting me and screaming in my face, and by the end of working and her still throwing things at me I shouted at her and told her off. She then went off crying because she doesn’t like being told off, and I felt like the worst mum in the world.

And I’ve been crying ever since.

I hate the fact I had to work today instead of give her my whole attention. I know people will come at me and tell me I had a choice but I didn’t. We can’t afford for me to take unpaid leave as my money covers most of our bills and food on our table.

I’ve just felt so stressed out and burned out today from a mix of everything I just feel like such a shit mum.

I don’t think I have a point to the post, I just needed to get it out and vent because I have no friends and nobody to talk to other than my husband and he doesn’t get these feelings because she’s good as gold when she’s with him.

Does this age ever get better because I don’t know how much longer I can cope with not sleeping and the tantrums?

Nursery Funding

Hello!
Our little one was born in January 2026 & I have secured a place for him starting March 2027 which is 2 weeks after I start back at work. I know that I'll be eligible to claim 22 hours a week free, but I'm confused about when to apply for the funding.

The nursery said to do it before Dec 31st. Do I just do it when he turns 9 months? I'm assuming that that would mean that he would get the funding for term starting in the new year even though he'll only be doing his practice days & then starting March & then I'll have to apply again for that next term.

Is this right? I've just heard of so many people getting caught out by when to apply & ending up with big nursery bills for the first couple of months because they applied late

Housework

I feel like I’m struggling so much to do everything! I have a 3 year old and a 9 week old. I have so much on my mind all the time and a lot on my plate and seems like I’m letting things slip due to either being so tired or being busy with my boys. Anyone got any tips to make it a bit easier to keep on top of household jobs?

Babysitters

What is the going rate for babysitters these days? I have no idea. I have to work on a minor upcoming holiday. My child’s preschool is closed. I was thinking like $150 for the whole 8 hour day. Is that too much or too little?

I’m getting ready for divorce

Today was our sons first day of 1st grade, my husband drank 2 pints of tequila last night and was a doing insane things all night which kept me up all night checking on him and making sure he was okay every time I heard loud noises and screaming from him. I got 2 hours of sleep and had to get up and get my son ready for school and my 2 year old ready to take with us while my husband is still sleeping as I type this!!! He didn’t even wake up to tell our son good luck on his first day and he didn’t seem to care to go with us to the school to send him off. I’m beyond pissed I planned on leaving soon but I’m a sahm I have literally NOTHING in my name! I don’t have a bank account, I don’t have a car, I don’t even own a bed. He bought everything and it’s all in his name or his mom’s name. I need out but I have no idea how I’m going to take care of my kids without having anything at all…

Are these Quaker Oats sachets ok for 6 month old?

My baby turned 6 month old today but can’t sit up independently yet only with support. The health visitor said he can start purées such as porridge oats. Are these Quaker Oats with milk ok?

Electronics

Do you let your kids watch YouTube kids? My kid is 5 and we let him at first, but have since stopped since it seems to be very addictive.

are your Feb babies sitting up independently and ready to wean to eating solids?

My baby turned 6 month today and isn’t sitting up. Can I still feed him purées? Any homemade purées ideas pls??

Partner is struggling

Baby is 13 days old, we are so on love with him and also have a little girl who's 4 in two weeks. My partner is an amazing dad, he's really struggling though with the balance of toddler and new baby and is finding the noise in particular from them both extremely overwhelming and overstimulating to the point where he has almost had some tears and lots of stress/getting snappy when it's loud.

He also told the health visitor when she visited today that he is struggling and finding it hard to bond with baby despite me thinking he's doing really well with both of them. He's been great these past two weeks he's taken out daughter on days out and had baby so i can rest and apart from feeding him (i breastfeed) is doing his best to cuddle and spend time with both of them equally.

How can i help him? The last two days we haven't got out of the house and he's really tense and stressed like he wants to run out the door but i'm still recovering and not exactly finding it easy myself so there's not much more of the load I can take on myself without burning out, especially as in 7 days he goes back to work and i'll have the two of them pretty much solo going forward. I want to be sympathetic to the fact that he's struggling but I'm doing all the nights with baby and alot of the day to day stuff still like washing and tidying etc so him struggling is a tad suprising as his main job whilst he's been on paternity is to entertain our toddler and I didn't expect him to be struggling this much considering it's ehat i've done as a stay at home mum for the last few years as well as all the housework🫠 I'm finding it hard he needs a break already when i've gone years without a day off from parenting but at the same time I'm trying to be understanding as he's not used to it and having two has been a new challenge for us both

Day 2 of potty training zero accidents!!! We completed commando when do I introduce underwear?

Advise

Need some advice as completely feel like I’m going to lose my head! :(

My toddler has just turned 3 and the past week since he’s turned 3 he’s been such hard work! Been lashing out massively, just got back from shopping and never been so embarrassed in all my life he was shouting screaming crying saying he wanted cake and toys however I did not get him anything due to his actions! He slept so badly last night and I just feel like all of a sudden he’s turned into a devil, understandable he could be tired of course but my goodness he’s usually good as gold in shops! It’s making me feel so emotional and stuck and like I’m a terrible mum! I’m also a single mum, no help off his dad or involvement so can’t even chat to him! 😞 this is a horrible feeling!!!!! 😢

Oh you wanna talk about mothers…

Yes I do! Anyone else’s mom or mother in law wanting to be called the strangest grandma names?! My mom wants to be called “Gramdy”, a mix of her name and grandma, and my mother in law wants to be called “Amma” ,which is Northern European for grandma (keep in mind we’re all born and raised Floridians- no European in any of us). I know it’s not that big of a deal and I know they are both excited being it’s the first grandbaby but honestly I just wish they would both just pick more common names. I haven’t said anything to either of them because I love them so much and want them to be happy but the idea of my son calling them these weird ass names makes me mad lol any advice? Thoughts?

Nursery day care

When is everyone planning to send theirs. I'm thinking of going back to work when LG is around 18m which is when my first went. But he hated it, he was thriving when he went around 26 months. But I really want to go back to work. Any suggestions?