Community Posts, Tips & Support on Parenting

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I'm really disappointed

My 40th birthday is Tuesday. I told my wife I wanted to go fishing. We did it like 10 years ago and had a great time. My wife spoke with her mama and was told renting a charter was frivolous and too expensive. She told me we would get push back from her parents if we went. I told her to forget about it. Don't worry we won't go. But in my heart, I feel like I was just told I'm not worthy of celebrating. I'm not worth the time or money. My inlaws just went to Tennessee for 8 days to celebrate FILs birthday... and we were going to pay for the trip ($400 for the charter, $150 for the hotel room so we don't have to get up before the sun, and any food we had while there) The inlaws could have either come with or stayed behind and watch little man. But I'm not worth it. Too much celebration for just me. We screw it. It will just be Tuesday. Don't worry. I'm used to being forgotten about. I will live. But let's just see how much I invest into this family.

Would it be weird if I added her on fb ?

So we live in quite a rural area , there’s a crescent at the top of my lane that’s pretty much just full of kids with a park in the middle of the houses. Now we live like half way down the big lane so not as close to the kids as my son would like lol.
There’s an older kid who drives up and down on his bike I want to say about 9-10 who regularly asks if he can come in my garden to play with my son.
He stays for a couple hours at a time sometimes , I’ll ask if him mum knows where he is and he says yes.
He’ll ask for snacks when I’m giving them my toddler and I’m okay giving them in just worried him mum wouldn’t be okay with it or if he has allergies ?
Should I just add her on fb ? But then do I message her ? Is that weird ???
She’s popped up on my people you may know & I know it’s her as she’s a picture of the son in her pfp but she might have no clue who I am and that her sons been here ? Idk I’m definitely overthinking it but help a girly out plz haha

Ungrateful husband or frigid wife

I work in a school and I'm off for the 6 weeks so majority of childcare is on me, my husband does shift work and this week he was on a course up city so wasn't getting home until 8/9pm.

So bare in mind he's sat in a nice air conditioned board room with regular breaks and lunch and drinks paid for by the company he comes home and keeps poking at me saying he's not got his leg over In weeks, he's never nasty about but it's everyday its "oh it would be nice to have something else" or just makes some sort of sexual induendo.

My reply to that is I'm tired, Ive entertained our son, fed him his breakfasts, lunches & dinners, taken him to nice places, walked the dog, cleaned up the house each evening and done the bath and bedtime routines...by the time our son is asleep I'm ready for bed myself.

And I've told him! I said I feel like you just overlook everything I do, he normally says sorry and backs off and says he's joking etc...but its everydayyyy 🫠.

Just needed a rant. 🤣👍🏻

Let’s vent. Tell me something that pissed you off today. Petty or not. Serious or not.

My husband waited until our son was home from camp to start the laundry. I was in bed all day with a PMS migraine. We’re both in vacation right now and our son does half day camp 10-2. By the time I started to feel somewhat normal bubs was home and that’s when my husband started the laundry. In and out of our apartment for the last few hours. (We had a lot) I’m grateful he did it without me asking. But seriously leaving me with a toddler while PMSing and dealing with a migraine hangover 🥴. Not his best timing. And before you come for me about at least he’s helping. Hush. Let’s raise the bar for men. It’s far too low.

At a loss…

Last November I logged my husband’s first seizure (he’s 39 and in otherwise great shape), they stopped for a while and then came back in May at 1 per month intervals now. Nearly every time I told him he shrugged it off saying it was probably something else and I was mistaken. This last time it happened (2 days ago) I recorded it and showed him. Today, he said he did research and knows what’s wrong with him and that I’m a moron for thinking he’s not smart enough to do research. He also proceeded to call me a heartless gold digging bitch for recording him instead of calling an ambulance, even though we discussed me doing this the next time it happened. His seizures don’t ever last more than 1.5 min and after 5 mins is when I am told you should be worried.
Basically, I’m trying to understand how I am the asshole for wanting him to go to a neurologist. He’s pushing me away and all I want is for him to live. I don’t deserve to be called the things he calls me and I’m about at my breaking point for giving up. 😞

Don’t enjoy sitting with my kids

I love my kids, but I feel guilty af when I say I hate sitting with them. They climb on me, toys get dashed across the room. Like overtime I will find any reason to not sit on the sofa with them. I will sit on the floor and play with them but I don’t see it as a relaxing time with my kids. My son threw a toy across the room this morning, split my lip so that went in the bin. Then they’re fighting to sit in my lap. My coffee cup is going cold in the kitchen because I know for a fact if I bring it in it’ll get knocked out my hands.

My daughter’s already been in tears that I ‘don’t care about her’ because I won’t let her sit on me, for reference she’s nearly 6. I don’t understand why she can’t lay next to me and cuddle me that way, why do I have to become a pin cushion for knees and elbows. My partner practically refuses to sit in here cause they do the same to her and she feels like the living room has become the kids room because we can’t sit in here without there being fights on who gets to sit next to who. By the time the evening rolls around we’ve climbed into bed exhausted

Did I come at him sideways

I will add the rest of the screen shots in the comments. But my husband started some laundry right before he went to work. We live in an apartment and you need a special key to get in. Well he took that key with him.

He has been on my butt about leaving the baby alone. He even expects me to bring the baby into the bathroom with me when he is at work. This has caused me to fall behind on laundry instead of me doing it twice a week I'm only finding time to do it on his days off.

Urge to do DIY

Anyone else in this phase?

I have wanted to do the hallways for the longest time. I paid a man £600 to do it, he ran away with the money and didn't do nothing 🤣 lesson learnt.

I've always had the mentality if I want something done I just need to do it myself. So this morning I just said fu* it and started to paint.

Don't know what possessed me to do this at 32 weeks pregnant 😅

I just really wanted a change before baby arrived.

After this I'm tempted to strip the wallpaper in the sitting room.

Then I have this random mirror sitting around thebhouse. Think I will turn it into a grid mirror or something vintage looking.

Any one else working on home projects?

Misbehaving

Our two year old daughter nearly three is misbehaving and I don't know what to do.

I have been pregnant, just had a baby a couple of days ago, so there is a lot change going on with her however it is not an excuse.

Our daughter has started hitting, kicking, not listening to us and refusing to go on her potty. As well as having massive trantrums when we say no to stuff.

She does have her moments where she's good but recently she has been getting worse.

Any advise, suggestions on how to discipline or manage a child when they misbehave?

Nursery Communication

My daughter absolutely loves her nursery, she goes 3 days a week and the staff in her room are brilliant. However, I feel that the communication to parents has slipped recently. Things like not all meals not being loaded onto the app, weekly observations/photos are hit and miss (we should get at least one a week) and the last termly assessment was before Christmas. I’ve emailed the manager twice about this to be told they’ve spoken to the room and asked them to ensure that the information is loaded but it isn’t consistently happening. I’m not sure if I’m over reacting but my view is that I’m leaving my daughter for a significant amount of time so should know what she is eating/doing/how she is progressing etc. I’m not sure what to do next, any advice/thoughts would be welcomed please

Daycare issues

So mothers who have their children in a child care center. How do y’all handle the school director who’s saying a child is being aggressive and hurting their classmates but classroom teachers says opposite of the situation. My son who’s 4 years old been going to kiddie academy and the school just randomly called today an hour after drop off saying my child he’s hurting himself and being aggressive towards other children without them providing the information to what triggered him to behavior like that. My son is raised in a good home with all love and affection and never plays rough with his cousins or when outside to the park never have I observed such behavior from him or even hear family or friends saying anything of that nature. I’m a mother just trying to understand and if anyone has come across such incidents before please let me know.

Feel like im drowning

I know it is just a phase and things will get better but I honestly am struggling so much! My baby is 3 months old. I always wanted to be a mum but I have been finding it so much more challenging than I thought it would be. I love my baby so much and when he smiles, I forget how hard things have been but whenever he is crying or I finally get him to sleep and have a moment to think, I can honestly say I am not enjoying motherhood.

Baby is having problems with feeding and I have had to go private to get the support I need as I was not gwtting any help from the NHS. He is bottle fed but has a tongue tie (recently diagnosed). This has caused alot of colic symptoms which have been a real struggle. Going private now is also an unforseen expense which is going to be a challenge to work around but for my baby to feel better, I will make it work.

I dont have family in the country and have very few friends. I have struggled to make mum friends through antenatal classes or baby groups so I feel very alone. Also, everyone around me with babies dont seem to be having the same experience.

I feel so isolated and alone and just dont know if it will get better.

I dont really know why I am posting this.. probably just to get it off my chest.

Am I being too harsh?

I’m due in two weeks and my partner and I have been arguing a lot recently. We have a two year old son and he’s a great dad, cleans, does bath times, does his bit around the house, always does pick up. He will do whatever I ask him to do, but this is my problem, I feel like I’m carrying the mental load, always having to remind him of things we need to do/prepare for the baby and I’m just drained always being the one that needs to remember stuff. He’s saying that I’m nit picking and never happy and doesn’t understand why me having to remind him is a big deal. It’s got to a point where I don’t know how we can move forward as we’ve had this same argument for years. He thinks I’m exaggerating and I’m just tired of carrying all the little decisions and remembering things daily. I’m not sure what our future looks like but I’m also like is this just how men are?

Posts about child abuse

I've seen a couple of posts lately about noticing a child being abused in some sort of way, and the person then questioning whether or not they should report it.

I just want to put this out there for anyone who has doubts about reporting child abuse.. The answer is YES. Yes you should always report it if any part of you is concerned! Report it anonymously if you're scared for your safety. You could literally be saving a child's life!

Just wanted to put this out there for anyone that second guesses themselves.. its better to be safe than sorry

vacuum

if i’ve already vacuumed this week then fuck the toys i’m vacuuming around them

Parenting

My son is 4 about to be 5. I’m so tired of this life . I miss waking up in silence . I miss going for myself without no distractions. I thought motherhood would be exciting but I dread it . I work a shift I don’t want to . I can’t travel I can’t do much . I miss myself before I had a kid and I feel so selfish like bad karma will happen because I’m tired of being a parent. Everything involves my kid . I just feel weak and vulnerable. I hate that I had a kid with someone I wouldn’t even touch again . I hate this life . I wake up miserable everyday. My son deserves a happy mom . I hate this life god why was I so stupid

Am I being dramatic?

So I told my boyfriend he has been on the game for 2 hours and hasn’t acknowledged me within those two hours. He said “so, even if it’s 3 hours who cares?” I now want to cry so bad bc what?! He said you still have all day with me, which is not my point. I still deserve to be acknowledged after a game. He brushed it off, helped me sweep rq then went right back to the game. Now if I start crying he is going to call me dramatic.

Unruly 4 year old

I’m so upset. I feel like I have failed as a parent. Does anybody else have a child that they can’t control? I just received a call from my son’s camp saying he was running around screaming the F word then jumped on top of a kid and grabbed their private parts. I don’t know what to do. I talked to my mom about it and she seems to think it is my fault that I let him get away with things when he was younger. My husband and I often talk to him about his behavior but it doesn’t seem to be working. Does anybody have any suggestions?

How much support does your partner really give?

I’m struggling with feeling like most of the childcare and housework is on me, and my partner only helps if I ask directly. How do other mums get their partners to be more supportive? Would love to hear what works in your family.

Threenager regression what in the ever living fuck

Firstly. Hope all you guys are well. I love popping back in here after months of quietness when we're all going through the next shitshow together and panicking 😅

Just to say. I have no idea who this small boy is who is tantrumming, screeching, screaming, defiant, stubborn, angry and at times ... Aggressive(?) I don't mean that but he has suddenly started throwing things when he's in a mega meltdown and I have no idea where it come from. He has turned from a very kind, gentle little dude to a loud AF monster 😳 refusing naps, refusing bed, getting up through the night, getting up stupidly early considering he was up through the night and didnt go to sleep til way after his usual time.

I miss him. The kind gentle version 😭 and for the first time in three years, I think I need a day off 😩 then I feel guilty saying that cause I love him so much and I know it's just another phase but my god. He's finding it hard and so the hell am I 😭

Heres to starting nursery next month 🤞🏻😅