Motherhood
  • W
  • 28 days ago

Has anyone else mourn their dream birth? And how did you over come the guilt and shaming on oneself.?

So I'm 5 weeks pp. Long story short. I'm still having a hard time letting go of my birth not going as expected or dreamed of. My goal was having a natural unmedicated birth. I practiced breathing at nights. Meditation. Birthing ball. So at the hospital I made it to 9 1/2 cm dilated. At 4 pm. Then next thing you know it was midnight and nothing was happening. I was super tired. And at the end midwife gave me the option of an epidural. And out of devastation. I gave in. It was my goal since I have anxiety disorder and I really wanted to believe in myself. And the fact that I was right by the finish line and I didn't walk through it. Breaks me. I know I could have another one. But this is my second baby with gestational diabetes for the second time. And I don't want to get preg.again because of health issues. I keep asking myself what "ifs" what if I prayed more. Or believe more faithful. And in myself. Or should I have waited a bit longer. Or tried pitocin. Idk... this really sucks 😕( in the picture u see tissue box that the nurse handed me.because iwas crying after the epidural. )
  • R
  • 28 days ago

I was devastated with my birth. I planned a natural no medication birth. However what I got was an emergency c section. My daughter flipped and stuck her foot and a tiny bit of her leg through my cervix. I was gutted I didn't get any labour experience at all, not even 1 single contraction. I beat myself up for not having a baby like a normal woman and just having to lay there. After 8 weeks of crying because I felt useless ... I looked at her and decided that she's here which is whats important... am I going to allow the fact I didn't feel a contraction to ruin my time with her ... no, so I decided to put her birth behind me and enjoy watching her grow instead xxx

  • S
  • about 2 months ago

Please don't be so hard on yourself, it sounds to me like you did incredibly well and it's important to remember that you're not a robot and can't control everything. Do your hospital do a debrief service? If so, it might be worth looking into and talking through what happened and why so you can get some closure and move forward x

  • J
  • 2 months ago

i had my girl a month early, so it was super unplanned lol,my pregnancy with her was rocky and rough, when it came to my normal dr visit with my ob, that same appoitment he told me i needed to be induced that day, i was 35+6 days, he didnt ket me go home to go get clothing my hubby had to go get everything lol, i did get induced that night i wanted a natural birth but my dear daughter started giving problems again and they had told me i may need a c section so i should get an epidural as a just in case, which i did in the end, and i didnt need a csection either lol, which is great, but i dont think i ever got sad or anything how my birrh plan ended up being, just cause she was just aproblem pregnancy from the start that it didnt really phase me at that point lol, but its okay to feel how you want, but not everything goes to plan which is also okay too

  • E
  • 3 months ago

I wanted a natural water birth. It was my first baby but second pregnancy so I knew what contractions were like and knew I could handle it. We ended up having complications and I had to stay in the bed in a specific position so I couldn't get comfortable as well as being on my own. I had a midwife holding my hand but there wasn't really anyone to talk to so my mind was only on the pain. It wasn't as bad as my first experience but definitely not what I wanted. Seeing other people's births sometimes makes me jealous. I just hope the next one is born out of the pandemic at the very least. Having someone there will be an improvement, water birth is ideal but the bar is low now 😅

  • D
  • 3 months ago

Don’t be so hard on yourself! There isn’t one way that every child comes into this world and things never go as expected during labour. It doesn’t make you any less strong! Just remember you DID get to finish line…you got to hold your sweet baby in your arms and created that life inside you. You brought that baby into this world and that is still incredible. In life nothing goes according to plan but it’s the way we deal with things that’s most important. There is no shame in having an epidural or C section. It makes zero difference to the health and happiness of your children. Think of it this way when you walk down the street can you tell which child was delivered naturally or with the aid of painkillers/C sections! You’ve done a great job mama be proud x

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