When did you leave baby with others?

I have a 4MO girl and other than a couple of hours with my partner or my mum (even then I’m panicky!) I can’t face leaving her with anyone, especially for longer periods of time.

Is this unusual or normal? My partner has got a bit annoyed as he thinks we should be leaving her with his mum for hours or that he should be able to take her for the whole day and this makes me petrified!

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I’ve been the exact same!! My little one is now 7 months old and im only just starting to leave him with my mother in law now and it’s been a difficult transition (she’s having him for me 2 days a week when I go back to work) I wish I started it earlier!

I only started when I went back to work when he was 12 months. At 17 months old he still has never slept out or been without me or his dad if I’m not at work.
This is super normal! 🩷 when I’m without my little one I feel like I’ve lost a limb. Particularly in those early months like that! X

My parents or in laws would start watching my kids for a couple hours at a time I would say around 6-8 weeks. For me to go and do quick things like a nail appointment or peaceful grocery shopping, but I trust them 100%.

My LB hasn’t been looked after by family at all he’s 18 months. Dad has only watched him while I shower and once taken him to his mums for an hour last Christmas because I was too poorly.
He started nursery at 11 months and goes three times a week but no one else has even asked to watch him. Still don’t think I’m ready to be honest.

At 7 months pp now, my mil will come to watch my baby at my place for a couple hours because I need to pack for a long trip we gonna make. We never left our baby to anyone and don't plan to do it anytime soon.

My little one is nearly 6 months old and I have only ever left her with my husband for a few times to go either to the gym or an appointment and once with my mum for 10mins to quickly collect food. I was still very hesitant and I am still. My husband thinks it would be fine to leave her without either of us for a few hours with my mum or sister but I’m still petrified to do so. You’ll know when will be the right time, but don’t take pressure from others or have others force you to leaving your little one, because you won’t relax while you’re away from them anyway. Trust your judgement 😊

My parents had him overnight most Fridays from around 6 weeks, I wanted him to have a close relationship with them & to also not be a baby that was super clingy to me and be happy with other people. They’ve raised children they’re very capable of looking after him. Me and my husband wanted to also still make sure our marriage was being prioritised and we could have some time alone.
But there isn’t a right or wrong if you’re not comfortable then don’t do it. But the more you do the less anxious you are x

yesss, forgot to mention date nights ! Super important.

Only just started to for few hours at 11 months

Me and my partner had a date night when baby was 4 months. We went out at 5 30 and daughter when to grandmas and by 8pm we were ready to go back home she picked us up and dropped us all home as i didnt want her staying out when my partner & his mum kept hinting it... That was long enough for me. But at 6 months i had my daughter in childminders (who we knew of and trusted) so she spent every wednesday there since. She loves it and its helped her to come into her own. Be with other children (3 others as its personal in home childcare not nursery) and we were happy to do things that way bit by bit. But that 1 day was enough.
You wouldn't leave your child with anyone. & everyone is different on who they feel comfortable with etc. If you dont feel okay about it then don't. Its completely up to you who you'd want your child to be with xx

Thank you for asking about this! And thanks to the fellow momma’s for answering honestly. I’m due in July, and my MIL Is ALREADY asking us to pick one day to watch our baby girl every single week. I’m sorry, but we’ve gotta get through the pregnancy and delivery first, and then get her on a routine and through the brand new newborn stage. Like, I’ll let you know because, yay free child care, buuut I don’t know when I’ll be comfortable with it!

19 months. It's just me. Always.

in our community

Is this clever or cruel?

My husband and i were talking and with social media and the internet in general being a terrifying dumpster fire, we are trying to figure out the best way to keep our son safe while still teaching him how to safely be online and moderation.

We landed on the idea of giving him the 90's kid treatment. A computer in the living room for us to keep an eye on what hes doing online, and once we feel hes mature enough to hang with friends without adult supervision he gets a flip phone. When we feel he is responsible enough and he earns and saves up the money for the physical phone, case, and screen cover, then we will be happy to take him to get a smart phone.

I thought this was air tight, but now my brother says its cruel to give a kid a flip phone, and besides he can just use his friends phones at school.

My husband and i remember a time before the internet, and we remember having complete access to something no one understood yet. We saw unspeakable things and are always battling with the urge to put the phone and social media down. I dont want that for my son, especially with his brain so vulnerable still.

If your partners parent passes away

And you and that parent didn't get along are you still go to the funeral?

Not my situation!

Partner no longer wants baby #2

Before our son was born we originally both wanted minimum 2 kids but we were hoping for 3-4. My partner found the birth traumatic to watch and also struggled a lot with the newborn/baby stage. He no longer wants to have any more children and it’s completely breaking my heart. I need another baby. We’ve spoken about it a lot and the options. He said he wasn’t COMPLETELY closed off to it so I asked him to try and work through his feelings and reconsider his decision. He eventually said he definitely doesn’t want another. I know that I will always want one and my feelings will never change. Do we have to break up or does anyone know anything else I can do to help change his mind? Has anyone else’s partner said this and then changed their mind? I don’t want to break up because I adore him and our life together and I’d hate to split up our family for “selfish” reasons and make my son miss out on having both of us together but I just don’t know what to do

Nursery funding

My child turned 9 months last week. I applied for government funded hours nearly 2 months ago and so well within the required timeframe for the April term, however upon receiving my first invoice without the funding applied and having questioned this, I have now been informed that the stretched funding doesn’t start until 4th May.

Has anyone else been told it won’t start until May?

The government site states it should start from April 1st, and so I intentionally set my nursery start and return to work as the start of April for that reason, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to afford the nursery on my sole income without the funding

Jealous of my husband

I’m so jealous of him and it’s making me resentful. We have a ten week old and I’m jealous that he is at work all day. I’m jealous he can leave for lunch and actually eat an uninterrupted lunch. Take a phone call uninterrupted. Chat with a friend he runs in to uninterrupted. Even go to the bathroom when he wants uninterrupted. He comes home from work when he wants. He’s not on a set schedule. Some days are late some are early. It depends on when he’s done. I’m jealous he can come home at 10pm and shower, eat and go right to bed uninterrupted because I already have the baby asleep. He doesn’t have to worry about anything house wise or baby wise because I’ve done it all. Meanwhile I’m covered in puke and crap and smell like rotten milk. When he is home he is VERY active and helpful. So it’s not that. I’m just jealous his world hasn’t changed and mine has I guess. This isn’t something he’s doing wrong so I’m not sure how to get past this. I wish I could keep him home all day because that’s how helpful he is, but I understand he obv needs to work.

NHS job

Anyone work for the NHS and does 12 hour shifts? How do you work around childcare and your partners job?