Following God's Will...

Hi, moms! I'm in CA & if you're here or have lived here, you know how wildly expensive it is. My husband and I got married 2 yrs ago and have two children (1 still growing in the womb). We've been praying for awhile about whether it's God's will for us to move out of CA. The politics and morals are reprehensible & the cost of living for a blue collar worker and a mom who wants to fully stay home is very difficult. All our family is here, but specifically my parents are who we are closest to & who help our family the most. Not to mention our 17 mo is in love with his grandparents!! My question is: If you've moved states, away from supportive family, how's it been going? A particular state keeps popping up for us & I don't want to push it away if it is truly God's Will for us despite knowing how difficult it'll be and how sad I will be not having my parents around!

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I lived states away from my parents for about 6 years before marriage and baby, so not at all the same, but it was both hard and worth it. I was able to visit very frequently and met my husband there, so it was the right choice. I have an incredibly tightly knit family, and I can’t imagine being away from them now with our baby, but I also know we would move if we needed to. We moved away from his family to be here, and it’s sad that she’s away from so much loving family, but she’s only 2 months old and has already seen everyone at least once. Maybe having some more room in the budget will allow your family to still spend quality time with family, even if you don’t live nearby anymore!

I can't speak from my own experience, but I have a really good friend that moved from Massachusetts to Florida. They said once they went to Florida on vacation and never left; they rented a place and moved down there completely. They still go and visit family once or twice a year, but she said to me that she loves her decision to move to Florida and she is genuinely happy with it. They still video chat family she all so their kids do know them well. She had built many great friendships and created "family" there. She has so many people that love and treat her kids like they are their family and that are there to help watch them when needed. They said it was rough starting out but all feel into place and they never question their choice 🙂

This is a very personal decision, but I would never choose to move away from my family. The circumstances would have to be dire for me to move further than an hour from my parents (and my husband’s parents). Family is a huge part of our life, and we can’t imagine it being worth it to live away from them. When I was in dental school, I did live several states away, which was good for me to gain a sense of independence, but that was as a single person and for a limited amount of time. Now that I’m married with a baby on the way, I wouldn’t want to be far from them. Again, this is a very personal decision, and I know plenty of people who live away from family and make it work just fine.

I’m a military brat who went out of state for college and currently lives nine hours from my family. We’re four hours from my husband’s family. Personally, I loved moving as a kid, and I always knew that I would go off on my own when I was able. I miss my family more now than I did in college. From an adult’s perspective (having moved from family), I’m doing okay. The first six months were the hardest for me, but once you find a group it seems doable to me! I got involved in church choir, a local choir, and made a few friends with some other military wives. As a kid (living away from grandparents as a toddler), I think that what’s important is trying to visit frequently (at the holidays, when you can). If you or your grandparents would be able to do that, then that’s what we did, and it worked for me, though I had never lived near my grandparents in the first place. I remember seeing them at Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter. I didn’t experience missing friends until 4 or 5

Thanks, ladies! The goal is to have disposable income to travel and visit family, especially Italy (where everyone but my parents and brother live). My parents are well off and I know they would be able to visit. I like the comfort of knowing everyone is here despite never seeing my husband's side unless it's a holiday or bday... I know my little family is the most important and if it is God's will for us to leave CA, I don't want to put it off due to fear. 💖

@Jaime they'd visit us anywhere :) The state is really dependent on whether it has work for my husband who's in construction! We're looking at Pittsburgh at the moment!

@Jaime We've been praying about all of it for a year & Pittsburgh keeps coming up! It definitely has a lot of what we would hope for (minus family). Lots to do for kids, relatively safe as a city, big Catholic population, lower cost of living, & if this job opportunity works out, it's basically what my husband's been looking to do! 🤞🏻 i'm just so stuck on the no family part lol. But ik that if it's God's Will, I'm not going to ignore it

@Jaime every state is gonna have colder and worse weather than california lol 🥴

@Francesca Except Florida lol

@Samantha that's true !! anywhere a little cheaper i should prob say lol

We moved from Cali to Texas. The politics and morals HERE are reprehensible! But the cost of living is much better! We live in Houston that is a refuge from the far right people hate mongers! While I abhor the Texas politics I do love the fact that Catholicism is prolific here. Far more than I ever imagined. I assumed Texas would have a Protestant churches all over and very few Catholic Churches.

@Andrea With a large Hispanic community, Catholic Churches are pretty common in Texas, and especially in Houston, you’re close to Louisiana which is very Catholic!

I'd pray the Surrender novena and offer it up to Our Blessed Mother as well. I'm a native Californian and moving out of CA was beneficial to my life in every aspect.