TW! Termination.
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How hard would he take it if you said you are definitely keeping it? It's tricky tricky because it's your body, but you guys had a prior agreement on no more babies. You're equally responsible for the pregnancy. Like would he threaten divorce? And if so, would it be worth throwing your marriage away? Or would he grumble and protest but ultimately accept it?
I agree to think about which you would regret more. I have no experience with abortions, but I do recognize they can be really hard on people and create a lot of guilt and regret especially since you’re married and could welcome in a baby even if unplanned.
He knows I'm really sad. I respect him so much as a person and as a dad I wouldn't keep it just to spite him but he also knows how hard this is on me. He's told me he feels guilty because he feels like he's making me do this. I'm almost 9 weeks now and I do feel a form of attachment amd love. If I do terminate I'm finding out the gender this week because I feel like I really need that to be a peace. I see this pregnancy as a baby already but he doesn't. I love my husband and 3 kids more than anything and I feel like I was born to be a mum but I also know how hard it is especially because I'm 35 next year, and my kids are 13, 8 and 3.
Now take this with a grain of salt. It comes from a place of love. (Yes love people can be loving to people on the internet lol) I think since you are moved to ask an opinion…. You might already have your answer? You’re in a way fighting for this baby already by seeking an alternative suggestions to your previous agreement. I would honestly just bite the bullet and ask your husband what would happen if you kept it…. Then you will have a more clear choice of what is at stake/not at stake. Because right now there’s a lot of fear for you. It will be clear when you have your absolutes. I hope this helps.
I think you've said that perfectly actually. There is so much fear inside of me with both sides and I feel so alone in my feelings. I really appreciate you saying that. It made me cry x
You deserve to not be scared. And you deserve clarity. And to be heard. And you deserve grace and love especially in this moment.
I don't have any real advice, but I'm sorry you are struggling with this. If you haven’t talked to your husband yet I think it's time. Maybe talking it over will solidify what you want. Think about how you'll feel if you do terminate and you how may feel if you don't. Which will be the regret you can't get past? Being pro-choice means just that. Being for each persons right to choose for themselves with no judgments.