Sisterhood or Sabotage? When Women Turn on Women Trying to Help

In my experience, many women seem unwilling to accept help or warnings, especially when it comes to recognizing subtle signs of manipulation or abuse. They often dismiss what they call “call signs” or red flags, even when these warnings come from someone who has personally experienced a toxic or narcissistic relationship. What I find both frustrating and disheartening is that, rather than listening or considering the perspective of someone who has been through such emotional trauma, some women choose instead to mock, attack, or invalidate her. It’s almost as if admitting another woman might have insight threatens their sense of control or confidence in their own judgment. This defensiveness is dangerous. It’s one of the reasons so many women still end up entangled with emotionally manipulative or abusive men. They convince themselves that they’re different .... more “chill,” more “in control,” more emotionally intelligent. They think, “That won’t happen to me,” or, “He wouldn’t treat me that way.” But the truth is, narcissistic and abusive people don’t show their true colors right away. That’s exactly why it’s important to take advice from those who have seen those red flags in action 🙄,often in the most subtle and insidious ways. It’s not about being a “know-it-all.” It’s about trying to prevent others from going through the same pain. So if someone is offering you insight born from real, lived experience, maybe the wiser choice is to listen not attack. Because if you truly “knew it all,” you wouldn’t be here looking for answers in the first place.