Depressed or normal?
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Definitely seek help. Can you get out on your own at all, like a walk/jog or see a friend?
I’m feeling the same way girl. Going to take the step of contacting my gp this week because I can’t stand feeling like this
You could do a self referral to your local iapt, it’s just talking therapies (CBT). I self referred and heard back a week after. I’m currently on the waiting list but we are classed as more priority due to having a baby, waiting is around 4 weeks max so they said. My partner did CBT and found it really helpful and could help with how you’re feeling too. Hope things get better for you soon. Sending lots of strength and love x Edit - I actually got a call tonight to make an appointment for my first session. So from self referring to appointment it’s taken 3 weeks. So very quick x
Agree with above, definitely worth contacting your local IAPT service and also seeing your GP. It can be so hard when you feel you have no control of your life anymore and cant do the things you enjoyed
Yes I feel similar. I was on antidepressants before I fell pregnant so the midwife team couldn’t get me help for it. I went back to the GP and I’m back on the medication. Don’t beat yourself up over it, everything you’re feeling is completely normal! Im the same. Day in, day out it’s the same thing and it really gets to you - I love my baby girl to pieces but there are some nights where dread the next day. Not because of my baby girl, but because it’s the same thing! I also get agitated with my partner even though he’s amazing! Even if I try to do something different it’s still the same routine really. It doesn’t help that I have terrible social anxiety 😂
Thank you all for your responses it’s really helpful I will phone the doctor in the morning x
@Kelsey you literally have just described me in your post!! I feel exactly the same and I get social anxiety too 🙈 I used to be on antidepressants for a few years but have been off them for about 4 years now, was hoping I wouldn’t need them again as I’ve tried so many different ones and could never find one that worked x
Those are definitely signs of depression. I was really, really low after having my baby after a combination of late pregnancy complications, no support system post baby and such a huge life change. I got in touch with the GP because it got to a point where I was crying every single day for multiple hours. They prescribed medication, and honestly it has saved my life and sanity. I’ve also been referred for CBT, but tbh my experience of mental health support in the UK prior to this hasn’t been great, and generally support for new mums is lacking even if it’s better for other demographics. Going on medication is a very personal choice, of course, but as someone who has definitely been helped by it I would encourage you to recommend it. Unfortunately as new mums we don’t always have the time or resources to deal with these things using the same means we might have before due to a lack of time, energy, etc, but medication can and does really help.
Thank you @Sanaa for your reply. Yes I totally agree about the medication, I am open to trying again. I just have a past of trying about 5 different ones but it’s been years and I was in a totally different head space then than what I am now. I know something isn’t right with me, my partner keeps pointing it out too so I will bite the bullet and contact GP. Thank you again x
Please please please seek help. I’m a qualified counsellor and I would definitely say you’re showing signs of PND. You can go and see your GP and they may be able to give you medication to help out short term and put you on the waiting list for counselling. Or if you’re able to go to private there would be no waiting list for you, you can search Counselling directory to find qualified counsellors near by, make sure they’re BACP registered. Is there any changes you can make? I notice you say every day is the same, can you do anything to make the days different? Baby groups? Taking a book to a cafe? Going out for walks with baby during the day? Going for a walk by yourself when dad gets home? Maybe joining an exercise class? Book club? Something that would give you abit of time to yourself and mean you can talk to people about something other than baby? I see you say you can’t go back to work because of childcare issues, just curious to if you live in England?
I could have written this myself, word for word! I don’t feel down and hopeless all the time but it will come out of the blue and it’s almost like a mini panic attack where I feel so down and can’t stop hysterically crying, doubting myself and whether I’m doing enough, missing my life before and the old me, not feeling like myself and absolutely despising my body. I wouldn’t change my life now for anything and I love my little girl and couldn’t be without her but it is so so hard sometimes and it makes me feel even worse because she is a really good easy baby so I feel like I should be fine
@Coadie yes I’m starting a baby group in a couple of weeks which should help. I live a a very rural (and beautiful) area so we do go for some walks nearby which are lovely. My partner works 10am - 10.30pm 5 days a week but when he is around he is amazing I couldn’t ask for a better dad but it does get challenging at times when he’s at work. As for childcare yes I live in England I’ve got a space secured in a nursery for September 2026 unless one comes available earlier. I will be able to work one day a week maybe two if my partner is able to get a set day off (at the moment they vary - he is a chef). I have good days and bad days, find myself very tearful a lot of the time even though I am super happy and in love with my baby girl. It’s a rollercoaster 🙈 x
@Natasha im sorry you’re feeling this way.. it’s such a strange feeling isn’t it! I completely agree with everything you have said. I get really consumed with guilt as if I should be doing more. Also find myself missing my old life and being pregnant 🙈 it’s nice to know that I’m not the only one feeling this way x
Hi, I’ve feel similar and went to the GP this week and diagnosed with postnatal depression and anxiety. He said it’s very common but unlike “baby blues” won’t go away without treatment. I felt better after speaking to him so I’d encourage you to speak to your GP or health visitor about it.