in December 2023 Babies 🇬🇧

Feeling like a failure

So I'm currently 38w+5 and due to be induced on Monday, I had my last midwife appointment before baby comes my midwife offered me a sweep so I accepted, took my bottoms off and laid there under the paper. She did the usual blood pressure, then the doppler to check my baby's heartbeat, get everything ready for the sweep, then she went back to type in my blood pressure, I guess she forgot I had polydramnios because she said she wasn't allowed to do the sweep incase she accidentally broke my waters. I just feel like an absolute failure, as a woman my body should be able to make a baby, right? Just feel so defeated and I've been upset for the whole day, how is something I'm supposed to be able to do biologically be so difficult 😭😭

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You still have plenty of time for baby to arrive on their own! There seems to be so much focus on getting babies out earlier and it’s hard for us all as we feel like they need to come before 40 weeks. It’s even harder at this time of year as we are all wanting our babies to arrive before Christmas! Don’t be hard on yourself … your body has done an amazing thing and you don’t need to be rushed along .. you’ve got this ❤️

I second @Bernadette 😊

Your body is amazing and has done an incredible job! Why induction? Your baby is doing really well and is at term and may want to stay in a little longer. Also most cases of poly are ‘without known cause’ so you shouldn’t beat yourself up over it!

@Sarah I'm being induced at 39 weeks due to severe poly, PGP and severe SPD, and the fact that they don't want me going over 39 weeks 😅

Awww I'm sorry you feel this way! I know it's difficult to do, but try to focus on the fact that for 38w+5 (technically +6 now) you have been growing this little baby and he/she is doing so amazing that he/she doesn't want to leave mama. THAT you have been able to do, not being able to be sweeped is such a small "failure" compare to everything else you've accomplished ❤️

Oh bless you, it sounds tough! Your poly is probably the cause of the other two with the extra weight on your back and pelvis. Ignore the ‘won’t let you’ as you don’t need permission to be pregnant, they can only advise and you are the one who allows them to do things or not. You’re the boss, they’re the helpers, kind of like you’re Father Christmas doing the baby work (delivering the baby/presents) and they’re the elves🤩 is baby engaged? If not make sure they properly go through the risks of cord prolapse from induction with with you, as if baby isn’t engaged but they break your waters or cause you to labour too fast, they increase the risk of your baby getting into difficulties and needing an emergency caesarean. They need to be really transparent with you about the risks they are creating over waiting for spontaneous labour and the increased risk of caesarean from poly but also from induction. Either way, make sure you’ve planned for a c-section outcome just in case xx

And not being able to be swept is not a failure at all in any sense. Your cervix being closed means your baby isn’t ready to be born and your body won’t allow it. Your body is protecting your baby exactly as it should do because it’s normal to have things or fingers there during pregnancy. It’s being a guardian against early labour and infection 😊 your body knows what it’s doing, it just isn’t doing it in the way the guidelines prefer.

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