Why is it that some people in general, some vaginal birth moms and even some c-sections moms look down on c-sections. Some even getting depressed because they couldn't get a vaginal birth. What did you have?

Because c sections aren't the "traditional or natural" way of having a child. I had a emergency c section. Did I want a c section? No. I've personally never looked down on anyone c section or not. But I feel as humans we still have a problem accepting everyone is different. Some people will say " what about the women that plan for a c section, they don't need it for health reasons". I don't care. As long as they had a healthy delivery. And mom and baby are great. That's their decision.

I only found out a couple of years ago that you could have a c-section by choice and it blew my mind because I thought why would you choose that? I thought it was literally only if the mother or baby were in trouble (emergency) obviously no shade because obviously these women have their reasons. Not me personally but I’ve heard women say they just want the easy way out (I know it’s not easy) but they probably mean they don’t have to work hard to get the baby out, that’s what I get from it. Either way tho it doesn’t really matter

I had two vaginal births and think a c-section sounds so much harder due to the recovery! When I was on the maternity ward I felt very thankful to only have a couple of grazes when other women were recovering from c-sections.

C sections are so common now! I would say it’s seen as easier because the pain when actually giving birth is less (you’re numbed after all) and the time it takes is less (some labours can take days). However, recovery is where it’s harder. Maybe people don’t take into account the recovery when weighing up options? Having had a C-section myself (emergency after failed induction) I’d say my experience was easy but I was able to leave the same day (my body recovered extremely quickly from the operation! Others I know were left in hospital for 10 days following a C-section so I guess that understanding of what could happen / reasons for it / etc haven’t really been fully explained to everyone xx At the end of the day, your baby needs to be born in the safes way possible and natural birth isn’t always the safest option in my opinion

I've had both. I don't look down on the C-section, we did what we needed to do to get baby out safely. But I do feel sad that the opportunity to birth my first child vaginally was taken away from me. The C-section recovery was so much harder too.

I had both. I’d much rather had a vaginal than c section but I had twins. The recovery was very difficult but I don’t see it as inferior AT ALL, man it’s tough afterwards. I see both as hardwork a beautiful baby is born after! ❤️ I wish people could be kind to one another.

I had an emergency c-section with my first and it was no question that I was going for an elective c-section with my second! Fantastic experience and recovery both times was absolutely fine. I think there are a lot more horror stories out there about c-sections vs vaginal when in reality, in my experience and from what I’ve seen first hand in person, c-sections at least when planned tend to be fantastic experiences and vaginal can be like 50/50 crazy traumatic.

I had a c section with my first and I didn't expect that my labour would go that way but my baby got stuck at 9cm and nothing we did helped so we ended up in theatre. I begged to be able to push her out I begged the midwifes to pull her out so I could have a "natural" birth.

I had an elective c section for no other reason than I preferred that over a vaginal birth :) No idea why people look down on it but i also don’t care, i made the decision that was best for me and don’t regret it. I’ll be doing it again the next time!

I had a vaginal. I don’t look down upon c-sections. I think anyone who has had to go through that is very strong because I’ve heard recovery can be pretty rough. I may have had a vaginal, but I’ve also had an epidural and a lot of people seem to look down upon that as well. Like saying they’re stronger because they didn’t have one which kind of hurts and is offensive I think.

I have an emergency C-section it's not what I wanted at all and I just felt like I was useless coz I couldn't even give birth to my baby. I was in early labour for a week and then an active induction labour for almost 24hrs and I had only dilated from 2cms to 4cms in that time. I still awful my husband didn't get to cut the cord which I know he really wanted to do as this was our first born and I didn't get to hold my baby right away, it wasn't till an hour later so I missed out on what people call the 'golden hour' which has affected me mentally. Recovery for a C-section is hard I was hospital for 3 days and in the first week I felt useless not being able to do the most basic thing. I have never looked down in women who choose to have a section and never will as it affects you in so many ways but I had a big baby and there was no way I was going to be able to have him vaginally and I now worry about the next time I have a baby and if I'll be able to do it vaginally or have to have a section again

I had an unplanned c section, and although me and the little one are fine, I do feel a bit like I missed out on the experience I expected and wanted. Women can get depressed following a traumatic birth experience even if their birth was great on paper, if it didn't feel right for whatever reason for them. This could even be from people not treating them the way they wanted to be treated in the room. That is to say, if a woman gets depressed because she had a c section it isn't just because she had a c section. There are a whole load of emotions and the experiences and hormones going on making it much more complicated.

I had a vaginal birth and honestly it was manageable, it wasn’t traumatic or anything. My sister had a C section and I witnessed a lot of how hard her recovery was so for me I don’t know why you’d choose to have a surgery unless some sort of medical reason etc but yeah.

I had a C-section (after 27 hours of labour) and also formula fed (I didn't want to breast feed but I also didn't produce any milk) and for the first year after I honestly felt like some mums looked down on me as less of a woman for not going through the 'normal' motherly process. But 3 years on I couldn't care less and would do the same if I had another child

I had an unplanned c section, I wouldn’t call it an emergency because me and baby was fine when we went to theatre. I was stuck at 5cm after 72hours of my waters breaking. I was one of those “depressed” mums who struggled with the outcome for weeks after my birth. I missed out on so much that a vaginal birth experiences, as well as an elective section. As @Zoė said, I didn’t get skin to skin as soon as she was born for the “golden hour”, we didn’t get to cut the cord, it’s something that is never expected for those who want a vaginal birth. Seeing your baby for 2 seconds and then baby being whisked away with your partner for 30 minutes while they stitch you up and handed a baby while you’re helpless because you’re numb from the chest down so there’s nothing you can do to help other than lay there. It’s actually horrible for those who didn’t plan for it to end up that way. Also once you have a section you can also be restricted to how many babies you can actually carry..

I think for a lot of women, they imagine when giving birth it’s a vaginal delivery. So for a lot of women unplanned or true emergency C-section, isn’t something that they ever wanted. Obviously there are a fair few women who do book a C-section cause that’s how they want to give birth and that’s completely up to them. I do believe in the UK culture of “too posh to push” has led to negative connotations around a C-section this is obviously in reference to Victoria Beckham having a C-section and a play on her posh spice singing career. But her C-section I do believe don’t quote me on it was because she’d been in labour for so long or baby was too big. Either way how you give birth is unique to you and nobody should look down on you for how you hopefully safely brought a baby into the world

I don't think theyre inferior. It's just major abdominal surgery and puts the child at increased risk of developing allergies, autoimmunity, obesity, and type II diabetes later on in life. It's also a lot harder to heal from. I had an unscheduled csection for my first and a VBAC for my second. I plan for another VBAC with my third. Like I said i don't look down upon them but I do think for the sake of the child's future health and moms health that if a vaginal birth is warranted then it's best to have vaginal. I do appreciate the fact that csections are an amazing tool that needs to be utilized in certain circumstances! And neither birthing technique makes you a better or worse mom. We are all badasses :)

I’ve never looked down on anyone who opts for it, or has it done. Unfortunately unless you are one of those “depressed” mums after a c section you’ll never understand the thought process we go through after a section that makes us feel like we had our birthing experience taken from us. X

I would like to deliver vaginally but I’m not dumb enough to realize it’ll probably be a c section anyway. Either way just want my healthy baby.

I wouldnt say i was “depressed” from not being able to have a vaginal birth but i was in labour for 24 hours and felt my body had failed me my recovery was awful my baby had reflux and colic and i felt i was robbed of the first few weeks i couldnt get to my baby as fast as id like i also had him during covid i just had an elective just over 3 weeks ago and its been tough i have a toddler i cant play with or pick up i still need to sleep sitting up i think now its like a competition to who had the worst labour or who did what when actually if youve done vaginal or section we should all be bloody proud of what we put out bodies through

I had an EMCS and the reason I got upset was because I dilated had contractions, was induced and ended up needing an EMCS. But I felt I had gone through the whole process and like my body had failed me. But later I've come to terms with it and glad me and bubba are safe and healthy x

I don’t know anyone who would say they are ‘inferior’. But there is a lot of research on vaginal births being better for baby and mum - being squeezed going through the birth canal can get rid of the mucus, gives the baby good bacteria, mums milk comes in quicker. I can’t remember the rest, but there’s a lot of research into why it’s better for health reasons. Having said that, whatever is best for mum and baby overall is definitely due to circumstance. I had an emergency c section and although it was the last thing I wanted, I’m still thankful that my baby got here safely.

I’ve had an emergency c section and had a VBAC. I worked extremely hard to have my VBAC because I really wanted to experience it and I was feeling down and disappointed after having one the first time. I guess you’re told it’s something your body is meant to do, so of course. However I’ll never look down on someone who chooses to have a c section, it’s personal for everyone.

I was suposed to have an elective section. It was my choice, to be safest for baby and most controlled. Baby had other ideas and I had a spontaneous vaginal 2 weeks early . The recovery was soo quick. I’ll never know how I would have faired with a section. I think both can go great, both can be awful. There is no easy option!

@Aimee I've actually had 2 c-sections. so I know exactly what happens mentally to us. I didn't say everyone is depressed, I just meant that 'some' are in the depths of depression because of it and wondered if it was because people or society or whatever has put more importance on vaginal births and was trying to get a better understanding of it.

I've had both and much preferred my elective C-section out of the two personally- the birth experience was far more positive and the recovery was easier but that is due to very individual factors. I don't think it's just about a C-section, I think it's understandable that those who had an emergency section out of their control because of complications may have difficult feelings to process about their birth. My C-section was a very positive experience because it was wanted by me, I knew what to expect and everything went to plan. That isn't the case by everyone who has a C-section. With my vaginal birth I had several complications and other aspects of the experience that made it traumatic for me, it was after my vaginal birth that for a long time I felt like my body had failed. I think there's a lot of info out there that makes you feel like it's your fault when things go wrong even though there are many complications that can happen that nobody can predict or explain.

I’ve had an emergency and an elective. I’ve had HG and cholestasis both pregnancies and was very pleased I booked in an elective the second time as I then developed cholestasis again. It was just the safest option for my babies and after being terrified of loosing my first during birth I really didn’t want to go through that again! But I have experienced some mums saying negative things to me about C-sections (it being the lazy or uneducated option or less good for the baby) I did a hypnobirthing course and was preparing for a water birth the first time around. And I never thought I’d have a C-section. both of mine might not be here without C-sections. They also wouldn’t be here without me taking anti sickness meds and getting IV fluids. My journey was just different and I feel I can safely say that I’d have preferred a natural, more normal pregnancy and birth! everyone has their own challenges and it’s best not to judge anyone. I definitely don’t feel that I had the easy option 🤣

I’ve had two Csections and the recovery of my first one was brutal hence why I didn’t want another one. However my second one (not my choice either) recovering has been a breeze. Its more about the recovery for me rather than the mode of delivery

I had a section. I chose one after thoroughly researching the risks. My choice. I'd gone full circle, initially planned a home birth. I laboured for 14 hours prior in extreme pain as baby arrived a month early. I slept through the section as I was so exhausted. Both types of birth are hard. Birth is birth. All births should be celebrated and every choice and experience respected.

I have to c-section my twins and it was wonderful. I mean the recovery was brutal but the surgery itself was great and I don’t even have a scar. I couldn’t never imagine looking at myself or other c-section mums and thinking less of their delivery experience!

I’ve had both. My first was a vaginal birth. It was at home and in a birthing pool and I loved my experienced. If I could’ve given birth like that every time I’d have like 10 kids 🤣 My second was a c section, she was breech and I found out at 38 weeks and a few days. I had literally 4 days to prepare for the c section and I will say I was scared shitless. I had a lot of anxiety about the unknown and just the idea of needles and being cut open BUT I was surprised with how relaxed I really felt during. It all went really good and the team of drs and nurses were fantastic. It changed my view on c sections (not that I ever thought badly of them) but it definitely made me more open minded to them and reasons why some women would opt for it with out medical reasons. No matter what way someone chooses or has to give birth it IS giving birth. And both have their challenges. I’m proud of my body for doing it naturally but I’m equally as proud of my body for how it handled my second birth.

I had a c section (unplanned) and it is major surgery. Harder to recover from - I think the stigma isn’t towards the woman or person who has a c section but more so why so many end up being pressured into c section when not necessary. I am blessed that I am the only person I know without trauma from my birth experience 🤷🏻‍♀️

I don't think c-sections are "lesser", I think they are harder. The people I know who've had them have had terrible recoveries - though to be fair I only know one person who had a planned one. I think there are people who had a picture of what birth is to themselves and when it didn't go that way it was disappointing. I'll never judge someone for being sad that it didn't go to plan. If some other mf-er tries to tell someone they didn't give birth bc they had a section they deserve to be slapped though, cause that's just stupid. I actually had the inveverse of this hatred with the friend who had a planned c. She was saying how vaginal birth seemed scary to her, and I said section seemed scary to me. We both just told each how impressive and strong the other is for doing something we were scared of. It was lovely.

I don’t think they are inferior. At all. And they’re sometimes necessary. I just think it’s a major abdominal surgery, and when not needed, kind of silly to opt for. Given the benefits for mom and baby of vaginal birth. Recovery process, etc. People can do what they want, but hopefully they’re fully informed.

My first two were vaginal, my third was an emergency c section 9 months ago and I still feel sad about it, I feel like I never gave birth to my baby, it was so much harder to recover from and I feel like I missed out on delivering him properly, I’m so thankful he’s happy and healthy but I still feel like I didn’t have him 🙁

I didn’t say you said everyone is depressed either, I just quoted what you used to describe the situation. And when I went on to say unless you were one of those mums who had a section and felt that way you’d never understand, I wasn’t specifically talking about you - just in general! I think it’s more of an individual circumstance rather than social.. I believe those who have more of a social stance on it like someone mentioned about the whole too posh to push thing usually haven’t had a c section.Oh I would like to add, like @Kate said, it was extremely disappointing that I ended up in a section because I had zero complications my whole pregnancy, even during my labour I had none.. I just wasn’t dilating quick enough after my waters had gone and it was basically a race against the clock, I was on pitocin for the day on maximum dose having contractions a minute apart and I was still going strong with only gas and air and still me and baby wasn’t stressed - my body done me amazing…

It didn’t take away the fact that I felt a disconnect from my baby because one minute she was in me and the next I’m being handed her in my arms 30 minutes after she was born.. it was more mentally challenging than physically - recovery was also rather easy for me again no complications.. - it really is individual, because as plenty have mums have mentioned who opted for an elective, they wouldn’t have felt the same way, electives and unplanned sections also have complete different experiences - even if it isn’t an “emergency” per say x

After my first section (an emergency after developing sepsis during labour), I was gutted that I hadn’t given birth vaginally. Mostly because I’d prepared myself for it, and kind of wanted to experience it in a way? I also had never had any form of medical procedure before so having major surgery to get my baby out just wasn’t the way I’d wanted it to go. That being said, I came to terms with it and have just had my second section. Sections absolutely aren’t inferior in the slightest, there isn’t a one size fits all or one way of birth is better than the other.

As someone who was coerced into an “emergency” c section that I later found out wasn’t necessary, I don’t think either is inferior. I think doctors are money hungry and cut happy and will do c sections when not medically necessary and use scare tactics to make mothers think it’s in their best interest when really it may not be. And they never include all the risks and potential side effects of all the things that come with c sections. I was fortunate enough to go on and have 3 unmedicated VBACs and they were so much easier all the way around than my first labor/delivery was. For me, it’s more about informed consent and telling the real side effects. C sections are great medical advancements when needed and they don’t make a mom any less of a mom. It just makes me so mad when someone is coerced into it.

I also think there needs to be greater education around the language used regarding C-sections. Obviously you have an elective C-section where somebody will choose to have that as their preferred method of birth then you have an unplanned C-section which is what most people have because they go in for a vaginal delivery and end up with the section, this is why they are awake and have the baby .And then you have a true emergency C-section where you are put to sleep so baby can be born.

@Emma not all emergency c sections are where the mother is put to sleep. There are 3 categories of an emergency c section and even with category 3 which is what you may be referring to as ‘true’ emergency, mother can still be awake. An ‘unplanned’ section is actually less common than an emergency c section. Most women don’t attempt labour to have to go into theatre and have a c section.

@Melanie actually there are four category one is the most severe when mums are put to sleep, due to haemorrhaging, placental abrupctions uterine rupture etc.,Category two is where fetal and maternal life is not immediately threatened so often is unplanned because of fetal distress and Mum can be awake for these. Category three is earlier delivery or such things as a breach babies. And category four is the elective C-section. A was

@Emma sigh! A category 1 does not always require a mother to be put to sleep. Either way all the categories (or at least the the first 2) are classed as emergency, so I would be mindful of telling someone that their c section was ‘unplanned’ rather than an emergency.

I had a c section and I "loved" it. Wouldn't have wanted it any other way. I will also be doing the same with the next baby.

I’m so glad I had a c-section! I don’t feel like it’s inferior at all and I don’t care if people do. I didn’t have a choice. We would’ve both died. It still hurt like hell . Recovery while taking care of a tiny baby with stitches and glued stomach was difficult. And I’m sure caring for a new born with stitches in your fucking vagina feels like hell too. It all hurts! It’s all difficult. We should all just be supportive of each other instead of judging. What a weird opinion to have of another woman who’s gone through this journey.

@Melanie mine was categorised as a Cat 2, but nothing about it was an emergency.. so I think again individual basis does matter x

@Melanie my point is many mums do not know that their section was unplanned not an emergency. My point is there needs to be clearer education around the term C-section.

I had an emergency c-section, and I could easily see how the lack of control over the experience could send mothers into depressive feelings & general grief of their ideal birth. My experience was much more positive than I went in expecting honestly, so that’s not the boat I am personally in, but I can absolutely see how it happens at all.

I couldn’t tell you why people look down on them. No matter how a woman gives birth, whether that’s vaginal or via c section, it is an amazing achievement and something to be so proud of. I had a c section because my baby was breech. With the way she was positioned, there would’ve been a high chance that I or she or both could’ve died if I birthed her vaginally. So for the people who say “it’s the easy way out,” it really isn’t!

I had an elective C-section and loved every moment of it even recovery. I didn’t have to worry about waiting for labour to start, didn’t have to worry about baby getting stuck or any tearing. I was out walking 2 days after