Wedding advice.
Show your support
Depends on the kind of friendship you have/want. We're only doing two bridesmaids/groomsmen each so some of my friends will not be in the wedding party even though they are very important to me. They have all still been more than willing to help with planning/talk through things. I've also helped friends whose wedding I was not in myself.
Maybe next time she asks your advice on something just (half)jokingly say "have you asked your bridesmaids? Don't get me wrong I love chatting about your wedding but I don't think I'm qualified to be giving this advice" 😅
I feel like just because she’s chosen her bridesmaids though, maybe they don’t have the life experience to be giving wedding advice like maybe they haven’t been married themselves? Then it’ll make sense that she’d ask a friend who HAS been married, for upcoming wedding advice, even though you aren’t a bridesmaid? Because you’ve done prior research and maybe they haven’t. I dunno just a thought I had.
I’d ask her outright as Some people think it’s rude to make someone who is married a bridesmaid. On the other hand from personal experience: One of my extremely (or so I thought) close friends did this to me but I genuinely didn’t care but when I joked about not being on her train she sent me like a message so long on WhatsApp I had to click more so many times… 10 years of friendship and I didn’t know she harboured so much animosity against me (which was all made up in her head) we cleared the air, I never lost my cool and were still friends till now
Yeah I think it depends. I love helping people out and giving advice on things like this. Sure it’s a bummer you’re not one of them but maybe still help but also let her know that she could ask her bridesmaids since they will be with her for majority of the time and they’ll be able to help more
I think it depends how close you are. Friends of ours got married last year (husband was a groomsmen, I wasn't asked to be a bridesmaid but didn't expect to be) and we're their only married friends so we gave advice if asked but none of it was major decisions, more about timelines for choosing things, sending invites etc. If she keeps asking for your opinion, I'd gently say "I'm glad you value my opinion but I think decisions like bridesmaid dresses etc should be made by the bridesmaids".. It may be she wants you as one and if you're really close, she assumed you knew she'd want you as one. My husband wasn't going to actually ask his 2 best friends to be his best men as he figured they would know that but I told him he needed to actually ask
Next time she messages you, just say to her surely you would be better off asking one of your bridesmaids for their opinion.
Depending on the type of relationship you have, if definitely say something. I'd go with a light-hearted comment to see what the response is like. Something like "all of this advice seems very much like "bridesmaid duty", have you chosen your bridesmaid yet?" to see what comes back from it. Have you seen her in person since she's chosen? Could she maybe be waiting to see you to ask in person?