Has anyone ever gone through sever gender disappointment to the point they got an abortion?
This is my second child and we just found out the gender and I went though this with my first baby and to find out it’s not the sex we want again has been very difficult for both me and my partner. I can’t come to terms caring a baby full term that I don’t feel is mine. There is a lot of shame on my behalf for feeling like this and it does stem from a cultural background. If we were to terminate I would go through ivf next time to ensure it’s the gender we want and never have kids again, but I was curious if anyone has ever gone through this or how to deal with these negative feelings?
Show your support
Hi. Can you message me. I recently had the same experience that I’m having the same gender and we really want the opposite. We plan to have this one but now I keep looking up things like IVF for next time. So expensive but might be worth it for us. I feel so guilty. I hope you message me back. I would love to talk to someone like me.
Trending in our community
I experienced gender disappointment with my first pregnancy although not to the extreme point of abortion. I belong to a culture where havimg a boy takes precedence over a girl. So I guess that's where the pressure came in and got me. To have a boy and please everyone. I took me a few weeks to come into acceptance...and now my girl is 2 years old and I wouldn't trade her for anything. I'd like to ask, when your first child was born, did those feelings go away? Or did they continue to linger, perhaps preventing a bond with your baby? I'm really sorry you feel this way and those cultural pressures you may experience. I think also think the reason you may be feeling it so strongly is because your partner also feels it strongly. In my case my husband was the exact opposite and was very happy to have a girl...and seeing him made me at ease and come to an acceptance. It's sort of like both of you are digging this hole deeper and pushing each other in...