Extra protection.

Girls how would you feel if your partner was pushing the use of condoms knowing exactly how you feel about the situation. I’ve explained to him more than a hundred times I can’t use them not because I don’t want to (even though I don’t) but because afterwards I get really irritated down below I get sore and itchy and it feels like something is stuck inside me when there isn’t and it lasts about 2/3 days every time I’ve gave in because I’ve wanted him in me. But I can’t give in any more the last few times we’ve gone to have sex it hasn’t happened there’s been loads of other stuff we still make each other 💦 but it’s not the same and I feel bad but I just physically cannot with condoms. I’m on the implant and I take the pill to stop my periods haven’t had one in over a year and my partner knows this. We’ve been together near 7 years and have two kids which I think is ridiculous to push condoms now we have two kids he never cared before when he was spreading his seed. I get he’s anxious because both kids did happen on contraception in the first place but I have double now. I’m at the point of saying ‘let’s just go back to normal sex and I’ll get a test each month and show you I’m not pregnant’ because it’s either that or I’m gonna have to tell him we can’t sleep together anymore and we may as well end the relationship because it’d be pointless being in a sexless relationship. I love him and that’s the last thing I want but I cannot let him pressure me into using something I’m not comfortable with especially when I’ve told him how it affects me and he hasn’t listened 🤷🏼‍♀️ he got silicone ones because I’m allergic to latex that’s the only thing he actually listened to🤣 Don’t even know what the point of this post is I just need a rant because I don’t know what to do; don’t want it to end because we’re in a good place but not allowing myself to be pressured into using them.

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Are you guys done with kids? If so, is sterilisation not an option for him?😅 like, if he's so concerned about not having another kid (which is totally valid) then surely that's the logical next step for him? With that, and you yourself using 2 forms of birth control, obviously nothing is 100% but you guys should be pretty safe 😅

Could try latex free? May be an allergy to latex.

His hesitation is completely valid if you got pregnant twice with contraception. I agree with @Donna Woods maybe you need an alternative type of condom. I personally wouldn’t take the risk of your testing every month. What if you were pregnant?

@Donna Woods I was going to say the same, I would want to try and find a reason why you feel like that. Plus maybe he has other reasons why he wants to sleep with condoms only and is not telling you

I think you should try different types of condoms, totally get it from both sides but if it was a man refusing to wear them and a woman wanted them to - people would be saying well no sex unless he wears one then, so would be unfair to pressure him to do it when he doesn’t want to especially if you were on contraception when conceiving the other 2 children!

@Lauren I’m getting sterilised I’m waiting for the hospital to ring me over it they’ve had my referral since our youngest was born he’s nearly 2; we’re both done with kids; I understand of course why he wants to use them and I’ve tried a good few times x

@Cass I know I completely get that which is why I’m looking for advice because it’s not fair to either of us x

@Zuzana I’ve asked him about the reasons and he’s said because ‘even though you’re on both it’d be your luck with having no periods they cancel each other out and I’d feel at more at ease’ so I understand but he’s not understanding where I’m coming from either x

@Donna Woods we’ve been using silicone ones because I am allergic to latex 😔 it’s just a nightmare finding a common ground x

Wait why is he not just getting a vasectomy? It’s the easiest fastest procedure in the universe

Have you tried alternative condoms? It could be an allergy/sensitivity to latex or silicone. I had a similar problem and it just took some trial and error trying to find a brand that worked for us. I do understand his hesitation if you got pregnant on contraception twice.

@MK I completely understand it as well I’m just sick of the feeling afterwards and not really feeling nothing during cos they’re just horrible haha x

@Trish it can reverse itself I know it’s a small percentage but it can happen haha and I think he’s not because I’m on the list to be sterilised x

Sounds like you have a latex allergy. If he insist on condoms just tickle his fancy and try latex free ones if you still react then yeah you're unfortunately your body really don't like condoms

@Helen we’ve tried silicone ones that’s what we have been using and I’m still the same I couldn’t have anything latex cos I know I have an allergy to it x

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