Second baby

People told me to wait a few years in between because having a baby is hard enough, forget 2. But my philosophy is that id rather spend 2 years of my life back to back dealing with pregnancy and healing and never have to do it again once im all healed up and back to normal lol. Plus why go through baby trenches once, wait years, then do it again? Why not just get all the hard stuff out of the way at once

I had my first in 2020 and then my second 2021 and my third 2022(was a surprise baby ) and my fourth 2025 honestly it really just depends on you but I agree with the previous comment . It’s never easy having a toddler and baby but it doesn’t stay hard forever .

@Silver that’s my exact thinking too!! I just don’t think my family would agree with me, just so torn about what’s best to do. And especially for my first baby.

I've done it both ways. I have 4 boys - 22yrs, almost 16 years, 15 months, and 12 weeks! I will say that all age gaps have their pros and cons, and it really depends on how you feel and what you want for your family. I agree that there isn't a "right time". I do feel that this time for me is better with 2 babies. But in the sense that I am already doing diapers, breastfeeding and pumping, sleep schedules, etc. And I am so excited for when they are bigger and have a buddy to play with. I'm also older at 39, and have done the whole gamut before.

Also, all that matters is what you and your husband/partner want to do with your family. You're adults and no one gets to make those decisions for you.

@Andrea oh wow that’s amazing! I would love them to be close in age but worry as I only have a 2 bed house and can’t afford to move to a bigger house and I worry about them eventually having to share rooms at the different ages and whether it’ll disturb them etc.

My kids are 8yrs, almost 3yrs, and a baby due in October! I was worried about the age gaps originally (the first gap was due to not wanting to be preggo during Covid) but now I’m finding it was probably for the best (for our family) due to childcare costs!! Since our eldest started school when the middle started daycare, it was always only one daycare bill! (Though still pricey at $1,600/mo) But now with the new baby, we will have a period of time with TWO kids in daycare (even after my maternity leave) and that will be costing us $3k per month for both before the middle starts Prek (we sadly don’t have help from others) THAT is the only big thing (for us) that I think is where age gaps mattered. Otherwise, the current two are BEST FRIENDS even with a 5 year gap! 🥰 and both are excited for the new baby to come!

Im not sure if I’ll have a second. Husband is pretty firmly in the one and done camp and I was too until I look at my two month old who gives me baby fever. My mom had my brother and I 18 months apart. She loved it as we were often in similar play stages. She’s also worked most of her life in child care and sees benefits of waiting longer of having them close. Your doctor will likely recommend you wait a year or two to try again so your body can heal and support the next pregnancy most effectively. You can always use that time to consider what works best for you.