Mental Health Friendship Struggle

Anyone have any friendly suggestions for this momma… so I struggle with bipolar and BPD so the last few days have been a real struggle for me not with my kids just with everything in general and I’m not sure what to do at this point… feel stuck..

I have done the below plus others for as long as I can remember but the symptoms have intensified since I had my second baby 2 years ago. I’m struggling with how I’m feeling day to day with the over stimulation while looking after my children and constantly feel guilty that I’m letting them down because of the way I am and want to know what to do. I’ve done some research and feel like I may have adhd, doesn’t anyone have adhd? Could I have it? What should I do?

I am going through some changes and i know it's not normal I do have mental health concerns and I'm starting therapy. I have to. I been married for 10 years I have a 5 yr old son. Our marriage has been a roller coaster of emotions a lot of yelling arguing just a real mess. I went to a program for over a year got a house had a job and then my husband came back. When I lost my job I relapsed. Okay so now I'm just down to 420 friendly. I have anxiety agoraphobia bi polar disorder PTSD I can't even bring myself to go out side it's like the hardest thing ever. I don't have a support system but I am about to start therapy and my son to. I'm so angry at my husband. He cheated with my best friend for 2 years and when I found out shorty after I went to a rehab program. I thought I was past it after a year but I never dealt with it I just swept it to the side. But it broke me it broke my spirit. I finally asked myself why so much anger I'm not happy I'm hurting my son disrespects me like his dad. It's a mess I'm so tired and worn down that I just wanna give up. I hate myself because I'm so tired of him being here and not helping that I thought about leaving and never looking back. Sorry for the rant

So beautiful

So we currently live in Texas with only the ability to have one income due to not being able to afford two kids in daycare. If I was to get a job, we would lose the kids medical and adding them onto my Husband‘s medical would cost us more than I would be able to make to cover daycare and medical. I’m currently in school and will be doing intern hours in a year. When the intern hours hit, I will need both kids in daycare. We have been thinking about moving to a different state where family can help with watching the kids so they do not have to go to daycare while I do my intern hours. my husband’s family who is in Texas thinks I should put off my intern hours until both kids are in school and that will be another three years. currently we make enough to get by, but it’s not enough to save any money or to pursue my education in the timeline we want. once I get my degree we are looking at a significant pay jump, they think that getting a better job opportunity which my husband has found for $10 more an hour is better than me getting my education and getting a job that makes $50 more an hour overall so then our combined income would be about $70 an hour compared to just having $20-$30 an hour. Would you move for the faster raise or wait it out to please the family and then in 4 years have a higher income