Rough times

This past year has been a very tough year for me. I lost my dog of 13 years first. Then my dad had 2 heart attacks and is still recovering almost a year later. He can have another one. He's on this medicine for the rest of his life. I'm so worried I'm going to lose him. Then a few months ago I lost my baby. Which I still have trouble getting over. I have really bad anxiety and had an anxiety attack about it just a couple days ago. I live in total fear that if I get pregnant again I will lose the baby again. I also have a new irrational fear of losing my 3 year old son. I am so terrified I could lose him too. Do any of you have that problem after a miscarriage? And to top it all off my husband and I have been having issues. Last night he pretty much told me I'm not a good enough mom or wife and that I'm lazy. He says our son doesn't talk alot because I'm not a good enough mom. That I don't spend time with him. But tbh all of my day is put into being a mother and wife. I never get anytime to myself. Can't even take a 5 min shower without interruption and my husband telling me he doesn't want to keep an I on our son. He doesn't spend any time with him at all or me for that matter. And he said I'm the one who isn't good enough. Because the house isn't squeaky clean. And I don't cook a ton. Why are mother expected to be super human but men aren't. Why are we expected to help everyone, drive everyone around, clean, cook, parent, and teach our kids school work , and also find a job all at the same time.