OCD husband, anyone else dealing with something similar?
Hi ladies, keeping this anonymous as it’s a sensitive topic.
My husband has been diagnosed with contamination OCD, he’s been symptomatic for roughly 2 years, but it’s progressively gotten worse. It rules our lives!
A few examples;
- When we enter the house, we remove our shoes, step into our sliders and go straight into the shower, - If we collect delivery’s from downstairs (we live in an apartment), we have to shower when we return
- He takes our phones when we get home, and he thoroughly sanitises them
- our kids aren’t allowed by the front door, bathroom (without supervision),
- I’m not allowed to step into our utility or store room without taking a shower afterwards
- we aren’t allowed guests at our home
- there is no longer any kind of physical affection between us, my love language is physical touch, so this is a big one for me
Whilst I sympathise with my partners mental health, it’s having a detrimental affect on our marriage, and our family, I’ve read that I shouldn’t enable his compilations, so I have started to refuse to do certain things, this has resulted in HUGE arguments, him telling me to f*** off, and leave with the kids…
I can only take so much, I’m beginning to feel worthless, undesired, and just unwanted in my marriage… please help, any advise would be greatly appreciated !
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I can totally understand. My husband obsessive cleans cars and the garage. We make special trips just to wash vehicles. We have to vaccum our garage ...even the window seals weekly and sometimes daily. He cleans his shoes daily and clips his toenails daily. We can not leave the house without laundry all up and dishwasher emptied. This is driving me crazy!!! We do everything over and over and never get anything done.
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Oh wow hun it sounds like you are dealing with a lot. That must be exhausting for you to deal with on a daily basis while trying to raise healthy-minded kids. Have you sought out therapy? It sounds like he's over anxious and could really benefit from pharmacological help. I realize asking him about therapy could escalate things (which we don't want) so is there a place you could go stay and be safe with your kids until you confront him about it? Because honestly, it doesn't sound like a safe environment for your children and I'm sure you're aware of that which is the reason you're reaching out. If he loves his children he'll understand why you've left (temporarily)and perhaps it will urge him to get help. My other suggestion, though it may sound strange I'm serious, is to contact Dr. Phil. He has actually helped 2 of my friends ( 1 was televised and 1 was not) and it has changed their lives dramatically for the better. Unbeknownst to the public, he actually reads the emails that come in.