Partner being unreasonable
Hi Mum's,
About a week ago, my partner decided that he didn't like me saying "can you" in a "can you please grab that for me" way.
I'm making an effort to ask for help in more creative ways.
I have 1 million things going through my head constantly and feel I should be able to just ask him in any way, albeit politically.
Tonight, he asked me to also not ask, "Would you?"
I feel like I'm better off not speaking at all.
I'm not expecting anyone to have a similar issue. It's so ridiculous! I think I needed to vent!
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Damn, what does he want?! Does he mean that he wants you to tell him instead of ask, I.e. “hey, grab that for me”?
If not, tell him you’re happy to do it but he needs to tell you how he’d like you to ask!! Good for him to communicate if he’s upset with something, but there’s no need for it to be a guessing game for you lol. Ask him to tell you what wording would be better from him and just go from there in seeing if you’re comfortable incorporating it 🤷♀️
What if you just say "I need..." or "I want..."?
Like Kayla said, ask him what his preferred way would be. You can’t read his mind so he needs to tell you. You shouldn’t need to weave your way around requests, he needs to give you a way that works for him.
@Jessica thank you! Yeah I'm trying to ask in different ways. Sometimes, can you or would you just fall out of my mouth.
God as if mums don’t have enough to worry about without also having to second guess the way you ask for support. I’d tell him to get a grip tbh. It sounds like what he wants is you to just not ask at all🙄 does he ever ask you to grab things for him etc, I bet he says it the same way if he does
Looks like he’s searching for a reason to get onto you! Anyone who wants to be mad/annoyed at petty stuff like that is having a deeper issues most likely. IMO
@Isobel of course! At the same time, I do a lot for him. Probably before he needs to ask
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