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September 2023 Babies 🇺🇸

Sick dog and I’m due in 3 weeks with first baby

I’m struggling like crazy over here.. my first baby, my sweet doggie girl has been battling liver cancer for over a year. But I took her in to the vet today and they told me that her liver tumors have grown, fairly substantially, and that they may be starting to spread. She’s feeling off, but not showing me that it’s time yet.

The scary thing is that I’m due on the 27th with my first child. Annie, my dog is 9, almost 10 and is my heart and soul. I can’t just make the decision to put her down, but I’m incredibly scared that she will get worse while I’m in the hospital with the baby and that I won’t be there when she passes. It would kill me if she was alone and in pain. But I’m also terrified of letting her go too soon. What if we do have more time?

Being due so soon is stressing me out so much. If I wasn’t due yet, I would just let her be and let her tell me when she’s ready. I’m so so so sad to think that she might not be there to meet her baby sister. I knew she was sick, but because she was doing fine a few weeks ago, I had told myself that she would be here.

And how do I grieve while having a newborn? This is supposed to be joyful time in our lives, but I can’t see how to cope with this.