Should I be worried?
Hey!
So I have a 12 year old daughter. I found out recently she was talking to a boy she met online. At first she told me that she knew him through school and I believed her. She then showed me the messages between them both and it was clear he wasn’t at the same school as her. I think he’s from down England. He’s also said things like “I think we should break up, because your mum doesn’t want us to be together” i think that’s weird… I told her not to speak to him because she didn’t know him. I tried to explain to her the dangers of talking to people online. (People saying they are kids when they aren’t) she’s not really understanding the dangers and just thinks i am nagging. So anyway , I told her to block this boy, she did. I also said not to add him again, because she doesn’t know him. Today I found out she had unblocked him and was speaking to him again. She didn’t tell me tho, I found out when a notification from this person popped up on her phone, I didn’t go through it. I asked her to delete TikTok because she had broken my trust. She done it straight away, but I fear this is only the beginning. Anytime you ask for her phone she has a full blown meltdown and tells us not to go through it, she turns her phone away when I’m standing next to her, I understand kids need privacy and I value her privacy.. but when does it get tp the point that I should check her phone. It’s a scary world out there and yes.. I know I’m overly protective but that’s because as a child I was allowed to do whatever I wanted with no consequences. This led to me meeting random people online, getting pregnant at 16., being in scary situations. Im just scared. Does anyone have any advice on what I can do?
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Sorry, no advice but you keeping her away from that boy or whoever he is, is best. Great mum, well done
I don't want this to scare you but please feel free to use them as examples for your daughter. My sister spoke to someone she met on a chat when she was about 14, my aunt recognised his email address (as they used to talk) and ended up telling my sister that she was taking the keyboard and deleted him and said she was reporting him to the police. He had told my sister he was also 14 and they had arranged to meet but hadn't yet. I also spoke to someone who I had been chatting to for over 6 months when I was 14 and ashamed to say I took a top less selfie (still had bra on) turns out it was my so called friends and they plastered my picture around the school, I could have got them charge for containing inappropriate pictures of a child and they would have went on the sea offenders register and to a young offenders home. I didn't think my embarrassment was worth running their lives. There are lots of charities out there for advice on this subject to help protect children and teenagers online...
If you go onto Google then it will give you some tips. Not had to go through it myself but from experience (of my sister) the more you tell her not to do it the more she will likely do it 🙄 I would explain to her the dangers as you have and contact the charities on further help. If you go through her phone she may end up not trusting you and then not come to you when she needs help. Again also speaking from experience. I know this sounds pretty shit but feel free to DM me for more advice, if you contact your GP discreetly they may also be able to offer advice. Good luck xo
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