Men

Say something. Some men need to be told exactly what they can do to help you.

My husband was very negative around that time too. I talked to him about how I expected him to help and how it upset me when he would just get to live his life and expect me to just take care of our newborn by myself without giving me some time when he got home. My husband is back to work now so I do most of the night stuff but he does do a couple diaper changes at night. I also have asked him to give me time before he leaves for work to get myself together for the day and then he has him by himself after he gets home so I can shower and nap. Just figure out what works for you guys but men unfortunately need to be told exactly what to do when it comes to newborns. I will say my husband is much more positive now when interacting with me and our 5 week old so hopefully you will get there too!

my man is the same way. im so sorry. it’s extremely frustrating to be expected to take care of baby alone. let me know if you ever need someone to talk to. us mamas stick together ❤️

I had an argument/conversation with my husband about this and he ended up telling me that he was scared to be responsible for the baby because he didn't know how to take care of her. Now it doesn't make me mad to have to ask him for help or tell him what he needs to do, and he's much more helpful now that he knows what we need.

Mine will tell me to wake him up, then doesn’t wake up, and it got to the point that I was getting so angry that I’ve now said I’m default parent. Out of a month he still doesn’t get it, he tries but only on his days off. Besides that I have watched the sun come up so many times with a fussy baby. I’ve learned to nap when baby naps. I wish I knew what to say to get men to understand, but sometimes it’s better to figure out a routine that works for you and baby.

I'm sorry, that's so rough 😞 maybe you guys could plan for him to watch the baby for a few hours before he goes to bed or in the morning so that you can get some uninterrupted rest then? Obviously it's not the same as getting help at night, but at least you could get a little more sleep!

since he works he wants to play video games when he gets home. 🥲 I couldn’t keep cooking, cleaning, pumping, and watch baby because it burnt me out

Yea my ex was like that. Gamed all night was gone at work all day and did nothing with the baby. I have a partner this time around who participates and I don’t feel that rage. I’ve gotten slightly snippy every once in a while bc lack of sleep and hormone drops will do that , but my ex made me rage cry.

Talk to him, if he doesn’t get involved or take responsibility for his behavior and learn to help, that shit likely won’t change . I wish I would have left my ex years sooner

my husband sleeps through the baby crying. Like how Tf do they do that! At this point it’s more of a hassle to wake him to help than doing it myself.

Exactly like you are already awake