Unsure about trying for a second
I’d love for my little girl to have a sibling, I’m very close with my brother and the thought of her being an only child makes me sad. If I’m being honest though I hated being pregnant and I hate the idea of being pregnant again. It feels like I should sacrifice that for her but I just struggle with it and then feel guilty about being selfish and it just becomes a cycle.
Not only that but it was a real struggle just to have her. I have fertility problems and IVF was such a long, painful and emotional process, not to mention expensive. We got really lucky to have success with her and I honestly don’t know if we’d have that again. It makes me hesitant to try for a second because I don’t know if it’s worth the heartbreak if it isn’t successful. I don’t know really what I’m looking for in this post, maybe just if anyone has gone thought similar thoughts or concerns before or has words of reassurance or advice.
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Its not selfish to not want to be pregnant again. Its your body.
So don't feel selfish for that.
I get the feeling of wanting your child to have a sibling. I am so close to my sister I want that for my child too but also there is no gatantee they will be close. That would be between them and the relationship they cultivate.
Have a second because you want too. If you don't want to go threw pregnancy again or threw that process than don't and thats 100% okay.
Do whats best for you 💖
I can really relate to this, I’m so desperate for my little boy to have a sibling to grow up with as my siblings were much older than me and it was lonely.. but I had him at 29 weeks due to complications and know there’s a 40% chance of it happening again and im so fearful we won’t get as lucky and bring a healthy baby home again if it happens again.
So I can’t give you any advice and although for it’s for different reasons I can relate and I’m sorry you’re feeling the way you are x
thank you. This is such compassionate and good advice and something I needed to hear.
that sounds so scary, I can’t imagine! It’s so hard to balance the fear of failure with what we actually want.
I’m 34 and pregnant with my first. It’s been horrible. I have hg and now have been diagnosed with anemia causing me to get iron infusions. I desperately prayed for twins because I hate being pregnant so much but didn’t want to have an only child. Now as I continue to struggle I’m choosing to make peace with the fact that unless we adopt she won’t have a sibling. It’s hard but the strain pregnancy has put on me physically, mentally and emotionally is not worth it. Not to mention financially as most of my pregnancy has been spent on disability and FMLA. I also think it would be too much on my relationship. Don’t let anyone make you feel guilty for your choices concerning your own health and well being. 💜
sending you lots of hugs and love, you’re almost there! I really hated it as well, and it’s hard because so many people have such wonderful pregnancy experiences that it’s easy to feel guilty. It’s nice to hear that from other moms as well. I hope your final few weeks are easier!
I understand you! I’ve just been told that I can have maximum 1 other pregnancy. And even that might not be the best thing for me healthwise. So we are having to way up our options on growing our family.
Have you maybe considered whether adoption would be an option for you? I know it’s not for everyone, but it’s one way to give your child a sibling without going through another pregnancy.
Just a thought 🤷🏼♀️
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