Who to tell and how soon

We told family before the 12 weeks but I made an official announcement after 12 weeks to everyone. But it’s up to you and your husband. Not anyone else to announce.

We waited until the 12 week mark to tell family. After the main family knew we told everyone else well, at least for my side of the family we told everyone else about a month after that and for just random people we waited until my baby was here and then we posted it on social media and stuff because those people didn’t matter for lack of better words lol.

We have only told a small handful of trustworthy people... I'm at 30 weeks. We will tell others (including family) at around 3 weeks postpartum. Privacy is worth more than gold. People can't ruin what they don't know. Go with your gut, Mama 💕

We only told parents after the 12 week mark. MIL kept insisting to tell DHs siblings but we held our ground until we were ready (after the 20 week scan) and said its for personal health reasons when we tell and she had to accept it, as its not her news to tell. I'm sure she wants the extended family to know too but given we delayed telling DHs siblings she can only assume we will be telling other people after birth. They should be so lucky to know the information, given her positive reaction she will be privvy to more, had she not been we wouldve kept things from her and she would be the one to regret it.

I told my closest friends immediately because they're who I would turn to for support if anything happened. I'm 10 weeks now, and we just told family last week. My family has a hard time keeping things to themselves, so I made sure I was comfortable with everyone in the family knowing before I told my Mom. We still haven't told everyone but will at the 12 week mark.

This is YOUR news and not anyone else's to tell. It's perfectly find if you don't want to tell everyone. Maybe MIL can discuss it with your Mom or someone else who already knows if that will help get it out of her system, but she can't just run around telling everyone if you're not comfortable with it. ♥️

Tell people when you are ready I been found out about my pregnancy and my family is just now finding out this week and it was for the same reason cause as soon as I told my mom she started telling everybody she seen

We told our family don’t say anything until we post and share the news ourselves. And quite frankly it’s not her business to tell. I get she’s excited to be a grandma but dang

Echoing the others, this is your big news to share, when and how you feel comfortable. I’m at 12 weeks rn with my second, and I’ve already told my mom and sister, as well as close friends. I think we will tell my husbands family, and others on social media, next week after my ultrasound.

We told very close family (parents and siblings) at 12 weeks and didn’t tell close friends until around 15 weeks. Didn’t announce to wider friends/ social media until after the anatomy scan when we were sure all was well. It’s all about what you’re comfortable with and for me this worked perfectly and I’d do the same again x

Regardless of when you and your husband choose to feel comfortable to share this information your mother-in-law should never have free reign to just tell whoever she wants. I've had two very high risk pregnancies and we told selective people but we're very clear that if we told someone they were not to tell anyone else cuz it wasn't their business to be telling. With my first pregnancy we didn't tell people Outside immediate family until I was 19 weeks. This time we announced it at 15 weeks. I was very firm with my mother-in-law this time because she threw a hissy fit that my sister knew before her daughter. Because people like to think they have a right to something that they don't. I'm honestly not finding out the gender of my baby because my mother-in-law has already irritated me about how much she wants a boy. Good luck hold firm to your boundaries.

don’t let society pressure you into feeling as if you have to announce at a certain point. announce when you feel comfortable, it’s your pregnancy not anyone else’s.

My in laws knew before first trimester because they were visiting and it’s hard to hide HG. My family knew after first trimester and the official announcement wasn’t until almost third trimester (high risk pregnancy, so lots of ultrasounds, my husband wasn’t comfortable until those scans were done) we tried to limit who knew but my MIL couldn’t help herself, we didn’t mind because most of the people that she knew were people we didn’t know and didn’t feel we would need to say anything no if for some reason something went wrong.

You are the pregnant one, I completely think it's up to you, if you want to control who knows then you should be able to
She's the mother "in law" not the baby's mother so she shouldn't have "free reign" if you don't want her to

After a miscarriage I was very nervous about sharing the news so told immediate family (parents and siblings) after our 8 week private scan and did share with anyone else till after our anatomy scan (at 20 weeks)
I asked family not to share it before then. Ultimately it’s not their news to share, it’s yours and your partners they have no right to take over.

I told my boss at 4 weeks and 1 day. Everyone is different. You do what works for you.

12 weeks for family and friends. 20 week scan for social media. Tell your MIL to F off… this won’t be the last boundary she pushes you on so make it clear it’s not ok

Only my mom knew before 12 weeks and his brother (who over heard) but didn’t tell his parents till 12 weeks (I was high-risk as well and wanted to make sure things were okay before we told them)

People knew I was pregnant when they saw me - I didn’t put anything on social media and told family at 14 weeks (it fell over a weekend at home which was lovely 🥰)

It’s not their news to tell so just ask them not to.

Everyone is different but a friend regrets massively telling the world at 10 weeks and then 4mths later fighting off the questions on how are you feeling, how is bump 😔😔 it has still affected her 12 mths later

With my first, I told anyone that I would share that I had a loss with pretty quickly. After we had shared with all our immediate families around 10 weeks I let my MIL tell who she wanted as long as it was kept off social media (she doesn't have any accounts but her sisters do). After I let my job know and we posted our own announcement they were free to tell whoever they wanted.

I found it was easier to tell people I’d lost one when they had no idea I was even pregnant. Those that knew, when I had to tell them it wasn’t meant to be, it was hugely emotional and double the upset.

You do what is best for you, I personally only told family before 12 weeks, & then with my first I told everyone after 12 weeks however with my 2nd baby I only told family, everyone else found out after I had the baby, my sister however has sadly lost 3 children, 1 after birth & 2 after 12 weeks & she didn’t tell anyone until after 12 weeks (family included)

We only told people who happened to reach out to us just in normal interactions as and when it happened. We didn’t do any sort of “announcement.” The people who see and talk to you regularly will find out soon enough, the wider world doesn’t need to know any of your business.

Love this idea!!

I told my mil that she could tell people at 10 weeks which I kind of regret now but I said if anything happened she would be fielding all those people and I only wanted support from my closest people not some random woman she works with and she agreed but tbh I wish I hadn’t even tho nothing happened because I felt like I didn’t have control over my own pregnancy.

We chose to tell only immediate family at 12 weeks. I had a miscarriage last year and knew I wouldn't want to deal with telling everyone if it happend again. A few weeks later I let my mom tell extended family if she wanted but warned her that if anything did happen it would be on her to tell them and I would not respond to any texts/calls about it. I'm 19 weeks now and we still have "announced" anything.

My best friend was the very first to know cause I did the pregnancy test with her in her bathroom 😂 then I told my family, close friends who I told them to keep it secret. Posted it on Facebook 3 months before she was born.

We had a scare with our first and waited until 20 weeks or later

Whoever YOU want whenever YOU want. We swore friends and parents to secrecy when we told them. We had to tell family sooner than later because we were moving across the country when I was 12 weeks. My parents asked me "we're seeing so-and-so for dinner. Is it okay if we tell them?" My in-laws did the same. I told my best friend the day I took the test because I needed support. Told my husband after I went to confirm with a doctor. (keep in mind I found out at 3 weeks). Told my parents at 5 weeks (they were leaving the country for a trip and that's not info I wanted to give them over FaceTime). Told my bestie of 20 years the week after. Told my in-laws when we closed on our house (7 weeks). We told their friends when we came out to see our house (8/9 weeks). Told the family in person at 12 weeks right before we left.

I was in exactly the same boat as you, I hope you're OK x