This isn't strictly pregnancy related but a massive shock to the system. Within the last 30mins me and my partner have found out about a sudden loss in his family. Its sad for sure but I'm not feeling sad or loss or anything really. This person has had a recent stay in hospital and wasn't looking the best when he came out so non of us really knew what was going to happen. I'm 36 weeks today and my mum has organised a baby shower for Saturday. I'm now worried baby's birth will be overshadowed by this loss. Has anyone got any tips on maybe processing this time or anything? It's currently 4:40am and I have loads of appointments today so I can't even be there to support his family
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I think the biggest thing is you need to let those who need to grieve grieve and just have as much patience as you can, that being said trying to maintain a sense of normality is never a bad thing. It’s really difficult to say as everyone is different and it depends how close your partner was to the deceased as well. It’s also ok for you not to feel grief so you should never feel bad because your not really feeling it yourself xx All you can do is be their for your partner and his family but keep everything moving x maybe the lead up to baby will serve as a welcome distraction, you’d be surprised how quickly some people grieve and in a week or so the shock will have gone and you may find it has very little impact on day to day life xx Try not to worry xx

@Emma thank you for your kind words. I really appreciate it. I think how early it is might have been more of a shock

I had my baby shower last Saturday and my mum’s best friend/ my god mother had to go in an ambulance within the first half an hour. Everyone was shocked and sad but I felt absolutely nothing I think it was just because I was overwhelmed. You’ll find your mind will be elsewhere you won’t even realise people are missing from the shower if they are grieving. That being said, it may be a nice thing for people to attend to take their mind off it. I think as long as you don’t take it personally if they don’t show up then you will be fine. We are also at the very end of my Grandad’s life and I’m just hoping he holds out for next 5 weeks to meet little one. I know it sounds strange to some but I just want some photos of them together and then I will be at peace. He’s been sick for an awfully long time and I never thought he’d ever be here to see my baby. It has crossed my mind that if something bad happens it will be right by the birth now, so don’t feel bad about thinking that x

@Marissa thank you. I appreciate it. Its difficult when you don't have any emotions to express around it all

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