Worried about sending child to nursery

The story about the nursery worker has really affected me too. I wasn’t really nervous about him going to nursery before as he’s such a confident baby and think he’ll absolutely love it. But since the court case of her I can’t really get it out of my head. My boy has some settling in sessions next week, he’s only going to be going for two days and I am so happy with the nursery I chose, all the staff seemed lovely. But it’s so incredibly overwhelming to put your trust into someone to look after and care for your baby, especially someone you don’t really know. I just keep telling myself that his behaviour and temperament will change if he’s not happy there and I’ll immediately follow my instinct with it

Same here. Cried a few times about the poor baby girl. I also have nearby the nursery where a 9 month old died after choking on food. Not quite the same but the court case is also going on now. My LG will be just over 12 months old when due to go to nursery and I'm really trying not to dispare. I keep telling myself that plenty of children go to nurseries, are happy and get to go home. Somehow it's not enough to convince me.

Same! That story haunts me, poor little girl, so so awful! That area is also only approx 25-30 mins from me too. What an evil woman and what I can’t get my head around is how other staff saw it happen and didn’t do anything. I read on the comments on fb the views about understaffing , false ratios and how staff aren’t actually properly trained on safe sleep and it’s made me so so anxious. I kind of want to bring it up at the nursery we are going with but know it might not go down well as in staff might take offence I’m even asking (as you say super rare) but still happened v close to home and it terrifies me that you can just have bad people in any job. Be good to hear from nursery staff on your post hopefully to alleviate any worries 😓

@Emma yeah that’s what I read now I’m so worried! I just don’t understand how someone lacking that much empathy and care for children even got the job in the first place ! Poor baby don’t know why none of them didn’t go help the baby so now it makes me feel sick all because she wasn’t sleeping when she wanted well what baby does. The fact they even strapped them on beanbags to sleep usually is awful to me and I don’t want my baby to feel scared/alone I’m almost thinking of how can I not go back but financially I have to !

@Claudia yeah plenty of children do what I’m trying to think of just one horrendous story but still can’t help my worry

@Amelia yeah so true we will be able to see a change in them if anything is happening. Just have to trust our instincts

What happened to that baby girl was horrific and the fact that it's a nursery by you, I can understand your anxiety/fear even more. I would say as you say you need to put her in - a couple of things yo look at - look at childminders as an option if you think that you don't want to look at nurseries because of what happened and how close to home it is. If you chose a childminder, visit the home and ask questions and trust your gut. If you don't have a good feeling or like the place/person then don't use it. See how they interact with the kids, if you can get references, if you can get the DBS checks. If you do check nurseries look up the ofsted reports and read the comments. See how they interact with the kids when you visit and ask questions. Trust your gut. Visit as many as possible to see what's out there. The nurseries should have apps where they upload pictures, give updates etc. The one I'm putting my 18 mo (will be 2yo) in Nov has all this. That's my best advice and it's understandable to worry. ❤️

You can’t paint everyone with he same brush. Yes it is daunting but please don’t be worried. My LO has been going to nursery 4 days a week since he was 4 months old. You can just tell they absolutely adore him and give us constant updates via the app. I am completely rest assured. He gets 1-2-1 care because he is so young. All I can say is that I hope this gives you some hope there are still wonderful people who care for our babies out there xx

Same! It’s an awful story and I can’t get it out of my head. I’ve also started thinking about things like when I change his nappy ‘someone else will do this soon’ etc etc. it’s so daunting! I just keep trying to tell myself I love the nursery I have chosen and it will help his development massively. Being around other children, having the structure of the nursery etc is so good for them. Also, the nursery can do activities with him that I could never do which will keep him so much more entertained than being stuck at home with me all day. It also means I get back to work, which financially for our household is a huge benefit. It’s been hard having this time off and not being able to comfortably spend money on him. I can’t wait to take him here, there and everywhere when I have the funds to do so! x

My mum is a childminder and we are living with her atm (baby 10 weeks) and even though I can see how wonderful her and her staff are with my LO and all the other kids, I still feel SUPER anxious about leaving her here full time (not for ages, hopefully) - I think that’s just what being a mother is sometimes! We are not really supposed to leave our babies, but of course we have to! I hope I get over the anxiety… I don’t know the story of the nurseries you’re talking about and I’m scared to read about them in case it makes my anxiety even worse! If I couldn’t bring my LO to my mum, I would definitely be looking at childminders, or nurseries where I had heard lots of firsthand reviews from other local parents. I would not be afraid to ask anything at all that worries me. In fact, I will even be asking my mum lots of questions, to make sure I know exactly what to expect and also to ensure my mum knows I want the best for my LO… 😅

When i worked at a nursery in London before going on mat leave, there was an incident around safe sleep at a different nursery in London (don't really know where or what the story was), but the next team meeting we had, new rules were put in place around sleep and they explained safe sleep to us all again (even though I'd never seen unsafe sleep practices at my work at all!). So things like this are taken very seriously usually, even though they're so so awful! And don't be afraid to ask any questions to the staff at the nursery you've picked, they're there to help, and if they have good knowledge and procedures in place they won't mind answering your questions at all 😊

I totally understand where you’re coming from. I’m not considering nursery until 2 ish then only part time

I saw a really positive about bahy going to nursery on here yesterday ill see if I can find it for some inspiration x

https://www.peanut-app.io/share/O39cRomBSJb

What I found is paperwork ie reports of ofsted etc is not relevant but I trust my gut and that's what I go by

Me ! This woman lived 2 streets away from me and I am now terrified! I'm genuinely looking to see if any work places need my job for nights because I'm so nervous now. I wonder where the other staff were and if they're working at other nurseries local to me 😪

@Charly I didn’t even think of that I’m in south Manchester so that’s true they could work in Stockport anywhere or south Manchester how scary they should all be banned from working with children if they were ignoring what was happening😔

I know, I'm thinking of sending my lg to a nursery in the Peak District where my mum lives and getting a job there maybe as i know someone I trust who runs a nursery there and that just might give me better peace of mind. I've found some local nice nurseries though and I know not all are the same but I cant help it I'm so nervous now. Also my lg is incredibly anxious herself and cries/screams a lot which is another reason why I'm worried.