Baby showers
I've posted before about being rather stressed about the baby shower. My sister was organising it, and then my mum through her dummy out of the pram and insisted on doing it. (Nice that she wants to, but she's overbearing and will make it a boozy party - despite me and my sister telling her its not really the done thing - I don't drink anyway never mind the fact that as the guess of honor I cant!)
Anyway, my sister messaged a few weeks ago saying the girls in the office ( I used to work there but now work for a company where I've not really met many people) wanted to know what to get so I sent her my amazon list, its all smaller things on there, nothing massive. I've only got a couple of more expensive things to get and I'm more of a if people want to gift me anything they can choose....
But my mum has already spent this morning (it's literally just turned 9am) hounding me for a list which I gave her as an idea of the items I still need - and she's like you need a proper list, with links!
That is just not me! Like I said I would be happy to receive any gift atall, or just for people to turn up and wish me well or give advice etc
I know there's no right or wrong but I just keep feeling like I'm being pressured into dictating to people.
Like a girl I work with now, when she found out I was pregnant was like I will make you something, and then when I told her the sex etc she got on with making me something that was a surprise. She's made me a pram blanket and a cardigan and I absolutely love them both and they have her personality all over them you know?
Just a rant really. I dont think there's much I can do to change my mum at this stage! Thank for listening xxx
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Sorry this is so stressful for you. I didn’t really want a baby shower either but basically got told I was selfish if I didn’t. I also don’t really want much. I have worked as a nanny for the last 15 years so know exactly what I want and don’t. I have used myregistry (it’s an app) for a gift list cause people also kept asking. I found it really easy to use and could add things from any website. I also suggested if people weren’t sure to buy Amazon gift cards as they are always useful. It’s so awkward asking for gifts from people. Don’t know if this will help with your mum but at least you will be giving her the links she wants!
Hey - sorry to hear this. I also have a mum who can be very over bearing. Unfortunately it's a long road if you want to set boundaries and can be quite upsetting at times BUTTT it's worth it in the long run. I've had to put my foot down over a few things the last few years and my mum has really started to back-off. I have two other siblings where they don't have as many boundaries so sometimes I find that my mum "defaults" and oversteps the mark with me but, again, I enforce the boundary and accept any upset/silent treatment/sulking. My mum really does care and isn't a horrible person, she just has the picture in her head of what she thinks is the best thing for everyone then tries to push/enforce it to ensure they're happy. However, like you know, it's not always the best thing for you 🙈 So I suppose the best advice I can give you is to try and enforce some boundaries so your mum starts to understand where that line is x sounds like your sister is supportive & understanding which is great xx
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