What do I do first?
I’m planning to leave my narcissistic partner of 7 years. I have a 1 year old and a mortgage and I know that he is going to make it hell for me. He blames me for the failure of our relationship.
I don’t know where to start in regards to leaving.
I don’t want to leave my daughter with him. I have many reasons why. I don’t think he would ever purposely hurt her but there has been situations that could have put her at potential risk, when he has not been thinking. I don’t want to ever put her in a position that could risk her safety, just because he’s “her dad”. His family aren’t exactly people I want to leave her with either. They have very extreme views which I don’t want her to be exposed to. Her dad and his family have never been with her whilst I’ve not been around.
I felt trapped for so long, knowing that if I left, I was going to have to put her in situations I wasn’t comfortable with. I have been riddled with anxiety at the thought of being away from her but it’s got to the point where the relationship is becoming more and more toxic that I know by staying purely because of my fears, is going to do more harm than good.
What do I do? Where do I start? Where do I go?
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I’ve never been in this situation but my idea would be to go and find a lawyer and just a lay of the land about what your options are about taking your daughter and your mortgage if you share it with him.
I’ve been in this situation and everything has suggested is exactly what you need to do.
Evidence is your friend, always remain calm and level headed (very hard to do when a child is involved), as narcissists like to make you look crazy.
Plan it, don’t just walk out (unless you feel unsafe), stick to your guns. Once you’ve been away from him for a few weeks, your head will become much clearer and you’ll realise that you haven’t been yourself for some time. Good luck!
Line your ducks First. Don't leave until you have safe passage and your daughter. He will
Use her against you. Get safe, get out
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