Friendships as adults..

If you’ve answered “No cos I don’t want them to” what are the reasons for this?

I don't like surprise pop-by's, gives me great anxiety. I need my day planned in advance 😂

Also depends on where you live I guess, in London I don't think people do this unless you're close. Where my in-laws live up north it's a little more common

I don't have anyone to do that anyway 😕

My fiance and I don't like it when someone family or not, randomly pops up to our home without letting us know. If you're in the area and you asks us if it's okay then we'll let you know. But other than that, we'd appreciate a heads up.

@Charlene 😘

@Sam have you found that has stopped people coming to see you though by being very regimented about it?

@Dominique oh really? I think it shows people care personally

Yeah lol. It depends on the person I guess. I have adhd and it shows more care to me if people respect how my brain works (i.e. Planning ahead) rather than just showing up unannounced

Nope. The only person who does it is my mother in law. Until my fiance tells her otherwise, she'll keep doing it. I would tell her but that's his problem lol.

I can't fathom someone not at least calling first!!!!! Be prepared to get an eyefull....

I think it’s just respectful to call ahead when planning to visit someone. I don’t like “stopping bys”. I want to plan, tidy up, fix my hair, buy milk if needed lol. People that know me are aware of my boundaries, and respect it (thankfully !) I don’t have unexpected visitors because of this 😁

I used to with my mother all the time and then I moved but neither of my siblings do Pop ins

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DDk6MuJpv31/?igsh=ajFkdHJ1b3B3OTd5 basically this lol

I have a neighbour who specifically told me to come by anytime with my daughter. But whenever I do, I feel like her family already has plans to go somewhere or someone they invited is coming over. She’ll tell me I only have 20-30min until we’re doing xx. So we don’t go over there too often because I don’t want to feel like I’m barging in. Even though she told me it’s fine, it’s probably better to plan ahead. I suppose if you make it clear to certain people to come over anytime and they’re always welcome, then maybe they will?

I definitely wouldn’t care if people come over unannounced some people used to when he had friends that lived in the same apartment complex but now we don’t really know enough people where we currently live to have anyone do that. But I always had the feeling that it was in movies and shows and no one does that in real life and it bums me out. 🤣

It’s so rude to pop by without notice . People have own life , routines outside of their friendship . Always ask in advance.

I would hate people dropping in without at least a text to as i might be doing something or just might not feel like having someone at my house. It only respectful to ask first

Hmmm sorry don’t agree with you guys.. I think it’s rude to not be grateful if someone pops rounds. Family and close friends shouldn’t need an invitation. What if you’re lonely cos people don’t come to see you much? Not everyone is good at planning every minute of their life 🙄 The world is crazy and I don’t think there’s enough love anymore and distancing yourself cos your house is untidy or your hair isn’t blow dried isn’t really that important. The poll tells me at least there’s still people out there who value their family and friends over their own needs 💕

@Jay don’t be silly

@Annabel wow you must have one strict routine of a life 🙈

Lol @ incog - you're asking for peoples opinions. Not everyone has the same personality or ability to receive attention whenever is right for the people popping by. All I personally need is my expectations managed. I don't care what the state of my house would be, it's the lack of control of my day that I dislike

I think it’s very inconvenient and inconsiderate… don’t be rude

My boyfriend be saying my phone be dry

I think it's rude that people do that for their own convenience. What if I was walking around naked? What if I was trying to put my baby sleep? What if you're not up for entertaining people and you just want to be alone? My home is my sanctuary. Why would I want it to be randomly disturbed? What if I was praying?