Pls give me honest opinions, feel like such a terrible horrible mum 😢😢

My son is autistic, he’s 3 and it’s a common thing he eats zero fruit or veg and only likes particular things and it’s not the healthiest. It’s better them eat than not at all. His dr recommended we give vitamins so he’s getting a little goodness. Try not to be so hard on yourself

If it makes you feel any better, my eldest isn’t autistic but is a very picky eater and will only really eat freezer food. Breakfast and lunch are fine and he’ll eat a good selection of things, but dinner time he gradually went off things like lasagne, cottage pie, pasta bake etc. He mainly now just eats fish fingers, nuggets and pancakes 🥲 I used to get stressed out over it but I’m so used to it now hahah. He has multivitamins with his breakfast too which makes me feel a bit better x

I still struggle with general disordered eating ontop of my Arfid even to this day, because I went undiagnosed at the time (and for long after too) and was forced to sit at the table & eat or go to bed hungry for the first 5-6 years of my life. You are doing amazing. Doesn’t matter if the foods from the freezer, if there’s food on the plate and you’re concerned with how much nutrition your child is getting, you’re not a bad mother.

Thank you guys so much😢 I give him multivitamins in the morning in his milk. He’s almost 3 also. He loves his fruit(most of them anyway) veg is a no no now😔 and freezer food he loves 🤣. You have made me feel so much better 🤍🤍

One thing that could be worth exploring is seeing if he wants to get involved in cooking the healthier options you have in mind! Sometimes being apart of making the food helps the eating the food part feel far less daunting, and even if eating the food you made together doesn’t happen, he still practiced practical life skills and fine motor abilities (:

I just want to explain as someone who is autistic and has issues with food… the problem with veggies and sometimes fruits is that they lack consistency. Once I heard that it all clicked for me. Cuz we want to know what to expect. When I was a kid the only veggies I ate were canned ones and looking back its probably cuz the consistency and same thing potentially with the freezer stuff. It’s also why as a kid I only liked kfc’s mashed potatoes vs home made. Consistency in taste and texture. Not sure if this will help but thought maybe if you understood what it could be the issue you can work with it 🤷🏻

I used to work in a care home specifically for young people with autism. I found this to be quite a common thing and a lot of the food aversions stemmed from textures. One boy would absolutely refuse to have sandwiches, but as soon as I toasted them he wolfed them down. We then realised he didn’t like anything of a soft consistency and wanted stuff with a crunch, which is probably why they loved fried food so much. Also agree with what Parker said, getting involved in the cooking may make them then want to try it even just a small amount or like they also said, it’s aiding life/motor skills. You’re doing amazing as a mum please don’t doubt yourself ❤️

Even with a 3 year old that isn’t autistic we still have these issues, just keep presenting him with foods you make as much as possible. Frozen food is okay! As long as he’s not just eating chips and fast food and cookies all the time. You just wanna keep it balanced, everything in moderation. You’re NOT a bad mom!!!🤍 Some things that work for us are smoothies and pouches! You can also put a small scoop of protein powder or super greens in a smoothie or milk to give him what he needs! Picky kids can be hard! And sometimes it’s just a phase. Just keep trying, you’re doing your best, if he gets hungry he’ll eat, kids are smart.

What if you fried the veggies,coat it with eggs and some flour, if it’s the texture.especially eggplant. Or freeze them ,put it in his favorite package then to reheat just bake it . You are a good mom ,you are worried,you are looking for information and you are trying  everything you can ,that’s a good mom 💞

Maybe start by making homemade versions of the frozen foods. And fewer snacks. I don’t know how old your child is but my 2 year old has 1 afternoon snack a day and eats well but maybe 2 snacks a day to start. I selected your second option but I don’t think you’re a bad mom. I just wouldn’t give up!

the autism is going to be a big hurdle for you but what i do w my kids is i just don’t buy the junk. it’s an adjustment when u first start but if when they open the fridge or freezer there’s only healthy or home cooked options they won’t even be looking for the junk anymore. currently the only boxed item in my freezer from a grocery store is a box of waffles. everything else is meat, breadcrumbs i made, and frozen veggies. i buy TONS of produce from ALDI and that was my sons snack of choice today (strawberries). granted my son doesn’t have autism but u might want to try purging the things u dont want him eating. out of sight out of mind is so real 🤍 good luck

You guys are amazing thank you so so much 😢. Getting him involved in the cooking is such a great idea! I will try this. Also smoothies with some sneaky veg I could try this!!! He loves a crunch!!! I have noticed this. But then again he likes sandwiches etc. it’s such a worry I want him to have the best but as long as he is eating I will be happy! 🤍🤍🤍

@Lyss it’s weird isn’t it, he will eat waffles, star shape potatoes, chips all those kind of things but won’t have mash or boiled or roasted etc. he used to eat cucumber a lot but does not touch it now 😢😢😢 x

Safe foods being off once can be end up turning us off wanting to consume it for a while, but it’s always worth asking again (: or even trying something similar like maybe zucchini

@Parker 又 have not tried that with him I don’t even think I’ve tried that, maybe us trying it together would work? 🤞🏽 x

Sorry I selected by mistake

I recommend following growing.intuitive.eaters on Instagram!! She has a whole video series on exactly this. She is neurodivergent herself, and is a registered dietician. Super helpful. You’re doing great!!

When my son was 2 I spoke to the hv about how he eats the same thing day in and day out nothing else (at that point it was greggs frozen streak bakes now it's cetain nuggets) when she spoke to the dietician about a referral they just said oh his eating it's fine, his now 6 years old and things haven't changed at all, eats the same food for dinner everyday without fail We are trying to get an autism referral but it's not been easy but that's for other reasons too not just his eating I'm hoping he will eventually start eating other foods as we always offer him other things

@Emma-louise has your HV put forward to the paediatrician for an autism referral??? We have just got put on the list and I have heard it can be years I’m hoping it’s not though 😢 it’s so hard isn’t it but mums know best!!!! X

I have ARFID - the doctors used to tell my parents that I was happy, healthy, and eating and that’s what matters. ARFID sucks I’m sorry I know I was such a stress on my mom

My son is such a picky eater that for a while it was only chicken nuggets and corndogs and he has literally gagged on things so hard he actually throws up but I noticed as he gets older and tries new things he likes them. He is 6 now and eats a variety of different “dinner type food”. In my opinion as long as they are fed and at least trying a new food once a week, I will make him whatever his little heart desires. I just try to switch it up, if he eats noodles for dinner one day then it’s nuggets the next, then Mac and cheese or whatever else the day after that.

If he likes crunchy have you tried celery and carrots?

In the same boat my son will eat apples grapes watermelon bananas no veg dinners or lunch is normally chicken nuggets has to be the same brand or he wont eat them sausage rolls either from gregs or aulds and it needs to be in the bag potato scones and sometimes noodles he used to be such a good eater so this is hard for me but if hes eating its what we do

Unfortunately they didn't refer him and then it was to late because it has to be through school now and his teacher is useless Many other parents believe the teacher may have autism herself and isn't recognising my sons habits But yes it really can take years I've spoken to mums in my area who it took them years and years for a diagnosis Unfortunately

My son is the same with food! Won’t eat any home cooked meals or anything healthy apart from fruit, which he loves thankfully. Won’t touch any veg what so ever apart from corn on the cob. I end up wasting food and it’s hard as I have a baby too which means I’m often making 3 different meals/variations of meals 😩I don’t have any advice but just wanted to say you’re not alone and hopefully it’s a phase they will come out of 🤞