Whingy toddler. HELP!

Omg I could have totally wrote this myself, I’m in the SAME situation as you down to reflux / CMPA and age / walking and talking. The past 18 months have been hell on earth for us at times and now the tantrums have started it’s even tougher. I envy people who say they love being a mum because honestly I have times where I hate it, he paddies over the smallest things / when we say ‘no’. He screams on every car journey, we have to almost bend him in half to get him into his car seat and pram. He loves to walk everywhere which is great and he’s very ourdoorsy but he has so much energy to burn, he’s slept through in his own bed for one week of his life then it stopped, it’s exhausting. I have no words of wisdom but just to say you are not alone ♥️

@Charlotte thank you so much for your reply ❤️ I have more days than I'd care to admit at the moment where I totally regret the decision to have a child. I was in no way disillusioned about motherhood and parenthood being hard but didn't expect the reflux, cmpa and the whining and not sleeping ALL AT ONCE. I haven't went back to work yet but am hoping to in July time and wondering if this will make a difference to how I feel. Are you back at work? We even hired a sleep consultant which cost us nearly £500! X

I totally feel you I’m going through / feeling the exact same I could’ve wrote it word for word, I’ve been back at work since last September and he goes to childminders 2 days a week and grandparents another two but honestly sometimes I can’t wait to drop him off and dread the hours between pick up and bedtime especially when he’s having a bad day! I agree with you that nothing can prepare you for this. I don’t ever recall reading about whingy CMPA / reflux babies that never sleep somehow! I wish I did though as it wouldved helped me through the tough days. I do find comfort knowing it’s not just us though! X

Hey girls, we have had exactly the same thing. If you ever fancy chatting, drop me a message. Reflux, cmpa, tongue tie etc. Even now, he is still a very high needs toddler and very hard to please compared to every child I know. My bestie I made from this app also has been going through the same thing too. Its good to connect with other mums going through the same. Finding Beth really helped me mentally. Always happy to create a group chat! She lives in Inverness & I’m in Suffolk, so distance is no issue. 😃✨

I really hope you do message, I can’t actually explain how much knowing other people have been living the same experience has helped me. Idk if it’s just me, but I have become way less empathetic to mums I know irl & the problems they’re experiencing… Because compared to what we have experienced & are still experiencing… It’s nothing. And as awful as this sounds to say, but I’ll say it…. Other mums, they don’t get it. They can say they get it, but they don’t. They say no mums live the same experience, but realistically 99% of mums don’t get even close to this experience. That’s why there’s so little posts like this. I posted so much at the start like this & no-one would reply, as they didn’t get it, and that’s where having other friends who have and are still going through it, has really helped me. I know I was seriously seriously low for a long time, even recently I got pretty low, so I really hope you reach out. ❤️

hey girls I'm going through the same!! exhausted and ppl ask me if I'm gona have a other one, and I'm like hell no I'm done, I don't sleep. it's nice knowing I'm not just the only one

@Pam Reflux and the whole shebang? Feel free to message me! Always up for chatting and making new mum friends. Were not too far away either! ❤️

I couldn’t have said this better myself. My LO has never slept. Faught every nap. Our first walk in the pram was 6 months old because she just screamed all the while on a walk. She lived in the baby carrier. She also had silent reflux and was on omeprozole and CMPA and also 90% eczema. Her moaning has got better it used to be all day everyday now it’s probably 3/4 bad days out of a week. She screams in the car, like every car journey no matter if it’s 5 mins or an hour. It’s awful!! All night long all she does is itch. We get hardly any sleep!! In the day she itches you can turn your back on her. Sometimes I am so fed up!!

@Sarah I’m really sorry you’re going through all of this. 😢 I can imagine your little one is very uncomfortable. We caved to TV in the car as the screaming was too much for us. Sometimes you have to do what you have to do. Always here for a chat if you need. Dm is always open. ❤️

@Bex we have caved to the phone too, it helps for a bit but sometimes even that doesn’t work she just hates the car. I can never go anywhere on my own because I can’t concentrate driving. I was not prepared for all of this. I think I morn what other people have and how easy it is for some people when I am running around ragged bearly surviving the day. You to hun, I know exactly what this feels like xx

@Sarah thiiiiis this is what I feel like too. Message me your number & we can whatsapp and chit chat! The anonymous poster & I were chatting all day yesterday, crazy how similar oir experiences have been. 😢❤️

@Bex @Sarah can I ask if any of your little ones were given antibiotics shortly after birth? My little one was within minutes (thought we both had sepsis) and he’s currently on his 4th bout of tonsillitis since October, all times requiring hospital admission. I’ve done some reading online and it says antibiotics within a week of birth can weaken immune system and also affect ability to break down cows protein, so I don’t know if it’s starting to make sense to me as a reason behind all the trouble we have gone through / continue to go through or if it’s just purely coincidence so just wanted to know your experiences also! X

@Charlotte No we didn’t. But we did have a traumatic birth, ended in csec, huge swelling on head, I had an infection & then Cooper got jaundice. 4th lot of tonsillitis screams enlarged adenoids to me. Have you seen an ENT? Is your little one a noisy breather, during the day or at night? Is he a restless sleeper & does he mouth breathe/ have his mouth open a lot? xxx

No we didn’t either but my birth wasn’t the easiest either. She had jaundice too and nearly needed the light therapy. She was also very swelled. She did have tonsillitis in October when she turned one. We’ve noticed when she’s poorly too her tonsils go red. Xx

@Bex my little one had jaundice too, but just below the limits for light therapy! we haven’t seen ENT, I did take him to the GP today who said he can refer if it’s somethitn we wanted, hadn’t even considered it as an option as we are already under Neurology and Cardiology (he has seizures when he gets the temps from tonsillitis which causes him to also faint and stop breathing needing resuscitation!!) we’ve just always been told they won’t even consider removing his tonsils! He’s a horrendous sleeper, haven’t noticed him mouth breathing but he snores like an old man at times, very dribbly too! Xx

@Charlotte Snoring and dribbling are both a huuuuuge sign of adenoids, its really not normal for children to snore. It is a sign of an airway issue. Id 100% see an ent. It was such a quick look up the nose and down the throat. I’ll attach some other signs, but really its such a quick thing to do, I’d just check if I was you to be certain as it can be really horrible for them if they are enlarged. My little one has also had seizures but completely different to yours. Im so sorry you’re going through that. Not the same as yours, but hes had 3, they were like absences? He would freeze, hold his breath and not respond to anything, even if I shook him, for maybe 20 seconds and then gasp for air, then go on as if nothing happened.

Sorry, I feel like I say so much, this has just all consumed me for the past 18 months, so I feel like if any of it helps anyone, id rather post it & people can take it or leave it.

@Bex I’ll definitely take a look into it further, thank you! I do know we have someone in the family who’s had hers taken out recently (adenoids and tonsils) as it was affecting her sleep, didn’t even think this was something we could be experiencing too! Alfie has had 4 episodes of seizures now, twice he’s had what they think start off as absent seizures - where they just sit and stare and don’t respond etc, unfortunately for us this also then turns into the fainting / not breathing hence needing resuscitation, it’s all so scary and having to deal with this now ontop of everything else it’s just making our lives miserable, knowing there’s nothing they can do to fix it! He’s also had episodes of ‘breath holding’ when he has extreme emotions (usually tantrums!!) where he turns blue and stops breathing for a couple of seconds and is sleepy when he comes around. Again, somethitn he should grow out of but still not nice to witness x

@Charlotte That does sound incredibly scary. 😦 have you got a good support system? ❤️ Yes! We have the breath holding too!!! I haven’t met anyone else with that! Ive noticed it if C gets overwhelmed, if the tv is too stimulating or if its in too long, or sometimes when he’s really concentrating. Have you noticed it at those times too? Or just when he’s upset? Im not sure ours is as severe as yours, he seems to hold his breathe out of choice, not like your son.

@Bex yes I do luckily and I’ve also started with talking therapies, yet to have my first session but we shall see! The breath holding has only happened twice, both times when he’s got himself so worked up and really upset, the Neurologist said that if he does that he can be more prone to the seizures he’s been having 🤷‍♀️ don’t know why exactly but it was something he mentioned! I have friends and family with children a similar age to Alfie and I swear if they just walked an hour in my shoes, never mind a day, they’d have the shock of their lives and I’m not exaggerating!x

@Charlotte fellow therapy girl here too. It’s helping I think. I hope yours does too. Hmmm, i think being under a neurologist is good. Atleast everything’s been taken seriously. Urghhh its so hard not to compare isn’t it. I went out with a friend today who has 2 boys & her 2 combined are half as hard as my 1 haha. But she helps, so it’s cool ha.