Is it wrong not to invite dad’s side of the family to the 1st birthday?

My son will be 12 months on the 31st of May. We have been planning his birthday party. However I am skeptical of inviting his dad’s side of the family. Over the few years I have been with my boyfriend, my family and I have dealt with a LOT of disrespect from his family. Not only that, during the pregnancy, birth, and postpartum my boyfriend’s mother has not reached out nor supported me at all. She even questioned if my son was really her grandson biologically. She wanted us to get a paternity test done. She rarely greets me, and when I’ve tried to extend the olive branch and invite her to lunch she didn’t respond. I personally don’t want them there at his 1st birthday. I don’t think that they deserve to celebrate this milestone when they’ve done nothing but be a thorn in my side. My family has even said they won’t come if my boyfriend’s family is there. What do you all think?

Show your support

I wouldn’t unless your husband really wants them there

protect your peace girl no need to involve yourself with people who do not support you and your family

I wouldn’t invite them

I wouldn’t and I didn’t do it last year for my little girls birthday and won’t be doing it this year they haven’t even even met her x

I wouldn’t, I’m sorry she’s been so terrible to you :(

Also my baby is turning 1 on June 1st almost bday twins🥳🥳 you deserve to celebrate too, have fun and don’t think twice about them!

This conversation and strangers opinions are moot. You need to talk to your boyfriend. He is just as much a parent to your son as you are. And this is coming from someone who is going through the same thing with my fiancés family. If your boyfriend wants them there and they don’t get invited, that’s instant resentment that will affect your relationship. My family also really struggled coming around his family, especially when they’d have to witness how cold they were towards me, but my family always put me and my daughters above their opinions of his family. My fiancé is a great man and he heard my concerns about his family and we put boundaries in place together that protected everyone’s peace.

I’m not saying your feelings aren’t valid, because they absolutely are!!!! I didn’t talk to his family or attend any get togethers for almost a full year. But if we hosted a bday party, they were invited and I just hung out with my family. I’m just saying your boyfriend’s feelings are valid too and this post doesn’t include them so any answers you get are one sided. 😊

@Mylei I understand! I will talk to him about how I’m feeling. Unfortunately he doesn’t really like his family either. But it’s worth talking to him about it and maybe we can set those boundaries so both families can be there

Honestly, my fiancé isnt a big fan of his family either. Unfortunately, it’s just not black and white when it comes to feelings. Especially with family. I honestly don’t really like my family either. 😂 a lot of times no contact or low contact with family is soooo much more complex than I just don’t like them that much though. You might find that he’s in agreement that they don’t deserve to celebrate the milestone! But he will probably be carrying a lot of guilt regardless. Unfortunately, in his shoes, he hurts someone, his family or you. So while you’re hurt, try to remember he’s stuck between a rock and hard place. It’s just definitely a conversation! If you wanna message me and talk more in depth about it, I gotchu, girl! Just hit me up. 🫶🏼 I’ve been with my man for 5 years and my relationship with his side has only started improving in like the last 9 months lol. So I know how hard this is!

Definitely not

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